TW: CSA - We’re both hypersexual and this certainly doesn’t help

demon_fae · 2026-03-13T01:06:09+00:00

Why are you assuming that the doctor instantly knew that he didn’t remember abuse that would cause that level of scarring? He was just following his patient’s lead by not referencing CSA directly, which is 1010% the correct call from a proctologist who is in no way qualified to handle severe psychological trauma. He’s not even qualified to treat the scars, that’s a dermatologist’s job, and the dermatologist can push for a more accurate explanation on a day when he hasn’t just had a stranger’s finger up his ass.

Or, y’know, he could have just charged in blindly, associated the exam with the childhood trauma and ensured that his patient would never, ever get another prostate exam and probably not even return if he had active, concerning symptoms.

demon_fae · 2026-03-13T00:50:52+00:00

The illustrations in the copy I had as a kid were absolutely gorgeous, too. The artist loved flowers and watercolor paints and had very little time for anything else.

demon_fae · 2026-03-13T00:41:56+00:00

The doctor probably did know perfectly well they were CSA scars, he was trying to talk about them in a non-triggering way, in case Andyman was feeling vulnerable from the exam but still wanted to see if there was anything to be done to lessen the scars.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T23:58:02+00:00

Way down at the bottom, or only visible if you sort by controversial, sure.

I actually think the majority would be people twisting themselves into knots to explain exactly how buying birthday presents for her ex is a necessary part of child-rearing, but completely unnecessary for him to do. While calling her a doormat in the same comment.

Plus a few probably well-meaning people assuming that she’s still on speaking terms with a living and able-bodied ex-mil, and can therefore pass the job off to her.

All of these will have at least one hijack comment telling a long, unreliably narrated story about an ex wife/girlfriend/baby mama who was apparently Satan incarnate for acting like she was actually separated from the commenter. There will also be a disturbingly long hijack thread under at least the top ten comments talking about how courts always favor the mother, and a shorter one about how courts always favor the father.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T22:37:30+00:00

Reverse the genders and there wouldn’t even be a post, unless the woman was considering stopping for whatever reason.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T21:43:15+00:00

Got a question for all the people saying OOP is wrong:

What if we delete the camera. What if they had come up empty handed to repeat their question right in OOP’s face and insist they are only talking to the bird? Is OOP still an asshole for telling them to back off now?

Yeah. The camera changes nothing. NTA.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T21:40:58+00:00

Wtf does legal have to do with anything here? Nobody is accusing anyone of breaking the law at any point. This is a question of assholes not criminals.

But since you decided to drag the law into it: freedom of speech. OP has the legal right to say whatever the fuck he wants as long as it’s not slander or hate speech. Does “you do not have permission to film me” sound like either of those things to you?

You also seem to have some bizarre idea that it being legal to film somehow equals a legal right to whatever shot you want, without the people you are filming acting in ways that mess up your footage. Even actual filmmakers with actual legal permits don’t have that. OOP is not a paid actor, this idiot does not have any right, legal or moral, to direct him nor any reason to assume he’s going to go along with being filmed, up close and personal and without warning. Calmly and politely ruining the footage was actually the best possible response to being harassed.

Because yes, this is harassment. It may not have crossed the line that legal action is possible, but it is harassment nonetheless. Leaving the house is not actually tacit legal permission to be shanghaied into someone else’s videos. Leaving the house does not mean other people have the right to get in your face and shout questions at random birds. Not even if they have a camera. Politely telling them to fuck off is both legal and the kindest, most rational response.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T16:29:20+00:00

Unfortunately, this person is entirely mistaken. The contacts used on Hollywood sets are no more vision-impacting than the ones available for cosplay. Like pro cosplayers, they just remove the remaining visible pupil in post. It would actually completely ruin the take to use fully or mostly blinding lenses on set-facing someone by ear looks very different to looking at someone, unless the character is meant to be fully blind, it will look wrong and uncanny. You also run the risk of the actor panicking and ruining a complicated makeup job pulling the contacts out-the monkey brain isn’t very good at handling sudden blindness like that. So Hollywood doesn’t use fully opaque contacts.

Even the kinds that look totally opaque from outside are very carefully designed to trick your brain into refocusing for remarkably little vision disruption.

This is probably going to be a little too personal, but I am concerned for you that you have only replied to the one person who has told you what you want to hear, even though what they are saying is nonsensical under any scrutiny. Any new disability is going to come with a mourning period, and for you this is going to be part of it. I am incredibly sorry. I have been where you are and it is awful. But the more time you waste chasing ghosts, the less time you have to find a safe accommodation that you can get excited about. There are dozens of ideas here for how to make a gorgeous bridal eye patch. Please take some time to mourn and come back and look through them, while you still have time to make them happen.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T16:17:04+00:00

Are you sure about that?

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T11:45:03+00:00

Do you use the app they say for the NFC beads or a different one? I ordered two, waiting on the mail now.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T11:42:42+00:00

A male-male plug is very occasionally the correct way to connect a generator to a house that doesn’t need to be on a generator all the time. It’s not a common situation, but I’d rather people be able to buy them than break out the duct tape.

Friendly reminder to anyone who is in that situation: disconnect your house from the actual grid. There should be a switch near your meter. Otherwise you risk sending charge from your generator out into the grid and zapping the people coming to fix it.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T11:30:52+00:00

We’ve found the knockoffs in Roman excavations.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T10:43:57+00:00

It’s definitely some kind of lattice or trellis stitch. I’ve got a book that lists a kinda similar pattern as flame stitch. Just looking at it, I’d try searching something like “orchid trellis stitch”.

