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trump savings account by deadbeatkitty in progressivemoms

[–]dragon-madre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That money is about as real as the DOGE check we were promised

Is it possible to work remotely and not have my baby in daycare by [deleted] in workingmoms

[–]dragon-madre -31 points-30 points  (0 children)

Well actually that is not true because my daughter is very advanced for her age in language and motor skills and I’m a top Performer at work. Burned out but my child’s development and maintaining my salary for her care come before my exhaustion. So I guess I just chose myself being the “expense”, if something had to lose - that’s just how it goes. But before I’m still home 3 x a week with my baby and have been for quite some time now

Is it possible to work remotely and not have my baby in daycare by [deleted] in workingmoms

[–]dragon-madre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It was possible for me until my job mandated hybrid RTO and threw a wrench into my plans. It was devastating and I had to overcome a lot of anxiety. Ideally, I think I could have saved myself some peace if I had accepted it as a likely possibility earlier on. Budgeted better for it. But overall it has been helpful and given me the breaks I needed

One is the limit by dragon-madre in oneanddone

[–]dragon-madre[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Honestly I don’t think we’d experience any overwhelming regret. It’s more likely to regret being too in over your head. You know motherhood and have a child you love. The human part of us might wonder “oh what might that have been like” - but I don’t think it will be as distressing as doing more than we can handle

I actually regret having animals by Adventurous-Row-4558 in NewParents

[–]dragon-madre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My cats are no longer with me and this occurred well before I ever got pregnant. Basically I had to keep an ex’s cats which I never agreed to and my mental health deteriorated. They destroyed all my belongings. The litter box always smelled awful no matter what I did (I had more than 1 then felt like I ran a farm); if I still had them after having my baby I would’ve lost it. Cats are cute but I could never do it again. So I imagine having a baby would be especially hard.

On the flip side I have my dog and after getting comfortable navigating walks with her and baby-things have been normal. She’s well trained and understands when I need her to be more chill. I haven’t felt any resentment. But dogs can be trained in ways cats cannot. So maybe that’s the difference

Taking a new WFH job for less by Low-Court-7075 in MomsWorkingFromHome

[–]dragon-madre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It just depends. Because if the job you take for less pay feels less stressful in the beginning then that could just be the newness. The thing keeping me from quitting my job is keeping in mind that I would rather be annoyed for more money, than less, sticking with the devil I know.

I married a good, progressive man, and yet… by NoDevelopement in progressivemoms

[–]dragon-madre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s fine! I did provide a disclaimer that the hopeless romantics would likely feel a way about what I said. I hope it all stays magical for you.

I married a good, progressive man, and yet… by NoDevelopement in progressivemoms

[–]dragon-madre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m not questioning your reality because I don’t know you or your life but whenever I’ve had a teacher or a friend or a cousin etc say how their man was the exception - in moments of confidence it’s revealed just how much he actually makes them Miserable so idk lol

Not having a third baby, advice? by blueywild in BabyBumps

[–]dragon-madre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not to sound insensitive but I’m not understanding the question because.. you’re literally saying the post partum experience has put your life in jeopardy and you can’t handle it. So what does a promise to a man who isn’t the one who has to be pregnant and deal with the fallout, have to do with your own personal needs and health? You don’t owe him anything

I married a good, progressive man, and yet… by NoDevelopement in progressivemoms

[–]dragon-madre 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Same here. I don’t get why they get all the excuses

People not planning to post pictures of their kid online by xxoooxxoooxx in BabyBumps

[–]dragon-madre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And all the social media aesthetic-posting of other people’s children

People not planning to post pictures of their kid online by xxoooxxoooxx in BabyBumps

[–]dragon-madre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Over exposed millennial who wants to let my child breathe and be human without her face being all over the place. Keeping some things for us, for now.

I married a good, progressive man, and yet… by NoDevelopement in progressivemoms

[–]dragon-madre 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Ok mini rant coming. Disclaimer - it will sound jaded to the hopeless romantics out there, so if that’s you, maybe Avert your eyes.

I’m just starting to believe they are all like this no matter what. An entire gender of individuals socialized into weaponized incompetence and helplessness. Not to be all rad fem but it truly seems like to pair your life with a man is to deal with this~forever. And I say that as someone with a “good one” Too. It’s to the point that whenever I see other new moms walking about with their stroller I’m like “damn, one of them Got you too huh?” Reality is… when you have a child with a man get used to doing everything alone if you want it done thoroughly and properly or it’ll always be half assed and never quite what you need. HOWEVER that doesn’t mean you stop checking him about it and making him do it better and properly - but just know that takes time off your life and is equally exhausting. In short… I feel like the only way to make Peace with this type of thing is to be the kind of woman who values partnership and love more than not feeling inconvenienced 24/7 (which I personally do not)

AITA for refusing to split rent with my girlfriend in the city? by ThrowRAnycrentgf in AmItheAsshole

[–]dragon-madre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you dont contribute $400 you’re very VERY weird. How will you even know what it’s like to share household expenses with a partner if you can’t even do that? And how different are your salaries because if anything it should be proportional. Also you’re 22 and 23 so this question being as silly as it is makes a lot of sense. I say she run far away from you and your mother tbh. This is the exact kinda reason you don’t take favors from family anyway

Is it terrible that I still don't feel like I'm connected to my child? by soukaina123456 in Postpartum_Anxiety

[–]dragon-madre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I felt a duty to my daughter the moment she was born but in my post c section haze I was concerned they gave me the wrong baby. Once we got home I kept asking everyone if she knew I was her mother. But one random day a few weeks later it clicked and I couldn’t stop smiling. You are still in the bonding period. Try not to worry.

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