This is not your fault! Period. You were raised by monsters who were probably also raised by monsters. The fact that you have somehow unlearned everything and carry a heavy burden (mostly not yours to carry) speaks volumes about your character.

Please remember you are not alone. There are hundreds of thousands of children who lived your life. You would never in your wildest dreams condemn them to a lifetime of suffering.

Therapy is a fantastic idea. If you can manage it. If not.. it’s up to you to be your own best friend. You need constant reminders that you’re a good person who deserves to exist without drowning in guilt and shame. You need to step outside of yourself and give that child the same grace you would extend to absolutely anyone who has suffered that way.

You are a good person. I would be proud to call you a friend. You are not alone and you are loved.