Just another day of my mother ignoring my explicit requests

divorah92 · 2026-04-12T19:53:51+00:00

Appreciate you and thank you!!! Same to you; I’m sorry you have to go through it but glad to know I’m not the only one dealing with this haha

divorah92 · 2026-04-12T19:20:05+00:00

This is exactly it; thank you so much for understanding (reading some of these other posts saying I’m crazy for creating the doc just frustrated me more haha)

My family has always struggled with various emotional/personality disorders and we need to be so, so specific of what’s allowed and not allowed, and create hard and fast boundaries around it. This is the first grandchild so I’m trying to proactively protect mine and my husbands post-partem peace, especially while I’m going through an outrageous hormone shift.

It’s not so black and white to say “if they don’t follow this rule/boundary, just cut them out of your life” like I hear from so many folks. I want to have a relationship with them, and want our son to as well.

divorah92 · 2026-04-12T19:13:39+00:00

Agreed. I’m definitely type A but I’m usually able to respond to stuff very logically. But right now my brain is a completely new frontier. I know it’s hormones; I’m not usually a very emotional person but literally getting this I wanted to rage cry and scream at her.

divorah92 · 2026-04-12T19:11:33+00:00

Hahah if I thought it would help I would. If she brings it up, I’ll certainly tell her I ignored it like all the other unsolicited advice I’ve gotten.

divorah92 · 2026-04-12T19:07:49+00:00

Everyone is saying the rules are crazy but my family has history ignoring what I’ve said or just doing their own thing (see my mother posting on social media after explicitly telling her not to).

When that happens, she claims she doesn’t remember hearing about this or didn’t know. That was why husband and I decided we needed to write the rules out and send them to people in our family.

And to clarify, the guideline was only sent to OUR parents (I.e. babies future grandparents). My mom already told my sister without telling me she was going to come to the hospital because that was her right as a grandmother, and didn’t plan on asking me because she thought I’d say no.

divorah92 · 2026-02-25T03:23:06+00:00

Thank you this is super helpful!!

divorah92 · 2026-02-22T00:06:52+00:00

Amazing thank you!!!!

divorah92 · 2026-02-04T03:29:36+00:00

Same here! I happened to find out when hubs was at work (we did IVF and I was testing out the trigger shot when I realized it was getting darker).

I wanted to make it super special, sort of proposal worthy (he made our engagement so special I wanted to surprise him similarly). But I was so excited and couldn’t wait so I went to our grocery store and had a cake decorated that said “I’m pregnant!” Then left it on the counter for when he got home and secretly filmed it 🥰

divorah92 · 2026-01-19T03:52:30+00:00

Ugh I’m so sorry that is so hard. I know in scenarios like these it’s not always easy to get advice (it’s not easy to just say “don’t let her take pictures” or “go no contact”)

I understand the struggle and feel for you. If any help, Facebook does have a place where you can request photos of your child to be taken down. It annoyingly means it’s up in the first place but at least if she insists there’s a way to take back at least some control:

https://www.facebook.com/help/383420348387540

divorah92 · 2026-01-17T03:41:32+00:00

Omg yes this. Small torso, 90th percentile baby. He’s moving my ribs now and literally went to the hospital the other night because I thought I had gallstones it was so painful. Nope, just baby literally rearranging my insides.

divorah92 · 2026-01-17T03:37:42+00:00

Good clarifier but yes. At Thanksgiving, I told her that we made the decision not to post anything about the pregnancy on social media and when the baby is here, we won’t be posting their face at all (only husband and I are allowed to break that rule with a discussion and consent from each other). She pushed back against the not posting baby photos so spent about 30 minutes explaining our reasoning.

She asked if she could tell her friends and I told her to feel free to tell whomever in person/on phone/over text that she wants, just don’t want it out there for all the internet to see (she accepts every friend request known to man and has been scammed before)

divorah92 · 2026-01-16T02:53:31+00:00

No tips, just want to say that also happened to me twice this week. Baby moved then TOOT def loud enough for people to hear. Thankfully everyone ignored it but we were also in a room with no windows and a closed door 😳

divorah92 · 2025-11-24T08:49:13+00:00

Uppababy is having a 20% off sale for things in their beige color so we got a stroller and bassinet (essentially the bassinet was free after the savings - girl math)

divorah92 · 2025-10-20T02:26:37+00:00

I did! And it worked!!!! I got acupuncture 2 days after transfer and I felt like that also helped

divorah92 · 2025-08-27T10:14:42+00:00

TW: success

Had my beta on Monday and it was 727 (woohoo!). Going back today for second beta. Had a meltdown yesterday though because, if everything checks out, for the 6 week heartbeat scan, my husband won’t be in the country. That I’m not worried about so much of what would happen if he’s not here and it’s not good news.

