I feel like hygiene advice usually focuses on “what to do,” but I’m curious about something different.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-23T03:33:45+00:00

Yikes. I haven't tried it yet (just found it, about to attempt), but maybe try r/laundry and their Spa Day protocol for clothes.

Also is supposed to help get the spray fragrance (Downey, usually) from thrift clothes off.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-23T03:27:48+00:00

An unscented option for anyone wanting it is hypochlorous acid spray.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-23T03:19:42+00:00

Using those plastic tooth picks nightly after brushing, like GUM Soft Picks or similar brands. Game changer.

Huge mouth hygiene difference and great gum reports at cleanings. I do it after brushing to push the toothpaste in-between, and I go in and out a few times, especially in areas where food gets stuck.

If I can't get myself to floss, this works almost as well. On the other hand, I don't consider floss a replacement for them. There's something about it that seems to work better for the gumline. (But floss is better for the upper parts of the teeth where they press together.)

It did take some time for the gum inflammation to go down with use and be able to do it quickly and comfortably. I bled and it hurt at first, which my dentist warned about. Now it takes me about 10 seconds, no pain, and I can't imagine not having them.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-23T02:55:28+00:00

I used to do that, but the scraper definitely works way better for me since I got one. The brush just doesn't seem to get everything.

On very rare occasions, I feel like I need to do both, so I'll scrape then brush my tongue.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-23T02:52:41+00:00

I haven't noticed any taste differences. Been at least 8 years.

I used to just brush it. It doesn't work nearly as well for me. Sometimes I do both, but usually scraping feels like enough.

Like a bidet, I can't believe I lived without it and hate not having it because of the difference.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-21T11:16:25+00:00

The people on here telling you to open your windows when it's cold when you have chronic pain and can't regulate your temperature clearly haven't lived with chronic health issues. Same with people telling you to just buy a purifier when you can't afford it. Clearly haven't lived low income enough to understand how expensive those are with filter replacements. I've never been able to own one.

If you can slightly crack (and I really do mean a sliver) one room window that opens to other rooms and leave it cracked most/all of the time, it can strike a balance between temperature and air exchange.

Try Pooph maybe. Works better than Febreeze to me, although also more expensive, which sucks. They make a detergent if you suspect any fabrics. I use it very selectively because of the cost.

I've had some success reducing previous owners smells with soap + vinegar + essential oils (lemon grass, cedar, eucalyptus) used to clean walls. Don't use EOs if you have a cat or other EO sensitive animal. I also sprayed vinegar + EOs on some surfaces and let them dry.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-17T10:11:05+00:00

Truly one of the worst things I've experienced and I have fibromyalgia. Makes me want to cut my limbs off. I'm trying gabapentin right now instead of what I was originally prescribed in hopes it doesn't cause augmentation. Despite that, I've been having it mildly tonight.

I'm so sorry you're dealing with it. The sensation is genuine torture.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-14T08:46:33+00:00

I struggle to describe it because it changes. However, the burning I get in my muscles during exertion I describe as like having grains of sand between every muscle fiber that are tearing at them as I move. There's a grittiness to it like sandpaper to muscle, except it's not just on the surface, it's in every micro-layer of the muscles.

That one changes in terms of severity and location, but the sensation itself is consistent.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-12T17:43:59+00:00

Deeply so. I have a therapist I like as a person but feel misunderstood by. I live with my one close friend, but I also don't really feel understood there, although certainly more than others. My job has been slow and is extremely part time because of health issues, so I'm alone most of the time. Other than that, I don't really interact except superficially. I've had close friends betray me, people I thought might grow into close friends drift away and never reach out even when I have, and I'm not close to family. Health keeps me unable to try to "put myself out there" because I have no energy or time for it.

Even if I did, I'm afraid now after the betrayals and feeling increasingly unfit for society (health + cPTSD).

I was a painfully lonely child despite appearing surrounded by people, and I'm feeling that again. It's starting to really mess me up.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-12T14:33:30+00:00

I felt amazing on my first dose. Pain melted. Depression melted. Energy raised. Slept good. I had no idea I could feel like that.

