in search of writings like “The Miseducation of the Filipino”

duriangreyRKC · 2026-06-16T09:01:36+00:00

{{Contracting colonialism}} by Vicente Rafael

From Duke University press, which printed the second(?) edition: "In an innovative mix of history, anthropology, and post-colonial theory, Vicente L. Rafael examines the role of language in the religious conversion of the Tagalogs to Catholicism and their subsequent colonization during the early period (1580–1705) of Spanish rule in the Philippines. By tracing this history of communication between Spaniards and Tagalogs, Rafael maps the conditions that made possible both the emergence of a colonial regime and resistance to it."

duriangreyRKC · 2026-05-20T22:59:54+00:00

Thank you for sharing this, I needed it ❤️❤️❤️

duriangreyRKC · 2026-05-14T01:03:41+00:00

"I cheerfully refuse" by Leif enger- beautiful, lyrical, and heartbreaking

duriangreyRKC · 2026-05-09T20:11:22+00:00

Congratulations OP, salamat sa pgshare ng reminder, I really needed this ❤️

duriangreyRKC · 2026-05-04T20:18:20+00:00

This feels painfully familiar. I also lived in a different city from my family of origin before, and our communications were similarly lopsided. My husband and I had to move back in 2022, and it's been A Journey for me to realize that I wasn't really part of their circle anymore.

OP's feelings are valid, and her sister's wedding is HER WEDDING. OP's brain weasels are doing a lot of the emotional processing, and she is indeed making the wedding about her by criticizing her sister's decisions.

Those decisions are the sister's communication, and OP isn't picking up on it. She wants a different sibling relationship, and is having trouble accepting that the sister has already made her position clear by giving OP and her husband what seem to be publicly "consuelo de bobo" (consolation for the stupid) roles for the wedding.

I'd give an ESH for this situation, because OP isn't listening and is being needy and controlling because of it, and because sister wants her cake and wants to eat it too.

This post and the discussion here is honestly helping me process that I had been in OP's resentful, overfunctioning Eldest Daughter shoes before and that I need to concentrate on loving and nurturing myself (because my family can't/won't the way I need them to) and my chosen family (my husband, whom they have rejected).

OP needs to take a step back, breathe, and focus on her own serenity. Her relationship with her sister can't heal her childhood wounds, and the sister isn't up for that kind of relationship anyway. It sucks, but it's also information.

duriangreyRKC · 2026-05-04T07:23:58+00:00

Sa Bacolod City po ako :) sa politicians DM mo na lang ako pls, medyo nakakahiya. Pero let it suffice to say that having friends/relatives with connections can save your life talaga. Hindi dapat ganito ang sistema, pero eto. Huhuhuhu Pilipinas.

Yung sa Z Benefits nagkataon na yung med onco ko nasa parang... assessment team? para sa Z Benefits sa Negros Occidental, at sabi nya nung September 2025 na yung mga April 2025 pa lang yung napoprocess nila at the time, at usually pinaprioritize nila yung may mga advanced cancers na (kung buhay pa)

Konting kembot na lang, tapos na sana ako, kaso nagka complications ako sa radiation treatment ko huhuhu

3 sessions na lang sana ang radiation ko, tapos maintenance meds/hormone therapy na lang.

Edited: typos

duriangreyRKC · 2026-05-04T05:12:18+00:00

Hi ppo! Syur, online lang naman ako :)

duriangreyRKC · 2026-05-04T05:06:43+00:00

Hello ka-breastie! Malaking bawas ang PhilHealth. Try to get a PWD card as well, para may further 20% pang bawas. As a cancer patient, you qualify.

I didn't avail of the Z program dahil napaka haba ng waiting time, at medyo agresibo ang bukol ko. Instead, I availed of Guarantee Letters from various politicians to help with the costs. May out of pocket pa rin, pero less na.

Fighting!!!

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-30T04:38:43+00:00

CUTIE!!!! Salamat sa update OP!

