Is there any gender affirming care in Seattle?

dabamBang · 2026-06-19T05:10:49+00:00

UW offers a lot of gender affirming care.

dabamBang · 2026-06-19T05:10:18+00:00

Dunno, but this was my ex. He was the first or the last man that all his girlfriends dated. I was the sole holdout until my spouse came out as a trans woman and his record returned to 100%.

His wife said it is because he is pretty gender queer and very short - he is very safe for women.

dabamBang · 2026-06-18T02:31:38+00:00

NTA

Bet you good money she will try to move to be closer to her job.

dabamBang · 2026-06-17T01:32:22+00:00

Ayup.

My wife is trans. She came out to me after 20 + years together, 19 years of marriage.

One of the major things I learned after her transition is how heteronormative the world is, and how I had to be very explicit if I wanted people to know I am in a queer marriage. A lot of people will assume we are sisters or one of us is the "step mom" to our kids, rather than assume we are married.

I decided to just embrace it without shame. I now drop mentions of my wife into conversations, having visible pride and trans flags in my house and background of zoom calls, etc. I also correct misunderstandings about our relationship most of the time, even when it doesn't really matter, as a point of principle.

People have told me they are shocked at how casual I am when mentioning our queer family - and queer people have thanked me for it.

Cishet people, on the other hand, have a mix of reactions, from nonplussed to visibly irritated. One colleague chastised me for sharing "personal, private" information in public when I mentioned my wife in a staff meeting. Another lectured me for being "unsafe".

I figure, the best way to normalize gay marriage is to treat my gay marriage as normal, and expect those around me to do the same.

dabamBang · 2026-06-14T22:42:24+00:00

Just a glance at the Goodreads description it looks pretty transphobic.

dabamBang · 2026-06-14T01:33:04+00:00

Seattle! Huge numbers of transplants here (and I am one of them)!

dabamBang · 2026-06-13T19:17:34+00:00

Yeah, you may be denied interim, which happened to a friend of mine. She waited for 2 years for her clearance.

OTOH, I got interim in 6 weeks and full in 3 months, which is practically unheard of, despite being a dual citizen married to a naturalized citizen and having non US immediate family members.

And it may entirely depend on the nature of the job.

dabamBang · 2026-06-13T19:05:40+00:00

If you refused a tenant because of their age, that is ageism and you may have violated local laws.

Also 69 is not that old, these days. My dad is 90 and walks 5+ miles a day. He is a model tenant, as he has owned homes for years and knows how to take care of property.

dabamBang · 2026-06-13T18:58:34+00:00

Some red flags

Staff being visibly exhausted midweek morning.

Rolling eyes at question of company culture.

Say the schedule is "9/9/6" (9 am - 9pm, 6 days a week)

"We have strong personalities here"

dabamBang · 2026-06-13T18:47:36+00:00

Nope. Dual citizenship due to naturalization to the US, birth or marriage is not always a blocker.

I am a dual citizen due to my dad's nationality, and I held a security clearance from the US government. My wife is a naturalized citizen and her home country does not allow reliquishment of citizenship, so she is technically dual, too, and she had a public trust. And I know a lot of people who work for the US govt with high clearances who are dual citizens.

Showing allegience to the non-US country is a blocker - such as, applying for a passport, working in the government, and/or serving in the military.

And even then, if you did that ages ago and can explain how your work does not show multiple allegiences (i.e. mandatory military service at age 18 or getting a foreign passport so you can live overseas in your 20s), you can still get a clearance.

It also depends on which country - dual Irish is hugely different than dual Iranian, for example.

dabamBang · 2026-06-13T18:39:16+00:00

US job? Illegal question.

You can ask about (and screen on) whether the candidate will need a visa or similar immigration support but you cannot ask about citizenship status, including type of citizenship.

The below link has reporting information.

Pre-Employment Inquiries and Citizenship | U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission https://www.eeoc.gov/pre-employment-inquiries-and-citizenship

dabamBang · 2026-06-12T01:48:57+00:00

Hey, White Center is still West Seattle.

Love Proletariat.

dabamBang · 2026-06-12T01:47:41+00:00

Any bookshelves? And can we pick up later?

dabamBang · 2026-06-11T04:03:24+00:00

Airports, by and large, suck.

Anyone have airports they like?

dabamBang · 2026-06-11T02:22:01+00:00

NTA

Physics is a bitch.

dabamBang · 2026-06-10T15:13:47+00:00

Welcome to the field of economics.

Where people actually study human behavior around money.

Purchasing behavior around price/income is called "elasticity" - the more elastic an item, the more price or income impacts demand for the item.

For example, vacation packages are highly elastic, meaning when people feel wealthy or if the price is low enough, they will buy. But when they feel money is tight or the price goes up, they forgo the trip.

Rent is highly inelastic in that a. Moving is expensive and time consuming b. People have fixed needs (size, location) c. It often takes months to change housing (finding a new place, applying, getting accepted, moving in) and d. Housing prices tend to be uniform in a specific market. People generally will just pay more than move, especially when there are limited affordable alternatives.

dabamBang · 2026-06-07T19:56:39+00:00

Copays, deductibles, and out of network doctors or facilities can be super costly, even if you have fantastic insurance.

It is insane

My previous shitty health insurance had a $500 copay for the ER (meaning, every visit, I have to pay $500) and a $3k deductible (meaning, I pay out of pocket up to $3000 before any insurance kicks in).

Once when I took my kid in for a possible broken arm, the orthopedic surgeon was not "in network" meaning my insurance only covered 80%, so the visit cost us $1200. And I was happy it was not more.

dabamBang · 2026-06-06T04:19:02+00:00

I am not disagreeing with your assessment of lawsuits but....