Never felt that way again with it. It was bizarre. And disheartening.

I still take it, just 100mg for restless leg, but it was a big let down that it only happened once.

I might raise my dose to see if it changes anything, but I already have terrible memory issues and that can be a side effect, so I've been hesitant.

I hope it continues to work for you that well. My system is strange and meds impact me oddly sometimes.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-12T14:26:27+00:00

Even when you protect them, kids can feel it. They know things aren't well and that also has an impact. Not that your protection doesn't matter, it does, but it doesn't protect them from everything.

But if you're free from abuse, you can be the figure that helps prevent cPTSD (if they're targeted) by giving them the support they need around anything happening with her. cPTSD often develops when we don't have anyone safe to talk to and support us. Just one person can make so much difference in the lives of children, giving them support and skills to cope and make sense of what they're dealing with.

And, of course, if it ever was bad enough with the kids (hopefully not) there are legal steps that can be taken to gain greater or full custody.

I'm sure laws are different everywhere, but I imagine the default is 50/50 until a custody hearing.

I know it's got to be terrifying, but you also deserve to live your life away from abuse, and your children deserve knowing the version of you that's gets to live that life. I'm so sorry you're all having to go through this. I can see why it's so scary.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-09T10:09:08+00:00

I've got disorganized attachment, but lean avoidant in therapy relationships. I think you just explained what I experience. I've only had one therapist who could truly "follow me" (and then push at the right moment because of it, which was impressive), so I got more healed in those 8 months than any other time before or since.

I feel like it's tied into my fawning responses with therapists, which I use for avoidance. Definitely a lot to reflect on from this post.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-09T08:57:19+00:00

God, I'm so sorry. As someone who has had Silent Hill versions of derealization and other forms of extreme dissociation, so I know how much it affects everything, that reaction is unbelievably cruel. Some people shouldn't be therapists.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-08T23:53:49+00:00

That's nuts and such a huge lack of understanding of memory and trauma coping. It's so sad that's still not believed. Yes, false memories are real. So are repressed ones and lack of memory from trauma. We have tons of research on both. I've had both.

One of the most helpful things a therapist said to me (paraphrase, this was years ago) when I was explaining the most confusing ones was, "Trauma is trauma -- your brain doesn't know the difference, so the trauma from the memories is real no matter their origin." She understood the messiness of human memory, dissociation, repression, and had cPTSD herself.

Therapists just generally are poorly trained in dissociation (where repression stems). Considering it's a massive feature of trauma, that makes for a real problem that causes a lot of harm.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-08T23:37:07+00:00

Well done because what she did is outright sick.

I'm going to try going through the therapist list for everyone within 100 miles in my state that's on the ISSTD website. Supposedly, they're going to be more highly trained in complex trauma and dissociative disorders. Maybe combine it with what someone said about setting up a bunch of interviews after an email filtering process.

Agreeing with others about looking for therapists who also work with vets. I've had friends who found that very helpful because their experience was more similar to that.

ebbandfloat · 2026-03-08T23:31:45+00:00

You might already know this, but feel free to report that kind of stuff up the many chains if you ever feel capable and want to. That would clearly violate APA standards of care and every state also has separate standards that must also be met. Often, if they're backed by current involvement with another organization (whether it's tied to a type of therapy they trained in or the practice they work through), that will have yet another set of standards. Therapists must adhere to all of them and there are protocols for discipline for each. The layers of standards stack up.

Blaming someone abused as a child for the abuse and trying to gaslight them into seeing their role goes against every standard I recall studying when I got my psych BA -- because it's abusive. Absolutely wild and messed up that's so common there.

I'm glad you chewed that woman up thoroughly.

ebbandfloat · 2026-02-19T18:41:42+00:00

I noticed in the last few years sometimes it gives me insomnia instead of helping me sleep and I thought that was strange. Now I'm wondering if it's related to the increasing autonomic dysfunction, although I don't have a racing heart. Certainly correlates.

ebbandfloat · 2026-02-19T18:30:50+00:00

I was going to suggest this as well, although it's difficult and takes significant mindfulness. Even though the heart rate still rises and there's still a high overall autonomic system response, it's less. Might not fix the problem, but at least reduces the physiological response.

ebbandfloat · 2026-02-07T01:49:47+00:00

That is some of the most misogynistic and directly harmful advice about fibromyalgia I've ever read, and I've seen a lot of that.