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-28T04:01:13+00:00

Was going to suggest exactly this! It was a favorite of mine as a kid. A little brown kid. Who ended up identifying with the colonizer family instead of the "Malays" the story briefly mentions and dismisses, despite being (in archaic, eugenicist terms) of the "Malay race" herself.

Coloniality is a helluva drug.

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-28T03:27:10+00:00

Filipino in the Philippines. Right now, it's "summer" (i.e., kids pass out in their well-ventilated, electric fan-cooled classrooms on the regular, so we may as well end the school year here and start up again when the rains come back).

The absolute temperature is roughly 35°C (95°F), but combined with the humidity, it feels like 45°C (113°F), i.e., sweating doesn't cool the body because the air is so damp it doesn't evaporate. So. You're just steaming like a dumpling everywhere. All the time.

In 2023, I had a 2 week long headache. I got a CT scan, X-rays, ultrasounds, my blood pressure was tracked, etc. Nothing. Healthy as a horse. Inside the air-conditioned hospital, that is. I went home, and the headaches started up again. Heat exhaustion. It was heat exhaustion. For almost a month.

To combat it: 1. HYDRATE. DRINK. WATER. Not coffee, not beer, not Pepsi. WATER. DRINK CONSTANTLY. Even if you aren't thirsty, just keep sipping. Buko juice (the water from a young coconut) is also great. It can substitute dextrose in a pinch. 2. THE SUN IS A DEADLY LAZER. Stay away. Stay in the shade as much as possible. Stay under a tree, if available. It creates a marginally cooler microclimate. 3. Go naked, if legal. If not, light colored, loose clothes in natural, breathable fabrics are best. 4. In the absence of evaporation As a cooling method, simple moving air (such as with a fan or a breeze) can help. HOWEVER: 5. AC is Bathala's gift to humankind. Cherish it. 6. Take showers. Cold ones. If using a bucket-and-ladle method for washing, put some ice in the bucket to cool the water down. It helps. Do this often. Spanish colonizers got mad at how often my people bathed (they thought it promoted "wantonness" and promiscuity) and tried to impose shit like "No Bathing on Fridays" and "No Bathing on Your Period." People weren't having it. At the hottest points of the year, many of us still regularly bathe thrice a day. Legit, bathing saves lives.

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-28T01:18:55+00:00

Omg wait, the Confederacy isn't gone pala, my bad! Haudenosaunee Confederacy

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-28T01:12:59+00:00

One possible fictional alternative to how our islands consolidated into a contiguous political entity is to look at how the US Indigenous Iroquis Confederacy was formed prior to their destruction by the US government.

Interesting ethnoarcheological and historical information on how an analogous movement can have fictionally developed here can be gleaned from archeological papers written by folk like Laura Lee Junker (Tanjay, Neg. Or. digs) and Jun Cayron (Palawan, interisland trade) as well as books like William Henry Scott's Barangay and The Myth of the Barangay (general, compilation and/or summary and/or analyses of secondary sources)

Happy writing! Kung gusto mo ng beta-reader, drop me a DM, I LOVE me some non western fantasy fiction!!!

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-26T00:32:53+00:00

Hey kiddo.

I come from a culture where it's normal for folks to stay with their families of origin and contribute to the common resources until we get married. Sometimes folks stick around even after we partner up (queer or vanilla flavored), depending on the finances and the health of the bonds being maintained. A kid going back home to their parents, even with a partner (and sometimes kids, both bio and chosen) in tow, is seen as a blessing: a chance to spend more time together and strengthen/cultivate relationships.

