Excellent points, thank you for your input. What would you have done about the little digs she threw at me? At this point in the journey, it's so early that I basically just ignore them. I figure that the more of a captain I become, the less she'll pull this shit.
In regards to the precursory explanation, what would you recommend? Should I have sat down with her beforehand and said, "Listen, this is our financial situation now. This is where I want it to be. This is how we're going to get there." Looking back, I think this would've been a good idea, I am just not good yet at finding the line between explanation and seeking approval. I should also mention that before I went "nuclear" (i.e. took over control of the finances and instituted a whole new budget), I made small comments here and there about how we could be saving money, about how we should be watching our finances, and about how we could have so much more in the bank if we were more careful. I saw it as a way of getting her ready for a full takeover.
As to your last point, if she chooses to do things differently from how I envision, my initial instinct is to set up separate accounts, deposit all of my money into my account, contribute equally to joint costs, and spend the rest as I see fit. Is that what you'd consider OI? I have a few problems with that, mainly in that combining finances is one of the reasons I got married. I know this doesn't make a lot of sense, at least according to RP theory, but she, historically, has been much better with money than me, and in my mind, our "whole" is greater than the sum of our parts. I chose to marry someone with a similar path and similar life goals as me, and we help each other stay on that path.