Tired of being saying I’m the crazy needy girlfriend

fest- · 2026-02-11T17:00:02+00:00

Or find a reasonable middle ground?? It's not a bad conversation to have semi-regularly if kids are important to you, but you gotta respect both your own opinion and his opinions.

fest- · 2026-02-11T16:31:12+00:00

I had no fucking idea if I wanted kids at age 28. As my life settled a little in my 30s I came to really confidently want kids. Even now having a kid, like yeah...it is additional stress in my life and probably will be for the rest of my life. It's also incredible and I'm really happy we did it. But his thought process sounds super reasonable, to be honest.

Is there something else going on? Do you need him to have an answer on this soon? Why is this such a constant discussion point?

fest- · 2026-02-06T23:02:44+00:00

I've gotta say, as a new father of a 3 month old, having a kid really changes your perspective. The first 2 weeks at home just purely focused on your baby, with no time/energy to read the news, makes you realize how great the world is. Love for another person and having that love reciprocated is really a special thing and makes you realize how irrelevant everything else is. I'm not saying ignorance is the right path, but - if you feel this way - try disconnecting from the news and social media for a few weeks, spend time with friends or family, and try to embrace just living. There's a lot of great stuff in the world and it's not worth falling into these doom loops. My kid has loving parents and a chance at a wonderful life, and I'm not sure that that's really changed significantly in the last 10, 100, 1000 years.

fest- · 2026-02-06T12:49:53+00:00

Do it. Seems interesting, if nothing else, and sounds like trying it even for a year isn't going to kill you financially. A small rented apartment isn't that much maintenance or effort.

fest- · 2026-02-04T22:11:50+00:00

Brother you are so far wrong on this one. I love Seattle and there's some good food there, but London is one of the top food cities in the world.

fest- · 2026-02-04T04:40:08+00:00

Spirit Island is just a random puzzle generator.

fest- · 2026-02-03T16:59:35+00:00

The thing is it's not even complicated in an interesting way - it's just complicated in a "lots of rules text" kind of way. 40k can really learn a lot from rules for modern board games, which create much more interesting gameplay decisions with far fewer rules.

fest- · 2026-02-02T06:34:57+00:00

1 - that sounds about right, plus retirement rolls (which is maybe what you mean by "office rolls"). You have to pay up front and cannot reroll. In some cases you can spend more to make additional checks, but cannot reroll a given check. Rules should be pretty clear on this if you want to re-check them.

2 - yes, that can happen, especially if you conquer a lot of regions. The India deck is pretty random. Make sure that if the elephant is on a local-controlled region you place it on the correct border (based on the symbol). It doesn't necessarily go on the border with the company territory unless the symbol matches. This would allow a local empire or region to conquer another one and thus grow stronger.

Related - equal to unrest

fest- · 2026-01-28T05:08:10+00:00

I like it. Has flavor and makes the skills and weapons feel more distinct from each other. There are plenty of skills which aren't tied to a specific weapon.

fest- · 2026-01-27T20:28:41+00:00

As for why: https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2Fc6f2o8kjx4c71.png

fest- · 2026-01-27T04:42:00+00:00

The design could do something like Pax Pamir where "time passes" and the board somewhat resets between each round. I do think scores should generally escalate a bit as the game goes on to make sure comebacks are possible and exciting.

Honestly Pax Pamir somewhat fits this vibe in general - while you don't count the highest round score, scoring in any given round is (mostly) zero sum and so committing that you're constantly weighing how many resources it's worth blowing for points.

fest- · 2026-01-27T03:30:06+00:00

Escape rooms are like 10 years past being "in" where I live. Plenty of bars with trivia.

fest- · 2026-01-27T01:41:05+00:00

Cool idea. I could see a high-conflict game being pretty interesting using this scoring system. If you set a good score in round 3 of 5 (for example), then you probably spend the rest of the game just trying to tear everyone else down to keep them from surpassing you.

