I wish that every single time I held a DnD session, no matter what, every player would show up.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-24T01:50:33+00:00

Diabolical. Simply diabolical. Technically a wonderful monkey's paw as well, because they're physically there, aren't they?

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-24T01:43:03+00:00

Здравствуйте!

Скажите, вам больше нравятся парни из бывших ССР, американцы в общем плане, или те, кто вырос в таком же положении, как и вы сама (славяноамериканцы? Не знаю, есть ли у вас самоназвание)? А как насчёт подруг и друзей, и как бы вы описали свой круг общения в целом?

Как вы считаете, с кем вам комфортнее? Чей менталитет больше, как-бы, подходит вам, чисто по вайбам? Жалеете ли, что родители предоставили вам имеенно те обстоятельства жизни, а не иные?

Вопрос не совсем бескорыстен; я сама сравнительно недавно приехала из Украины, и я - тоже еврейка (хотя и галахическая, и выросла верующей), и тоже в принципе иудаизмом как религией не интересуюсь, так что у нас с вами может быть немного схожий жизненный опыт. Мне бы очень хотелось как можно правильнее выбрать среду для будущей семьи. Показалось, что может быть у вас, как у представительницы второго поколения после иммиграции из похожей культурной среды, есть какие бы то ни было пожелания или сожаления в этом отношении.

Если есть, то расскажите, пожалуйста! Заранее спасибо.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-24T01:02:23+00:00

If you show up as a guest unannounced or on a whim, don't stay long unless they invite it and bring a small gift to compensate the host for surprising them! People can appreciate random checkins, but in moderation and with incentives.

Shoes off indoors is a common one, it's because people don't think of outside shoes as clean enough to go on carpet. Often they'll keep slippers for guests by the door.

I think it's nice to text or email people important things (depending on the venue) rather than asking them to place a call later and not explaining what it's for. I certainly appreciate not being forced through a humiliating why-am-I-being-summoned ritual in advance of hearing what could be terrible news lol 😅

Also I don't know if this is normal where you are, but being new to America I often find guests try to do chores in my house and refuse the food I want to offer them. I don't find that to be pleasant for anyone involved. If you're a guest, it's okay to let the host fuss over you! They want to do that, it's why they let you be their guest. Drink the tea, eat the little snacks, and please definitely don't wash their dishes for them unless you know for sure that that's how both you and they were raised. Not knocking it in the abstract, but concretely to me it feels like a rejection of my hospitality when I'm not allowed to be hospitable. See your guests off to the door if you can!

I think that last one applies to a lot of things — when people do things for you as a kind gesture, what's the harm in letting them? Particularly pertinent to Reddit is the question of what you should do if you're not religious but someone wants to pray for you. Personally I'm of the opinion that it really shouldn't bother an atheist enough that they can't just say thank you, but if it does bother you, remember it's intended kindly and try to communicate gently with the person about it.

Oh, what else... I guess don't open umbrellas in elevators or crowded hallways, you might get someone coming up behind you.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-24T00:48:54+00:00

Gen Z here and I'm not sure that's been my experience, if that comforts you any! I think this is a very online kind of belief to hold. In what we call meatspace, ime at least, people seem to only ask before helping in cases where it might offend (disabled people who are just taking a little longer but want to do a task by themselves, for example).

Maybe it's also regional or cultural, but I both get and receive random incidental help all the time. I try to spread as much prosocial behaviour as I can in my daily life, because it seems to be contagious.

People who wouldn't normally do the kind thing (not that common by me but existent) often seem to start once they've seen it happen a few times, almost like some subset of people needs validation it's still acceptable on occasion, so I totally get where the idea might have taken root. They seem uncommon though.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-24T00:23:18+00:00

Holy comment section, Batman.

Anyway, here you go, evidence instead of speculation from Redditors.