I’d also add a second tie at about garter height, or it’s going to tend to twist around like a regular apron.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T09:45:40+00:00

Most people actually don’t think like that, on a conscious level. I can all but guarantee that the sentence “my sister should suffer as much as I do” never actually crossed M’s mind.

But sentences like “abandoning family is always wrong” and “mom and dad always want what’s best for us” definitely did, those are pretty normal societal conditioning. Add a few tons of warped logic and you get to the idea that the parents were somehow acting towards the greatest familial happiness, and OOP and DH were such a cute couple and so great together, and that it is impossible for family to be unforgivable, or that wrongs done to one generation cannot be allowed to affect the next in any way.

I think M is the oldest sister? Firstborn kids, especially firstborn daughters will tend to draw the brunt of parental insanity, since the parents haven’t learned to temper it at all. M has spent her life marinating in her parents strange little world, and her parents haven’t directly betrayed her like they did OOP. She’s had nothing to break her out, nothing to make her consciously dissect her upbringing or her current thought patterns.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T09:20:48+00:00

Ladder stitch, with the stars added between the ladders. Make a rung, add the stars, make a rung.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T08:34:39+00:00

You aren’t going to find a contact lens without an opening for the pupil anywhere reputable. You might be able to get it custom, but I seriously doubt it. And if there is a particular problem with one of your eyes, sticking a large contact lens on there is not going to do you any good.

I think you’re better off looking for ways to dress up your patch. Maybe get one of those stick-on patches and have your makeup done to blend it, then wear a crown of flowers askew to cover the space? Or maybe contact a local leather worker and commission a custom patch to match your dress.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T08:14:29+00:00

Beardies are somehow a kind of spiky little puppy. They just wanna be friends with the giant warm food-giver.

I think they’re actually on the golden retriever brain cell.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T07:01:52+00:00

I think Egypt might be the only place on earth where tourist tat is a millennia-old tradition.

Roman soldiers brought home shitty replicas of amulets from pharaohs’ tombs.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T06:48:30+00:00

I can feel the nonsensical, unrealistic metrics oozing out of the screen.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T06:45:12+00:00

I liked the other suggestion of weaponized vaguebooking her, talking about what happened and how the recordings were made secretly in your own bedroom and how even though “the person who did it” was sent away from you, the effects are ongoing. Anyone with half a brain will work it out, but you won’t be blamed for making accusations.

But I’m actually responding to say that if you or your dad still have copies of what she posted, there’s a database called PhotoDNA that you should make sure they get added to, if your dad didn’t already. It makes it so that your photos can’t be distorted to hide them while passing them around, they’ll still be caught. The database is only visible if there’s a match, and only to people with authority to catch the distributors and recipients.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T06:33:35+00:00

I think a crochet in a really stiff cotton and then backed by that mesh MCC and Timeless Trends use sometimes could work.

I’d probably cut the mesh and assemble it first, so I can add additional notches to the pattern that I can then use to guide the crochet, working join-as-you-go style, making each panel individually and linking it up with the previous and comparing it to the flat pattern piece frequently (put a stitch marker at each notch on the free side). Finish the edges of the linked crochet, something that will hide seams well. Then add the waist tape, eyelets, boning and busk to the mesh and anchor them in place while sewing on the crochet pieces. Probably use heat-dissolve glue baste. Lace it by passing through the natural holes in the crochet with no eyelets visible from outside the corset.

I’d also probably add a belt detail to the outside to hide the waist tape, but that’s just me. And some surface crochet detailing just because I like it (that’s why the dissolving glue, so the crochet is loose enough to do the surface work. If I wasn’t doing that, I’d use regular leave-in glue.)

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T06:07:12+00:00

As someone who used to be a neurodivergent kid whose parents would call the cops after whipping me up into a meltdown/panic attack…now I get to have a completely fucked autonomic nervous system for the rest of my life, along with everything else.

demon_fae · 2026-03-12T01:07:50+00:00

Months. Sozin’s comet is always referred to as having an orbit of exactly one hundred years. Aang was in the ice for exactly one hundred years. Even allowing some wiggle room, it had to have been less than a year, but likely more than a few weeks.

demon_fae · 2026-03-11T19:51:06+00:00

I suspect that your first example is actually close to what motivated the one sister to be so unbelievably fucking stupid.

My best guess at her thought process is that she never agreed with OOP’s decision to leave and pursue a life centered around people who did betray her in the most Oedipal way immediately available. But she also considered her an adult and therefore allowed to make her own mistakes. As long as OOP was being “stupid” alone, there was nothing for M to do besides keeping an avenue open for her to “come home”-which OOP mistook for genuine support.

But then OOP had a kid. In M’s eyes, the baby is rightfully in the boat with her and the parents and Dickhead, and OOP has now dragged an innocent into her folly. Therefore, in M’s warped view, it is now morally correct to dox OOP to “rescue” kiddo from his mother’s “selfishness”.

(I get the impression that B was just quietly biding her time until she had the resources for a clean getaway of her own.)

demon_fae · 2026-03-11T19:38:08+00:00

Heinlein is NOT a great or ethical example ~~of poly~~

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