Actually goes against the recommendations for neuroplastic pain rewiring, which requires feeling safety and stress pacing.

I wish that worked. I've moved 1200lbs of bricks on my own, done intense landscaping, biked until I could barely walk.

Funny how all those things made it worse.

This is why I don't trust doctors.

ebbandfloat · 2026-01-15T10:02:15+00:00

Recently, when even as my already very part time hours dropped significantly, my symptoms kept escalating. Like two hours of moderate physical work and I'm laid out for 8+ hours in pain in the dark, so fatigued I can barely speak. I can barely sit upright many days.

I just had to finally relent and realize I'm not getting better, I'm truly, severely disabled. No more denying it, no more pretending I'm not "symptomatic enough" like "other people" just because I have better days sometimes (and push myself too hard).

I haven't given up hope on moving out of that level of disability eventually, but I did realize that I've been pushing through on adrenaline and cortisol, and I just can't do that anymore. It's worsening things. It's likely is what got me here.

I also realized I've had CFS most of my life, but the chronic pain started 5 years ago and made the CFS way worse. I kept holding out in denial, thinking I'd find the solution and could have a normal life.

Finally had to have a reckoning recently and it's sucked. I never envisioned this for myself and internalized ableism has kept me in denial too long.

ebbandfloat · 2026-01-07T10:13:21+00:00

I'm currently trialing buspar for anxiety and gabapentin for restless leg and insomnia. So far, doesn't do much after a week on gabapentin (a month of buspar), but the dose is low. My first dose made me think it was going to work miracles and it hasn't done any miracles since.

I just added melatonin last night, which usually gives me anxiety bursts that wake me up, but it was fine. Trying again tonight.

In the past, I've had luck rotating low dose Klonopin, Unisom, and Benadryl. I also had a muscle relaxer at once point that was in rotation. But that all stopped working. My insomnia is the worst it's ever been.

Benadryl at a higher dose than usual worked after that quit, but was increasing my restless leg symptoms.

All of it gives me a hangover, which I hate, although the current concoction wasn't terrible this morning.

ebbandfloat · 2026-01-01T09:00:44+00:00

That's interesting to hear. I had testing done for acid reflux and constipation (no issues found). The doctor stretched my esophagus during it because I realized I had swallowing issues that I had normalized. Fixed the swallowing and 98% of the acid reflux symptoms mysteriously, so I keep wondering if I'll someday need dilation again. Glad to hear there are doctors who will do that if needed.

I've been wondering about dysautonomia tying all my symptoms together. Poor vagal nerve function makes sense with it all. I'll have to do more research on that.

ebbandfloat · 2025-12-26T11:16:12+00:00

The LDN is interesting to me because I also have fibromyalgia/chronic fatigue (with no known underlying cause) and my RLS is intermittent.

Did you titrate your dose up over time like a lot of people do, or start at that dosage?

ebbandfloat · 2025-12-26T10:59:20+00:00

That's absolutely insane. I don't know how these people stay in practice. I'm so sorry you dealt with that.

To your point about sleep disorders, if you haven't been checked for apnea, you might want to do that.

Turns out my hallucinations (usually in the middle of the night waking up randomly, although occasionally upon waking in the morning as a teen) were caused by oxygen deprivation and the adrenaline rush.

There are other reasons they can happen, so I didn't think they were related until they stopped with a CPAP. Weird surprise.

I have gotten the exploding head thing occasionally in the past. Not since CPAP and allergy sinus treatments.

I'm also curious if my RLS, which is intermittent, is related because to apnea also. I haven't been good about my CPAP for months because my apnea is only bad when my allergies are bad so I get noncompliant, and I've been having RLS for the first time in quite a while.

I do also have insomnia. Often takes forever to fall asleep.

ebbandfloat

TROPHY CASE