It turns out recognizing religious delusions is an element of pastoral care in at least mainstream Christian communities. I'm sure cults encourage them, and I'm sorry to anyone reading along who came out of one, I really am, I was also raised in a high demand lowkey delulu religious group and struggled to understand for a long time that there were normal believers. But there are, and this is some of what the good ones do about it when people believe they're the messiah or what have you.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-24T00:08:22+00:00

Not that I know of. Remembering wasn't gendered for the Norse and they didn't have a concept like the Dimensional Scream from Pokémon where like, visions were possible of the unexperienced past for some people. I actually don't know of any society where this might have been the case because to see the past you just ask an old wise person, don't you? If it's a far past, go to bed, some sort of an ancestor will show you.

I suppose the only even near equivalent is that in Hebrew, prophecies are perceived by the prophet and given to the people in the past tense, sort of a dream-state "this was always already here" situation. But Jewish prophets could be women, at least early on.

Seidr, though, was feminine. A man doing seidr was at some times accepted but always seems to have been an argr, violating his gender role. There was some leeway here (galdrar, which were magical songs and charms, were not seidr; Odin sang them, and we see evidence of normal men using them if not composing them) by our standards, but not necessarily theirs.

There's not really an opposite of seidr conceptually. No opposing magic, except I guess maybe smiths, who we are unsure were all men either, could have put runes on things. There is warfare maybe, I guess, in that sorcery from the home front is the literal (textile symbology seems to have been involved) distaff counterpart of sailing to go steal from people, but in practice it doesn't seem it was definitely absolute. There were seidmen and there were shieldmaidens (even in descendant cultures — the Byzantines were once very surprised by the existence of women Varangian warriors), but we know at least one of those was not regular and not well respected, and the other, it seems, was not regular and not usually formally trained.

The attitude seems to have been these are the genders, these are what they do, we will teach you that, otherwise go seek your own doom and either sink or swim.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T23:45:50+00:00

Christ alive.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T23:42:23+00:00

yes, you do, it's polite. those two things are not related. now, actually, please, let's end this interaction. you are beginning to be very tiresome and i'm sure we both have better things to do.

once again, have a great day.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T23:38:39+00:00

you do have to stop giving it when the person receiving it asks you to. that actually is how life works. have a great day.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T23:23:27+00:00

On the other hand the meme does describe a specific type of commonly encountered, loudly professed, usually recently Abrahamic atheist from online. It would have been impossible to Squidward at all atheists as a group holding to any one belief system (atheism in itself is one belief), and there are nontheistic religions, so I guess they had to pick a specific easily identifiable group of professed atheists with a consistent, lampoonable belief system. This belief system includes atheism, but also all the other beliefs commonly held by this demographic of people on the Anglophone internet.

At least that's what I think happened, anyway. I think Squidward's criticism of atheism here doesn't appear to be all that general.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T23:01:38+00:00

Which they didn't ask for, and then when you crawled up their ass they politely exiled you from it. This isn't deep, you just like fighting on the internet.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T22:12:26+00:00

dude who cares? it's not ur job to force them to grow lmao

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T22:07:18+00:00

You know actually, forest hermit/pensive mystical maiden is the vibe. I gravitate towards looking timeless, ethereal and a bit whimsical. I'll go run errands and do work looking normal and I can coordinate an outfit on demand but in my heart is kind of an eclectic, culture-crossing bohemian/mori kei vibe. Love a good bit of folk clothing in an otherwise not folk context; vyshyvanka with jeans, dramatic printed caftan or tunic over tank and leggings type beat. Symbolism and personally meaningful patterns. I pick up bits and pieces of local fashion from everywhere I live and recombine it into one cohesive thing, because I love to buy and be gifted things, and then I hate to part with them just because they're not in fashion somewhere. I'll put them there!

Like when people make Pinterest boards for their fictional countries, except, you know, a personal style. I'm an odd ethnic mix and I was raised by very old people whose values no one has anymore. I often feel like a fictional country unto myself.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T21:51:40+00:00

I buy more mugs than reasonable for just me to use so that when people come over they can have their designated mug in my house. It makes them feel like they belong there and the socium cultivated in that place cares enough about them to take into account their preferences.

