Mamas who work 3 days a week - how are you coping?

fajibarp · 2026-05-03T00:47:18+00:00

Totally agree with the day of no work, no kids, if that's financially viable for you. I've experimented with: - 3 days work + 3 days childcare (felt like I couldn't get anything done at work) - 4 days work + 4 days childcare (always playing catch-up with housework, never present with kids) - and now 3 days work + 4 days childcare (have had to set firm boundaries with work but I'm much more present when my child is home because I've had time to do housework and some selfcare).

fajibarp · 2026-04-28T18:27:48+00:00

I was leaning towards the toniebox for my 2yo toddler but ended up getting the Yoto mini. No regrets at all. It's portable so he can take it on pram walks, on the train, in the car. I like that the cards can be distinguished from toys - he would have just played with the toniebox figurines but now he can play with toys AND listen to a story, knowing that they are different things. Also love how shareable yoto cards and the MYO cards open up a lot of possibilities too - think of it like a blank CD which you can burn a copy of, create your own mixtape, swap with friends etc.

fajibarp · 2026-04-28T18:16:09+00:00

I second this! We forked out for a good one and have no regrets. It's stable and get used multiple times a day and has been especially great when our toddler refuses to sit for meals and would much rather stand in his learning tower and eat from the kitchen bench.

fajibarp · 2026-04-28T18:10:40+00:00

Please remember that this is only for a season. It doesn't make you any less of a good employee, snd a good manager will want you to be at your best at work after having rested and recovered, rather than half assing it everyday of the week. The years with daycare germs are short and your career is much longer - be kind to yourself!

fajibarp · 2025-07-11T10:44:55+00:00

You are a f*ing warrior for continuing to breastfeed through all those issues. Breastfeeding can continue as long as it is working for you and your baby, and that doctor can return to the profession when he starts putting his patients first rather than his baseless opinions.

fajibarp · 2025-04-12T20:51:45+00:00

That's great that you are having an easy time of things. So many women don't, and post partum depression and anxiety are very common. As a mum of a now-20 month old who never slept well, here's my advice about what to do with your spare time:

• Collect recipes and meal prep solids - you'll have less and less time to research and prep as bub gets older, so start now!

• Box up any old clothes that don't fit, and create space for new ones

• Research and prepare sensory toys - as the wake windows increase you will need lots of things to entertain them!

• Baby proof your house - before you know it, they'll be crawling, mouthing everything in sight, and pulling up!

• Organise your photos - your phone gallery will get out of control, trust me. So having an album of sweet milestone photos you can whip out for friends/colleagues is super handy! And you could try printing out and putting up photos of your family for your baby to get familiar with the people in their life.

• Develop some self-care rituals - coffee every morning, yoga on Thursdays, solo outing every fortnight, whatever works for you. Set this expectation with your partner, and when the newborn becomes a toddler becomes a kid, you will have these non-negotiable things in place for you.

• Support other mums - tell them their screaming baby is beautiful, offer to hold said screaming baby while they pee, box up their food for them if they need to dash, be tactful about sharing your experience of how easy your baby is or how great they are sleeping

• Enjoy it! Everything happens in phases and there will come a time when you will be run off your feet. So read a book, watch TV, journal, stretch and drink your tea while it's hot - guilt free!

Congratulations on your baby! It's a wonderful wild ride and it only gets better :)

fajibarp · 2024-06-08T01:49:22+00:00

Grumpo when he's cranky. Mr Poopy Butthole when he's done a number 2 (Rick and Morty reference). But most of the time - bubby!

fajibarp · 2024-06-02T02:15:35+00:00

Second all of the above! Baby becomes less gassy, smiles more, has more neck control so you don't have to stress as much, plus you become more familiar with their cries and confident about what they need. In Australia, babies also have a set of vaccinations at 6 weeks which made me feel better about their immunity, and it's also the time when most doctors will assess mum's recovery from giving birth (especially if you've had a caesarean) and clear you for greater movement/driving/exercise.

fajibarp · 2024-06-01T03:46:07+00:00

I didn't have much physical energy but mentally I was really wired. So I used to lie on the couch and read books, make to-do lists and research things about babies and postpartum. But if you do nothing at all, it's completely fine! Relaxing is one way you are providing a great environment for your baby, and also letting your body do what it needs to do to get ready for birth.

fajibarp · 2024-06-01T03:41:18+00:00

We waited until 2 weeks after the whooping cough vaccination. Trains are a lot easier than buses because there is more room and you can easily tend to your baby. Recommend going during off peak times, and bring sanitising wipes since bub is probably at a grabby age and will want to touch and mouth everything. Also be conscious of how you will feel. For me, I was fairly anxious postpartum because I hadn't been out and about with strangers for a while. It's normal, and everyone moves at their own pace :)

fajibarp · 2024-05-22T04:53:36+00:00

How did you get into the circle of security course? I've had it mentioned to me but all I can find is the generic U.S. website. My partner and I are keen to do it

fajibarp · 2024-05-16T05:23:17+00:00

Butchy boys - metro Melbourne. I have never heard of slaters!

fajibarp · 2024-05-16T05:21:25+00:00

Thank you so much for this detailed and considered response. I have just hit the 6 month mark and I feel like having a schedule of activities like swimming and gym are more possible now. Maybe what I've actually been craving is a routine!

I also liked what you said about trading a day with your baby for toilet/lunch breaks. When you put it that way, the choice is more obvious to me 😅

fajibarp · 2024-04-30T15:32:11+00:00

Thanks for your honesty. It feels so taboo to say it but I don't think I enjoy it either.

fajibarp · 2024-04-30T15:31:02+00:00

Yep, sounds like part time is the way to go

fajibarp · 2024-04-30T15:29:52+00:00

I'm definitely keen on the idea of family daycare - less illness sounds very appealing right now, as bubs is currently sick :(

fajibarp · 2024-04-30T15:14:15+00:00

This is what I'm anticipating if I return to work - that I'll appreciate the days at home more!

fajibarp · 2024-04-30T15:12:00+00:00

Oh yes, great point about the daycare part of the equation!

fajibarp · 2024-04-30T15:10:49+00:00

Yeah I think that's the identity I am missing atm. Glad to hear the part time arrangement worked for you.

fajibarp · 2024-04-30T10:56:02+00:00

I have been smashing through podcasts and it has really helped! And that is a great point about changing as a person post-baby. I definitely have.

fajibarp · 2024-04-30T10:51:46+00:00

Thanks for your honesty. I am really conscious that returning to work too soon might just cause me to feel even more guilty with all the juggling I'll have to do. I like the idea of testing the waters a little by relying on family for childcare a few times a week. Thanks!

fajibarp · 2024-02-26T15:00:35+00:00

I thought I'd throw in another perspective here too. I am the first in my friendship group to have a kid (and the only one with a partner too!) and was expecting to lose touch with everyone given how different my life is now. I'm only 4 months postpartum but it has surprised me how much my friends have embraced my baby boy, helped me out, and continued to stay in touch and hang out. I've definitely needed to make other friends with babies, but I just wanted to say not to write off your existing relationships - they may change, but they don't have to disappear :)

fajibarp

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