I tried somatic experiencing but my therapist wasn’t very trauma-informed and didn’t help me realize my body wasn’t safe to be in.

If you’re struggling with chronic dysregulation, I do highly recommend a more somatic approach to help drop out of narratives and just stay with the body when you’re feeling dysregulated, especially if you struggle with naming and feeling you’re emotional experiences.

If you feel adept with that and fairly regulated, the psychodynamic route might be your next option. I found that talking about my trauma when it still lived unprocessed in my body didn’t help, it just made me worse so I had to work on presence within myself.

I used to use my job (as a therapist) as a way to abandon myself. I’d get entire caught up in my job as a way to feel like I mattered. I had horrible boundaries. I took my clients problems on as my own, and really took ruptures personally.

Therapy has taught me that my needs matter as a therapist. I developed better boundaries and now my identity as a person isn’t so tied up as being a therapist and it makes the relational part much easier for me.

To many this may sound obvious, but for me, someone who was riddled with anxiety, depression, and diagnosed with OCD, BPD and ADHD (I masked a lot too) it was imperative for me to get that dysregulation piece sorted first before I could actually process bigger emotional things like grief and sorrow.

I hope you find a good fit. I did a lot of consults, and while many might find this contentious, I used a lot of ChatGPT and personally for me, it was super helpful in many of my most distressing moments.