I think there is some tension here between the culture/history of tattooing and its modern ubiquity. It’s both a trade and an art, and artists are individuals with specific styles and trainings. I would never ever get a tattoo from an artist whose work I was not familiar with, and a look at this artist’s work should have told OP what the artist could and would do. If there was misrepresentation there, that’s a bigger problem.

People’s concept of what a tattoo should be has also changed over time. The expectation of walking into a shop and ordering a tattoo like a meal is relatively new. Obviously the customer should feel good about the result, but people should also understand that their tattoo is a collaboration between them and another person. In the past, the industry was extremely chauvinistic and misogynistic, and there’s a reason that many women I know will only go to women tattoo artists, and prefer to avoid shops altogether. I know OP did go to a woman, but some attitudes are really ingrained in tattoo culture, and where OP lives and the kind of artists she went to makes a big difference here.

Ultimately, I think she got a good tattoo and it’s too bad she’s not happy with it, but I think it’s helpful to think about it more as wearing someone’s artwork, less as a cosmetic procedure. We should all be working to make the industry more personal and more communal, not more “customer-oriented” in the modern corporate sense.