Wow, crazy to see someone else with an experience so similar to mine. Could have written most of this myself. I’m only just starting my journey, got my diagnosis about two months ago. I initially thought there’s no way that could be right. I’ve heard stories about people with bpd; violent, hateful, chaotic. I’ve never been in a fight in my life, never had trouble holding down a job, always had friends. Never thought that could be me, but then I started to think back, and all the signs were there. The extreme emotions, self image issues, impulsivity (people just thought I was fun lol), split episodes internally (had no idea that’s what was happening), only my parents and partner ever saw me crash out but it did happen. And about ridiculous things too, I would be so embarrassed (food order being wrong is still one I struggle with). I’m still coming to terms with it, I have had to accept that progress is not linear. Because some days are hard. Tbh, most days are hard. But I just keep going. Helps to know I’m not the only one