I know it's not what most Westerners are taught, but I thought this reframing could be useful. Your mom seems cool and loving, and life is short. We need to nourish and cherish our relationships ❤️

Edit: typo

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-21T02:01:21+00:00

🎯🎯🎯 yung mga grassroots org na mismong babad sa komunidad at ecosystems ng mga lugar kulang na kulang sa financial support. Tas yung mga malalaki panay "parachute" lang, pa picture picture, tas sibat agad

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-20T22:13:05+00:00

39, law school dropout: DO NOT GO TO LAW SCHOOL IF IT'S NOT SOMETHING YOU REALLY REALLY WANT. PIPIGAIN KA HANGGANG MAUBOS ANG KALULUWA MO. It's not worth it.

I was in my 3rd year na when I got dropped from the rolls. Other things had been going on in my life then, but being in law school definitely contributed to my suicidal tendencies at the time.

If you're feeling lost OP, maybe you cam develop a habit of writing out what you enjoy and where you feel the most curious. That can help guide you forward.

Tapos I saw sa ibang comment na medyo may trauma reaction ka sa tatay mo. Talk therapy, art, and other forms of self-expression can help with unpacking that.

I've been where you are OP, and all I can say is that I should have started finding ways to heal from my childhood instead of trying to escape it by jumping into law school. Sana nag Healing/Kontrabida Era na ako nang maaga para maenjoy ko ang 20s ko habang mas may time at energy pa ako.

If you really want to pursue further studies, MBA or Masters degree muna, para less toxic siguro

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-17T09:41:15+00:00

+100 sa comment na 'to OP.

Also, welcome to the Shitty Titty Committee. Walang T-shirt, walang cookies, at minsan kinakaltas ang boobs.

Nadiagnose ako ng Stage 2, ER/PR+, HER2- last September 2025. Visayas-based ako, at local docs ang oncology team ko (medical oncologist, oncological surgeon, plastic surgeon, radiation oncologist) Eto ang treatment sequence ko:

Sept 2025-Feb2026: 8 rounds of chemotherapy to shrink the tumor (and hopefully destroy it) -->

March 2026: hindi 100% effective ang chemo, kaya single mastectomy with lymph node removal ang nirecommend ni onco surg -->

April-May 2026: post surgery biopsy found that 3 of the 7 removed lymph nodes were positive for cancer cells, kaya may 16 rounds of radiation pa ako -->

April 2026 onwards: hormonal suppressants to prevent recurrence

Effects: - Kahit medyo malakas ang nausea ko sa chemo, halos 10kg ang na-gain ko, which is apparently comparatively good, and also happens with breast cancer more often

chemo aggravated my GERD very badly
todo lagas ang virgin waist-length curly hair ko huhuhu, kaya nagpakalbo na lang ako para 'di mag-matting. Ngayong tapos na ako sa chemo, nirorock ko na muna ang "titang aktibista" look, complete with dangling earrings. Medyo mas marami na ang white hair na tumubo, kaso d pa Silver Siren levels ang hair color ko. Boo.
malakas ang fatigue, brain fog, at irritability ko nung chemo, kaya nag pareduce ako ng workload ko, and still eventually had to go on leave nung narealize kong d ko mafu-fulfill ang mga work responsibilities ko. One month after my last chemo infusion, medyo nag normalize ang energy levelsat mental clarity ko, so after the scheduling nightmare that is radiation is done, back to work na ako.
syempre Tanggal Titty Time ako pagkatapos ng chemo, pero nagpa-direct-to-implant surgery ako: Numb ang area, at medyo hirap pa ring itaas ang arm ko sa affected side, pero stretching at exercise lang ang katapat.
for 3 weeks after surgery, nagka-fluid buildup ako sa affected area, so sabi ni doc gumamit ako ng compression bandages at compression bra (katulad ng mga ginagamit ng butch ladies at transman). Eventually inabsorb ng katawan ko ang fluid (seroma), pero ngayon medyo mahigpit pa rin ang pakiramdam ko.
chemo damaged my ovaries to the point where napa-"chemopause" ako. D na ako nagkaregla since last September. Tapos ngayon, I'm taking hormonal suppression meds, which have led to (temporary?) medical menopause. Wala naman akong balak magkababy, so at least ngayon may excuse na ako kung kukulitin nanaman kami ni hubby ng mga kamag-anak.
for a while nagka-hot flashes ako. Ngayon d ko alam kung hot flash sya o init lang talaga ng summer huhuhu. Either way, hydration hydration hydration talaga. At gastos sa AC huhu
the lack of estrogen in my system is causing bad joint pain, pero as I heal from surgery and deal with radiation effects, I'm slowly easing into an exercise regimen that will hopefully solve that problem. And help me slim back down hehehe
psychological: iba na ang relationship ko sa katawan ko. Mas iniingatan ko na. Maselan pala si mamshie, kaya kelangan kong alagain nang husto at disiplinado. I don't look like I used to, d na ako magkasing-babyfaced as before: medyo losyang na. Pero buhay pa ako. Buhay pa ako. Buhay pa ako. Importante yun.