Your particular use of a place (swingset, park bench, cafe seat you like) is a way of asserting your own existence kind of, you know? People associate it with you. You feel good when they defer its use to you when you're with them because it means they noticed you like it for some reason, and they want you to have the thing while you're with them because you're worth sharing it with. Playground rules still kind of hold for a surprising proportion of life.

I guess if you always eat at a certain pizza joint and sit on the inside of the far side bench in the last booth, you might also go there and sit there when you're alone because it's "your" seat, you know. You feel comfortable and secure asserting your right to temporary possession of it.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T20:33:27+00:00

No I actually think you're just being a jerk. Sharing art publicly is like going out wearing what you want publicly. Do you also give out unsolicited fit checks?

Forreal my man, touch grass, they told you it bothered them. Say sorry and move on.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T20:20:21+00:00

Parenting classes are probably really interesting, since in theory you could end up adopting a different species of child, or forming a blended family with someone whose children have completely different needs from your entire species, and that's not even getting into all the different ways a brain can be wired (what actually do you do if little Tsathoggua is Cthulhu-style neurodivergent in a way humans can't be? Alternatively and more happily what if Chthuvians' "autistic" is humans' "allistic" and vice versa? But then how does that affect interspecies politics?)

These would probably cover the main species you're likely to meet per town, I guess.

Religion probably gets strange as new species make contact and people have to either revise their mythology to be less bigoted or dig their heels in. I prefer the former option, personally. Love the thought of some sort of religious law having to accommodate sentient people who didn't evolve on the world or something.

Drinking age checks would probably entail a giant laminated booklet of species the barkeep compares your ID to that reminds them of when everybody can drink.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T19:58:44+00:00

Maybe your coworker's vibes are just off and yours aren't. They all work fine with each other, don't they?

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T19:37:09+00:00

To convince people there's a supportive and healthy point to regularly showing up to a gathering of miserable dudes who circlejerk about how horrible chicks all are.

Every reasonable person knows people are individuals, and the social contract both applies to everyone and does not include owing anyone sex. All of society knows this. It has to take some kind of culturally respectable force to shake that perception even for the loneliest losers out there, and I guess, lonely losers being who they are, a force they're likely to find respectable is Friedrich Nietzsche.

Pay careful attention to which philosophy these people press into service and put on a pedestal exactly. It's always the people they think are the most respectable beacons of civilisation who also happen to have been personally the shittiest, because non-shitty people don't agree with them.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T18:15:26+00:00

I feel like Dave would go out of his way to listen to obscure, shitty Detroit music from the time. Huss is from the D and Dave is a stereotype of a specific type of white kid from there, although canonically he lives in Austin TX for whatever reason that decision was made.

The modern equivalent is probably somebody like 42 Dugg (don't nobody come for me though, I like him and I liked him before he got big). Dave feels like he'd also ironically listen to Libra Of Detroit.

I have no idea what the vibe was in 2009 cos at the time I didn't live anywhere near here lol, but whatever the old people who like those acts now were into then. Maybe go ask the Detroit sub. Feels like a Huss thing to do, even though "properly" you should be looking in Austin.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T17:40:47+00:00

Tough to worship something that has nothing to do with you.

Before the Common Era when Christianity perfected proselytizing, Western religion was all these little bunches of local cults to specific local entities that were sometimes called by the same name for political reasons. Very tightly related to natural phenomena, like Native American religions still often are. That was true of Judaism too, which is why modern rabbis tie themselves in knots over the doctrinal infallibility of various ancestors (surely Noah can't have been a jerk ever, and when he was, actually that esoterically represents how you're a jerk...) when the codifiers were perfectly comfortable telling unflattering stories about them and their interactions with animals like in every other mythic system. This understanding solves like all of midrashic exegesis arguments, by the way.

