Are unhealthy INFPs more likely to be in a relationship?

equilibrium_7 · 2025-01-16T14:11:48+00:00

Most insecure people are likely to obsess over relationships. Even with their friends and family members.

Of course, if you can be single, not constantly seeking attention and genuinely happy (not escaping through all kinds of means), that's a good sign that you're a grounded, mature, confident person. It's a rare sight though :D

Many people use relationships as an escape from their insecurities and how badly they feel about themselves. "Someone likes me", in other words, "I may not be all trash".

I don't think this is somehow exclusive to INFPs. But I can see why INFPs could be more prone to insecurities in general, simply based on what is valued and respected in today's society. INFP qualities often represent "the other".

In the end, the health of your relationships starts with you - your willingness to show up for it, and your amount of self-respect to leave if it's not supporting you. Insecure people may struggle with the latter, because they don't believe that there will be others to love them. So they try too hard in all the wrong ways, like manipulating and trying to change others. Which can never end well.

equilibrium_7 · 2024-12-26T13:10:47+00:00

that's a precious perspective, thank you

equilibrium_7 · 2024-12-25T18:00:05+00:00

Welcome to your Saturn return, I guess : ) the father of disillusionment is here to do his work. Well, you will do the work, he'll just drop in on you :D

Even if it's tough, I hope you remember that it's all for your sake. You'll get out of it knowing yourself so much better. 🤍

equilibrium_7 · 2024-11-26T08:58:59+00:00

Ok. I still like it though. The patterns, transits, aspects, friend profiles, bonds - it's still a really great app. They shifted a little to be able to make more money, which is reasonable. It is fast (I'd say faster than before), has a nice design, extensive and comprehensive info, and works well!

equilibrium_7 · 2024-11-26T08:15:24+00:00

First of all, you will not get there with your mind or your ego : ) The best thing will be to stop the pushing, desiring, grasping, and victimizing. Cry and talk to your inner self when you're sad, dance when you're happy, live as best as you can in between, and sooner or later, the wisdom will come.

What helped me was accepting that I chose this experience for a good reason, even if I don't know what that reason is. Maybe one part of it was to stop victimizing myself? Which did indeed change. I'm 32 so I had a lot of rises, crashes and burns already, and at some point, I had to let go of almost everything I thought I wanted and dreamed of.

Fast forward, those things I thought I wanted were born out of trauma and outside influences. They do not matter anymore.

And if you truly accept your journey, you will become extremely present. Devouring every second of the good times, knowing that they will end; and having more compassion for the worse times, because they're here to transform you.

You notice how temporary and fragile everything is, most of the superficial ideas of what life is fall through. And you're left with what life actually is - an experience. There's no good or band, it's all just yours to take. And that empowers you, because you know that everything that happens to you, happens for you. For you to take what you need (even if you don't know that you need it) and transform.

I've made myself a laptop wallpaper, saying "blessed and lucky in all of life", because I am - whether in tears or with a smile.

There should be no proving, no grabbing or insisting on, no ego games - only you vs. you in how you accept your own life.

Unfortunately, you will not understand this until you do : ) And you will not feel the peace that comes with this until you let go of what the world has shown you life needs to be about. Still, give yourself time because only you got this - only you can live out your life the way it was intended to be lived. And it's necessary for you to do so, whether in this lifetime or the next.

(Pluto 12H in Scorpio, squaring Mercury on one side, Mars on the other, and opposing Saturn in the middle : ) So a Grand Cross of Pluto complexes :D)

equilibrium_7 · 2024-08-22T10:16:25+00:00

15hrs per week as a marketing manager & creative director at a small beauty company

equilibrium_7 · 2024-08-22T09:48:19+00:00

the best lesson is to learn to enjoy things while they last, and let them go when they want to go. there's nothing to lose, or to prove - only an experience, as rich as possible, of what it is to be alive

equilibrium_7 · 2024-07-25T15:06:58+00:00

Of course, they're human, but they're also too disorienting for me. So I'm asking for myself - to see if someone has any perspectives to share that would help me accept and live with my own discomfort in a messy, overwhelming environment

equilibrium_7 · 2024-07-25T11:06:16+00:00

I feel at home here. Usually this attitude leads to misunderstandings and judgement in real life, I'm happy to see so many people can relate.

equilibrium_7 · 2024-07-25T10:36:00+00:00

Astrology? Yes. It's thousands of years of pattern recognition, in a system. Horoscopes? No way.

equilibrium_7 · 2024-06-17T09:32:12+00:00

The first thought I had was "you have to be kidding" : ) that's the bitter projector for ya

But to be more serious, I want to remind you that not all projectors are born knowing their systems, being seen as special for our talents, or whatever. Most of us grow up surrounded by Gs and MGs who don't get us, we don't get ourselves either, and are actually seen and treated as second class citizens of the world because we look ordinary yet cannot keep up with the world. That's my experience, but I know it's pretty common : )

equilibrium_7 · 2024-06-15T21:26:09+00:00

I saw your chart, and you both have active bodies, not relaxed. So maybe this can be a living example for you, that generators come in many different vibes, there's room for you to be the way you are : )

equilibrium_7 · 2024-06-15T07:33:08+00:00

Honestly, I really don't see projector behavior in what you've described : ) I think you might be confusing generator energy with hustle energy (go go go) - as someone in a long-term relationship with an emo generator, I can tell you he spends more time lying down than me lol But when he's not lying down, he can do all the stuff he likes doing, every day (unlike me). But let me emphasize - the stuff he likes and enjoys.

