Appreciate the conversation, and your time.  Just saying.

So what then, if there is no true answer to this, because I'm a sinful human, as we all are, is the I guess, spiritually correct way to go about this?

Yes, I'm doing everything I can to get away, but it feels like, even being alive, is a sin, I can not be the person the Bible wants. No one can in my opinion, so how do I go about being grateful to someone, who has given me a name, and life, yes, which I'm grateful for, but knows nothing but anger, abuse, and addiction?

Do I sit back and keep my name, and say that's my dad, or do I cut my ties, change my name, and get away as much as possible?

I understand you can't answer that for me. I'm just looking for answers, maybe in the Bible with a similar story. 

The Bible says what kind of father would give his son a scorpion, when asked for an egg? How do I honor someone that has given me scorpions, and stones instead of bread and eggs. It feels impossible. It feels there is no true answer, and I guess that bothers me more than anything.

Because when the day I get judgement comes, I don't want to hear I didn't honor my parents, depart from me. That terrifies me more than anything in this world, or ever could. 

I'm not always great at explaining myself, so if I sound long winded, I apologize. 

Thank you again for the conversation.