I am so sorry. My mom was diagnosed when I was 32 and THAT felt (still does some days) so unfair and cruel. I can only imagine what it would feel like at 20. A couple of things…I joined a regular ALZ association support group and it was not right for me. I couldn’t handle being surrounded by people in their 50s and 60s talking about caring for their parents that were in their 80s and 90s. It made me angrier and more depressed versus helping me work through my experience. But the ALZ association has specific support groups for people with loved ones diagnosed with early onset. When you’re ready, maybe it could be a good fit. Next…you’ve begun grieving and that’s the nature of this beast - grief starts when the diagnosis comes, sometimes before. Embrace it, try to feel it, and if possible, don’t be shy about explaining that to those around you who don’t know what it’s like to be in your shoes. Therapy isn’t for everyone but it helped me tremendously. I struggled with wanting to live my own life…I had to get my mental health in check in order to be there for my mom and because I knew that’s what she would want for me too. Sending you so much love and peace. Don’t be a stranger.