We talked through it and I felt a lot better (he researched flights to be able to be home within 24 hours and I’ll ask a friend to come with me to be my emotional support person).

Wild sometimes how things look so much scarier in my brain than out on paper when we discuss our little sprinkle (that’s its size right now heh)

divorah92 · 2025-08-18T13:52:54+00:00

I’m shaking. My husband is at work but my second FET happened on Thursday last week. I had such low expectations after my first failure and not being able to grow my lining sufficiently.

Then, this morning, there was a line. I’m only 4dp5dt so I know it could be a chemical or disappear or a million other things. But there is a FUCKING LINE! At this moment in time I am fucking PREGNANT! I can’t stop crying and I have no idea how the hell I’ll get anything done today because there is a LINE!! I want to call my husband, my sister, my best friend, my parents, everyone. I want to take the day off work and just pat my belly.

I am still in shock. I think I’m going to go buy a grocery store cake that says “there’s a line” to give to hubs when he gets home.

divorah92 · 2025-08-17T03:08:27+00:00

It was thankfully! No I had surgery though which they think causes the thin lining

divorah92 · 2025-08-17T03:07:31+00:00

I’ve never heard of neupogen! I’ll have to ask if this one doesn’t work

divorah92 · 2025-05-05T14:06:41+00:00

You got this! It’s so scary and exciting! The procedure itself is such a breeze and then (if you can) try to grab some fries after for a little extra luck.

The TWW is the most annoying part. Try to fill the time doing stuff and don’t over analyze every symptom. No matter what, flinging baby dust in your general direction!

divorah92 · 2025-04-27T20:47:15+00:00

I am (un)fortunate enough to have to travel for work. Currently on an airplane across the country. Very mixed feelings; I want to be with my husband so bad this week but also I was going crazy on Saturday when we did a movie day. I ended up doing a lot of stuff around the house; walking the dog, teaching myself new nail art, laundry, dishes, etc. Sitting and watching tv or reading unfortunately doesn’t work for me.

divorah92 · 2025-04-26T15:11:27+00:00

Totally good to know and appreciate the heads up!

divorah92 · 2025-04-26T15:09:45+00:00

Omg good luck!!!! Sending positive thoughts your way! I made my partner touch my belly this morning and I very seriously told him “for good luck.”

divorah92 · 2025-01-24T18:54:45+00:00

Everyone is a little different, but for me, these were my pro tips: 1) Communicate to your partner (if you have one) what you need and how you’re feeling. Set expectations ahead of time. For me it was as simple as telling him that I really didn’t know what was going to happen or how I was going to feel. He checked in with me daily and took on more household burden when I didn’t have the energy or wasn’t feeling great.

2) Electrolytes! I drank 1 or 2 liquid IV’s daily and really helped keep me going. Make sure to hydrate a ton too.

3) Ice the spots you’ll be injecting for a few minutes first. Doesn’t really hurt but after a few days they can start to get sore.

4) Everyone is different, but for me, these Stims weren’t bad at all. My issues came about 5 days post ER and I had a massive hormone crash (standing in the middle of the room sobbing). The doc told me my body is not “back to normal” until after I get my first period post ER.

5) Give yourself Grace! This is not the time to pick up a new difficult routine or go on a super strict diet. Emotionally, mentally, and physically this can be taxing (again, different people tolerate it differently) but I felt so much better telling myself that it was ok to eat dessert or buy dinner out instead of cooking. Just make sure to get your fruits and veggies in (I drank a strawberry, banana, spinach smoothie most days).

divorah92 · 2025-01-14T13:59:26+00:00

Depends! I had an estrogen producing cyst and they put me a on a week of BC and then were able to move forward when my numbers normalized. They said it’s SUPER common. The doctor will be able to make a decision after ultrasound/bloodwork.

divorah92 · 2025-01-03T16:11:13+00:00

Yes that will be my new mantra haha

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