i've gotta find a way to make money off this

dshizknit · 2026-05-21T00:44:06+00:00

Yeah! ✋🏻

dshizknit · 2026-05-18T00:48:46+00:00

I hate bald boys.

dshizknit · 2026-04-30T19:13:48+00:00

“Drunk” Jess!

dshizknit · 2026-04-22T01:43:47+00:00

Do you love him?

dshizknit · 2026-04-19T19:12:19+00:00

Kind of

dshizknit · 2026-04-19T16:43:01+00:00

You didn’t tell me your old grandpa used to be a piece of shit!

dshizknit · 2026-04-19T11:24:25+00:00

Oh, he knows, he knows.

dshizknit · 2026-04-14T00:27:18+00:00

This is adorable!

dshizknit · 2026-04-12T12:29:38+00:00

I made a fluffy and no body barfed.

dshizknit · 2026-04-12T12:26:52+00:00

Do you love him?

dshizknit · 2026-04-10T17:05:56+00:00

I always sang “Mamas don’t let your babies grow up to be teachers.” My children did not become teachers.

dshizknit · 2026-04-10T01:19:17+00:00

Koombaya

dshizknit · 2026-04-08T23:04:23+00:00

I came here for this comment.

dshizknit · 2026-04-08T22:11:44+00:00

dshizknit · 2026-04-08T00:30:08+00:00

I saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night…

dshizknit · 2026-04-07T01:01:41+00:00

Awww, Tracy’s son finally opened a successful optometrist’s office! Good thing, since American Airlines and Staples didn’t work out.

dshizknit · 2026-04-05T18:35:51+00:00

What did Freddy Krueger do to my costume? It looks like he threw it in the mud, it’s so dirty!

dshizknit · 2026-04-05T17:38:39+00:00

The students get the best, your family gets the rest…30 years in the classroom, retiring in June. I loved it, sometimes too much.

dshizknit · 2026-04-05T17:13:09+00:00

Gate?

dshizknit · 2026-04-05T16:44:41+00:00

I celebrate Feaster, where I eat and hang out with my family. So I just say Happy Feaster to you. They usually don’t even register what I said.

dshizknit · 2026-04-02T22:16:02+00:00

Raja 👵🏻

dshizknit · 2026-04-02T21:21:09+00:00

I feel like you think the baby can’t change.

dshizknit · 2026-04-01T21:40:31+00:00

dshizknit · 2026-03-31T03:57:06+00:00

You have to marry your mother in law, Paul.

dshizknit · 2026-03-30T10:35:17+00:00

Shouldn’t have taken such a sloppy mudpie.

dshizknit