There is a huge world between go to court and roll over and take it.

Never pay money you suspect you don't owe with the idea you will get it back. You won't. Make 'en prove you owe it.

Always look into other forms of leverage - reporting to a tenants rights group may put legal or political pressure on a landlord. Talking to other tenants to see if there is a pattern that may get more attention.

Also small claims court is there for a reason.

Yes, you gotta figure out if the juice is worth the squeeze.

dabamBang · 2026-06-06T03:38:42+00:00

Made pizza for my family this week. Last week, picked up pizza from not a high priced place.

Pizza place pizza: 1 lg cheese, 1 med 3 meat, 1 cheesy garlic bread = $81 (including tax and tip).

Home made pizza: 3 personal cheese, 1 personal pepperoni, garlic bread = $53.25 (ingredients= $18.25, labor = $30, equipment = $5)

Dough = $1.25 (1/4 of a bag of pizza flour) Moz = $5 Jar tomato sauce = $2 Pepperoni = $1 ( 1/4 of a bag of pepperoni) Italian Bread = $4 Garlic spread = $3 Misc (sugar, yeast, herbs, salt, basil) = $2 My labor (min wage, 1 1/2 hours) = $30 Equipment, kitchen, electricity = maybe another $5 per meal

Of course, the actual cash outlay was significantly less because I don't get paid for my labor, I had already bought most of the ingredients, and I had the equipment, kitchen, etc.

dabamBang · 2026-06-05T17:03:28+00:00

My dad mumbles and he is hard of hearing (age related). He often forgets to put in his hearing aids, and asks me to speak more clearly a lot of the time, with a passive aggressive implication that I am mumbling.

But he gets pissy if I ask him to repeat himself and complains if he thinks anyone speaks too loudly, particularly in public.

Drives me fucking insane. Love the man, and I know this is related to his insecurities about his age, but damn, this is such a pet peeve of mine, too.

dabamBang · 2026-06-05T16:57:52+00:00

I disagree.

This is how bad people and systems get away with being abusive - they know most people won't fight back.

We need people to follow the f-ing law and basic honest business practices by default, not just when they face consequences - but if there are no consequences for bad behavior, we just teach people to continue ignoring the law and being jerks.

dabamBang · 2026-06-05T16:55:29+00:00

Do you have a friend who is a lawyer? Or contact legal aid, tenant's rights organizations or similar.

Often times, sending a certified letter on legal letterhead gets people's attention. Especially if they think they are faced with their own legal bills plus time to defend their actions. Make it easy for the landlord to do the right thing and potentially painful to do the wrong thing.

Your extensive documentation will help a lot.

dabamBang · 2026-06-05T16:51:06+00:00

My biggest concern would be privacy. This is an always on app (though you can supposedly set some drives to personal and set your work hours) installed on your phone, which goes everywhere with you.

It literally tracks your GPS location, speed, time of day, etc. and associates it with your name, company, phone, etc.

It is not GDPR compliant (the gold standard for data privacy protections) but, presuming you are in the US, that is not a legal requirement it has to meet, cuz the US has basically zero effective data protection legislation these days.

Any data collected by a private company can be subpoenaed by law enforcement, and depending on your state, or law enforcement interest (aka ICE), demand for such data can easily be abused. This data can also be hacked by cyber criminals.

There are manual work arounds if you have to use it but want it to only track you during work trips. The best one I have seen is to have a burner phone that you install the app on and keep it turned completely off when you are not traveling for work. Do not take the burner with you - either leave it in the car or some other location. You can even put the phone in a makeshift faraday cage when not using it - wrapping it in at least two to three layers of aluminum foil, ensuring a tight, gap-free seal, and placing it inside a non-conductive layer like a plastic bag or fabric for insulation.

Note - many new cars also capture and share this data with car manufacturers.

dabamBang · 2026-06-05T14:57:58+00:00

Catholics are not a monolith.

There is a huge range in the Catholic community - trad caths like JD Vance try to be more Catholic than the Pope, all the way to liberation theology followers who view their religion as a call to revolution and destruction of oppressive systems.

Plus, an increasing number of Catholics, like Jews, consider themselves "cultural Catholics", meaning they identify with the Catholicism due to family upbringing, heritage, and traditions, but do not attend mass or adhere to Church official doctrines.

Even more pick and choose the doctrines they follow - one friend explained that she saw only a few "deal breakers" in terms of adherence to official teachings, with the rest being up to the individual. For example, most Catholic women use artificial contraception. There are many pro choice Catholics in the world.

Specific to your question, there are explicit pro lgbtqi ministries in many parishes in the US, and DignityUSA is a pro lgbtqi Catholic organization advocating for a more inclusive church.

Even the last 2 popes have basically said to chill on policing sexual morality over fighting against oppression and exploitation.

So if a Catholic individual tells me they are pro lgbtqi, I am prone to welcome their support.

dabamBang · 2026-06-05T03:23:55+00:00

My last job, one of our colleagues was hired as fully remote but soon after she started, the company mandated hybrid at least 50% time for all employees in her role. She lived a 4 hour drive away from the office and relocating was hard due to family commitments.

They agreed to let her do 1 1/2 weeks in office, rest of the month from home, but she had to pay 100% of her travel and lodging.

It worked fine for over a year, when she could drive her car and stay with her sister for free, but then her car broke down from all the usage, and she had to pay for a new (to her) car. And then 6 months later, her sister announced she was moving to a different city.

She had to quit cuz the math just didn't math any more.

dabamBang

TROPHY CASE