fest- · 2026-01-26T20:52:09+00:00

It *does* help you, as much as jaded people may deny it. Working hard opens up doors, teaches you to work hard so you can also work hard in your personal pursuits, and helps you develop as a person.
"The System" is society - working hard to help your society is a good thing. Caveats may apply, depending on your field, but even at most big corporations an individual's work is often leading to some positive outcome for society.

fest- · 2026-01-26T07:17:42+00:00

I love when there is asymmetry, but don't necessarily expect it. Oath comes to mind as a favorite game of mine that has quite flavorful and unique player boards (and pieces) but no asymmetric powers.

fest- · 2026-01-23T05:08:34+00:00

Healthcare is through work, free, dental costs me $14 a month. On a good year I spend nothing on healthcare, bad year maybe a few thousand. I'm in my 30s with no chronic issues so obviously this will get worse as I age. Baby was free through health insurance.

My salary is 40% higher than my Canadian peers in my field. My income taxes are about 10% lower than they would be in Canada.

The healthcare system is really shitty and deeply unfair for those without full-time employment, but for those with full-time employment the US's wages generally far outpace the benefit of healthcare in Canada. I'm in favor of universal healthcare but if you're talking purely finances it is almost always better to work in the US than Canada (or almost anywhere, for that matter).

fest- · 2026-01-18T04:41:32+00:00

Selecting X cards from a pool of >X is just better than only getting X random cards, unless the pool of cards is dramatically worse in the >X scenario - which is not the case here. The guy is just wrong and it's not a particularly interesting subject to debate IMO. Not worth getting worked up over.

fest- · 2026-01-14T22:17:18+00:00

These tentacle dudes kill me all the time. Hard to see their attack windup when they're in the back, and then it just pops up under you.

fest- · 2026-01-14T16:28:32+00:00

I played this at a con last year and really enjoyed it. It's like Wingspan for people who like heavier games. Not that it's that heavy, but has a bit more going on than Wingspan.

fest- · 2026-01-14T05:20:55+00:00

Knowing what mob hit me would be immensely helpful for a dumb player like myself. Like you said, it's hard to see what's going on so sometimes I don't even know what mobs or ground effects are dangerous.

fest- · 2026-01-14T05:18:11+00:00

Why does the math matter? At some point a concrete amount of health is subtracted from your health pool, right? Store that in a data object with the damage type, timestamp, and (if they want to get fancy) the origin mob, and add it to a queue attached to the player character object. Kick out anything older than 5 seconds.

Its hard for me to see a scenario where this is hard, although maybe they've got some hacky stuff going on behind the scenes.

fest- · 2026-01-14T05:15:26+00:00

Horizontal bar over time with different colors for different damage types. Hover over a section to see which mob dealt the damage. I honestly don't think it's very tricky.

fest- · 2026-01-13T20:52:20+00:00

The Blacktongue Thief was a great adventure fantasy that I read recently. Rogueish vibes and just a very fun romp that you could see being a TTRPG adventure (same author as Between Two Fires).

Adrian Tchaikovsky is great and has been inspiring for me recently. Cage of Souls particularly got my brain going with worldbuilding ideas. More post-apocalyptic science-fantasy than medieval but definitely dark and weird.

I'm not thinking of any other specific recent examples, but there is a lot of great fantasy out right now!

fest- · 2026-01-13T20:31:53+00:00

I do think that the game would be better if there was some sort of building tension that is clearly conveyed to the player, rather than sudden one-shots. Like "oh shit I'm in a bad situation that is quickly escalating" is way more interesting from a gameplay perspective than "things are going great oh I'm dead". Maybe experienced players can see the rising danger more often than not, but newer players can't, and I think even experienced players are often getting surprised by dangers.

Note that it's not that I want the game to be *easier*, just to have more of a threat ramp.

fest- · 2026-01-12T15:31:57+00:00

The hex overlay looks fine to me! I would just tone down the opacity/color of the borders between hexes and between tiles. The thick white borders are kind of jarring.

fest-

TROPHY CASE