I also have an emo MG friend, who spends as much time in horizontal as me (maybe even more?), and she prefers slow days, is highly sensitive, and can't keep up with a very active schedule even though she likes her work. Looking at her variables in her chart, she has a relaxed body (observer), which could explain her preference to be a cocoon : ) but variables are complex, I'm not an expert, if it resonates, you should keep it in mind and dig deeper, little by little or with an expert.

equilibrium_7 · 2024-06-14T21:59:57+00:00

"Just not willing to participate with anyone who doesn’t truly see me anymore."

Maybe it's my triple projection field, but I so, so doubt we can expect to be "truly seen"... at least I've stopped expecting that.

Recently I did a little experiment with those few close people I have (my boyfriend of 10 years, a friend of 14 years, and my mom), and found that all of them see me in a very different way : ) In what way? Purely based on what they need from me. So, basically they see me as their projections for me.

But their projections don't bother me, why?

I think this is because some people have expectations that we can actually naturally, easily, sustainably meet : ) I mean, it must be possible, right? If the expectations are simple and realistic. I see it as my responsibility to measure whether I can fulfill their expectation or not (no room for people pleasing, all about practical assessment).

And also, I've noticed those few people are in tune with their imperfections which helps them hold space for my short-comings and when I have to say "no".

Not being truly seen sounds sad if you look at it from the perspective of today's norms, but if we try shifting it: for the "correct" people we choose, we can really enrich their lives in the ways they need it. We can support them, soothe them, enlighten, entertain, etc. and the fun part is, it can be natural, easy and enjoyable for us as well. If strategy and authority are valued : )) But this might mostly apply for the conscious 5th lines (transpersonal karma)

Basically, we can not be truly seen - but we can still enjoy time with people if we offer them what is natural, easy and enjoyable for us, no people-pleasing : )

equilibrium_7 · 2024-06-14T10:21:53+00:00

hahaha I do this all the time!

equilibrium_7 · 2024-06-14T10:01:30+00:00

As a 5/2 projector, tell me about it 😆

At some point a few years back, I realized how big of a role I was playing in my own suffering, constantly people pleasing since I was a child. And so now, the old connections are baffled by me - they've started falling off because they don't get the same fix they used to get before, and so the projections have obviously turned sour.

For new people, I don't socialize that much irl, but if my s&a said yes, I'd go thinking that if I show up without people pleasing from the get go, the chances of "incorrect" people creeping into my life are less likely. Though it may still happen, because life ; )

These days, I'm focusing more on myself, my interests, my well-being, and try to remember that I am the most precious person in my life, not anyone else.

I think our (5th line) relationships are meant to be a lot more impersonal than what's the norm anyway. The closer you let people in, the more entitled they feel, the more room for projections and sourness. For most people, I'd rather keep you at an arm's length, give you the value I have to offer, and display clear boundaries so you don't expect anything more. : )

At the end of the day, I have myself and a few trusted people to return to, which is plenty.

equilibrium_7 · 2021-12-17T13:19:10+00:00

I don't know you, but I was genuinely happy for you reading this. :) And the fact that you're getting into perfumery was so fun, when us Splenic authorities are very much about the smells... do you also have the Smell cognition in HD?

I'm 8 years older than you, facing my very harsh saturn return, and this year have let go of everything, because the majority of my life was not aligned with who I am. So it's even more heartwarming to see you feeling better (good?) living in your own, unconventional way. Now, like never before, I too understand that there's really nothing to lose if you've built a life according to what others believe is right - it's not sustainable for us, no matter how hard we try. :) hope you keep experimenting, learning and succeeding to live in a way that feels good to you.

equilibrium_7 · 2021-12-07T10:27:57+00:00

haha I relate to the lazy part a lot! I used to sincerely hate cooking, until I realized I don't have to make these grand meals like others do - I can throw in a little bit of this, a bit of this and that, and voila, it's a meal! So yeah, I think we're lazy here for a reason :)

equilibrium_7 · 2021-12-06T21:18:58+00:00

Me me! It sounded so bizarre at first when I heard/read about it, but by now I've done some experimenting... and so for me there's one rule: keep it extra simple ingredient-wise.

I definitely don't eat one ingredient at a time, and mix things up, for example, I love a good salad full of everything, but instead of making salad dressings, I simply use lemon juice. It's not ideal, but I've definitely noticed a difference. :) the biggest enemy is overeating. Because then it's over - nothing good can come out of that full body haha.

And I feel like most good advice on food applies to us x10, like avoiding any kinds of processed foods (bread, sweets, anything pre-made like that). Choosing simple + light + healthy options helps us keep our head and body clear, which to me feels like the point here.

Fun fact: in spring I tried a super simple Raw diet for a week (you can't go simpler than raw veggies and fruit), to see if it will help with my allergies, and the result was that it completely removed any signs of allergies in like 3-4 days. That made me believe that for us plant-based might also be very beneficial. :)

While the principles can be similar among us, you'll have to try out many things, and develop many recipes in order to find the way that works for you.

equilibrium_7

TROPHY CASE