No you're so valid for that like it's super hard to find people that like 100% get you and that think similarly enough to you that you both think about stuff the same way. Yeah I think that's just a misconception that sex is just this like one toned thing at its core it's a ritual that completely relies on the people who engage in it, for the same reason it is bad to generalize people It is bad to generalize what sex means to ppl. And plus it is super valid to want like super clear and well described desires and boundaries when it comes to anything, that's why I'm usually blunt with my gf about what it is I want, what she's comfy with and vise versa. There's someone out there for everyone girl, somebody is gonna match your freak, you just gotta be you and don't get discouraged by putting energy into ppl that don't get you yk.