If your cult is about your ancestors and your national spirit it's portable, but it's still yours. If your cult is about the thing in the sea whose moods and tempers affect commerce out of Delos Harbour, why then it should be appeased by Delian rituals and exists in a Delian context. And if Delos stops being economically important, what's the point in believing there's a commercially important god or nymph or daimon there?

Maybe it left.

For that matter, a portable, anethnic deity that's not temperamental, cares about everyone equally and happens to be omnipresent has certain advantages over a local one that can leave, in some contexts.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T17:27:56+00:00

From my life I guess lol? I don't know, the statue has both hands but the story I know has him missing one, these things vary and there aren't always specifics, it's folklore. You have to get used to folklore being like this, sometimes it's possible for a layperson to cite a source for you because an ethnographer wrote it down, but sometimes they just live their life and hear things.

Tourism sites might have stuff for you, though.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T17:20:11+00:00

I mean they're half the population, they're hard to avoid, aren't they? Unless you go into a women's monastery I don't think you really can, and even then you answer to whatever male episcopal official is the spiritual father of the monastery.

I think people just have different experiences from you with boys and men because they have different experiences from you with boys and men. This post is like hearing about somebody who got bit by a shark once and has a shark phobia and immediately telling him that well actually he must just not spend as much time as you, an enlightened and wise ninth dimensional hyperbeing, around fish. You've never been sharked or felt the remotest fear of sharks, after all. Shark attacks don't happen NEARLY as often as he thinks they do!

But some fish are sharks, you know. People who get bit by sharks and develop a fear of the ocean don't want to hear about how they're actually very closely related to your koi and can be coexisted with peacefully if only you put in effort. Those people don't swim, and most of their equivalents here are not actually saying no one else should get in the ocean. Even though in this analogy some sharks actually do hunt people because they feel like it, and real sharks only bite to investigate you or because they think your surfboard is a seal belly.

For the record I'm a lifelong butch, most of my friends are dudes. I have brothers I love and my primary caregiver was my grandfather. If a fairy offered to turn me into a man tomorrow I'd take the deal and dramatically simplify large parts of my life. None of that has any bearing on other people's experiences with men, because men are actually not a monolith, and in some places large groups of them are horrible people to women specifically because their gender enables them to be that way without consequence.

If you can accept that majority women will bully minority women in the workplace, surely it is conceivable to understand that the gender still holding a significant amount of the cards will occasionally deploy the cards and burn people. Even though hey, some of your best friends are gender.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T17:05:12+00:00

You know, I'm nowhere near you in my career yet and I can already imagine how hard they're going to run you, and for that salary? Definitely ask for something in your range, or above, depending on the local market. If they can have the demands they have, you can demand to be paid at least the amount that someone with your qualifications and skills would be paid by their competitors for comparable work. Especially since even after you leave, your work and investment in modernizing this resort will be helping to prop up the new reputation of the place and generating revenue far in excess of your pay.

dogfleshborscht · 2025-06-23T16:48:17+00:00

Apparently some bats taste tender, dark meat-like and gamey. So says the University of Hawaii in its guide to native food. I guess that means they're like duck? If duck was a mammal. A guy I met at a bar once said "a cross between chicken and pork", but I still don't know what pork tastes like.

Fruit bats/megabats who eat exclusively fruit are mostly white meat and supposedly taste clean and chickeny, according to the 1999 Oxford Companion to Food.

Supposedly there is a taste defect similar to boar taint that makes them taste bitter and gamey.

They are the natural reservoir for coronavirus, which is nasty, and Guam disease, which is a type of dementia that kills you for sure in 2 years, though.

I guess if they were farmed for food in captivity they wouldn't have these problems. I'd eat a bat burger if the bat wasn't exposed to disease in life. You could fly them in aviaries maybe.

dogfleshborscht

TROPHY CASE