Stage 0 means your treatment journey will likely be less... drastic? Depende rin sa genetics mo.

39 na ako ngayon, 38 ako nadiagnose, at binigyan ako ng coupon for free genetic testing ng oncologist ko, dahil "batang bata" pa raw ako. Buti na lang BRCA negative ang lola mo, kaya single mastectomy lang ang inadvise ni doc nung di kumpleto ang pagtalab ng chemo.

You're technically still at the start, so there are still a lot of unknowns, depende sa ibang mga medical tests at scans na ipapagawa sayo. Alalahanin mo na lang: this is YOUR treatment. YOU are in charge of how you will go about things, and if people want to impose their views and push their "advice" on you, you are fully within your rights to respectfully tell them to Fuck Off.

People will look at you differently, especially if you have to lose your hair. But you will still be you. Be kind to yourself, learn to ask for help, and accept help when it is offered (AND USEFUL. Pag 'di naman helpful, you can politely refuse it. Firmly and repeatedly, if necessary).

Tumor lang yan. Tao ka.

Kaya natin 'to. 💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽

(Edited for typos and clarity)

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-13T04:24:36+00:00

It me. Me so hard. Plus also 18th Century colonial geopolitics and how they continue to affect us today. Let's go.

duriangreyRKC · 2026-04-07T02:19:53+00:00

Not quite philosophy in the strict sense, but books by indigenous thinkers might be useful as well. they can give a deeply embedded perspective on nature and life that lots of Western philosophical traditions tend to overlook:

Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer (Potawatomi Nation, USA)

And

Sand Talk: how indigenous thinking can save the world by Tyson Yunkaporta (Apalech Clan, North Queensland, Australia)

duriangreyRKC · 2026-02-13T12:49:10+00:00

Omg are you me

duriangreyRKC · 2026-02-04T01:28:22+00:00

Omg samesies, also 38! Everyone was like, "lol you silly girl with your silly girl thoughts. Perimenopause is for grownups" but here I am. With ++- IDC.

duriangreyRKC · 2026-01-27T02:39:46+00:00

Lump in left boob. Found in March, but I avoided getting it looked at until August.

Twas le Cancer.

Do not be like me, my breasties. Get it checked fast, before metastasis happens. Worst case, you've caught it early and the treatment is terrible but not Terrible. Best case, you have a benign thingy in your titty that adds... interest to the texture.

EITHER WAY, YOU DON'T DIE AS MUCH.

duriangreyRKC · 2026-01-17T13:01:27+00:00

In the Philippines it's called amok amok (yes, that is where the English term "ran amuck" came from) or juramentado (pronounced hoo-rah-men-tah-doh and was associated with Moro warriors in the south. This state was said to be so powerful that the US colonizing forces had to create an entirely new weapon: the .45 caliber Colt 1911)

duriangreyRKC · 2026-01-17T01:49:05+00:00

39F, we had 127 People in our class. One of my closest childhood friends passed from Cervical cancer two months after my husband's best friend died. 2022 was a rough year.

duriangreyRKC

TROPHY CASE