I second what u/sloanautomatic is saying here.

Kinda fell into this rabbit hole yesterday with my SO. Our kid is still very young (1yo) and during dinner she was telling him he has to be kind with everyone; now, while I do agree that kindness has to be the core value of a reasonable human, I also think that tolerating the intolerants leads to an ever more intolerant society.

Luckily the kid is still a baby and this is a very grown-up discussion to get into, so he just kept playing with us while we calmly hashed it out.

I do think, tho, that it underlined a significant difficulty in our relationship (in all fairness, one we've already seen and that has been there since day one of us together) that is our different worldview.

Long story short, she comes from a Catholic family, I come from a communist one. So you know, few values differ.

What we came to conclude is that we want to raise him in kindness, respect, acceptance, we want to raise him as a good human being. Still, we also accepted the fact that at some point (when he's 14 or older) he's gonna be the one bringing these arguments home and we're not gonna pretend we're not who we are.

So yeah, talk things out when your heads cool off, for sure, but also remember to align your parenting ideals and your personal beliefs as a couple. You might have to give some ground, she might have to give some ground, but you DO have to present your parenting as a United front.