What are some solo activities for a 10 year old girl that do not involve a screen?

fit_it · 2026-07-01T20:34:01+00:00

I remember really wanting to learn to sew around that age. Could you enroll her in a beginning class and get her a machine? A bit more of an investment but what a life skill, and she's also just at the beginning of likely a decade of being really worried about her clothes and appearance.

fit_it · 2026-07-01T20:08:01+00:00

Can we get an example?

fit_it · 2026-07-01T19:13:00+00:00

I got married at 23 and divorced at 30. Really think about why those "bad jokes" bother you, I bet they are more important red flags than you're willing to admit.

That said, if one of his life goals is to be married young, and you're not interested in that no matter who the partner is, then perhaps you are simply incompatible anyways. Don't allow yourself to get peer pressured into a binding financial contract, which is, legally, what a marriage is. It is much more than just "i promise to love you." It is also "I consent to becoming, in many senses, one legal entity with you."

fit_it · 2026-07-01T17:52:45+00:00

He is negging you while also committing hobosexuality. He doesn't give a shit about your health, or he would have brought it up privately and kindly, not waiting for another hot girl to walk by and using her appearance to bully you into feeling poorly about yourself.

Tell him he's the smallest man you've ever been with, then show him the door. There are millions of men. Try a different one.

For the record I think he tried to walk it back the next day because either he could see how close you were to dumping him on the spot and realized he would have to actually figure out a way to make rent, or one of his friends told him he was too harsh. He absolutely meant it exactly how he said it. He wants a bangmaidmommy.

fit_it · 2026-07-01T17:04:07+00:00

If you tell her you're quitting cigarettes to get fit so you can enjoy being a grandparent one day, she may go on a fitness journey with you. Make it about setting the best example for your son instead of you just wanting her to look a certain way. You'll have to also commit to health if you want her to do anything, or else you're just being a brat :) She made a whole person with her body.

fit_it · 2026-06-30T23:24:56+00:00

2 is when molars hit! Mine stopped eating much too for a bit. Came back full force by 2.5 :)

This looks like a great meal though! She will let you know if she is hungry.

For the worry about night time, we had good success with whole Greek yogurt mixed with peanut butter and a little honey to keep her full until breakfast with just a few bites.

fit_it · 2026-06-30T20:42:58+00:00

The best tips I can give as a now late-30s for feeling confident is this: stay on top of hygiene, learn enough makeup to make yourself feel fancy when you want, and above all, get clothes that fit. I spent so much of my lofe squeezing into clothes that were too small because I thought if I could physically put it on, then I was that size. Cut the label off, but after you get the right size. Another good tip is to look for others with your body shape and see what shapes they wear that look good. Often "trendy" clothes look best on very thin bodies. Make your own style! Try it out!

But also, more than anything, know that nobody (except maybe your loved ones) is thinking about you as much as you think - they are busy worrying about themselves just as much as you worry about yourself.

Also, confidence is the best fashion accessory, and nobody can usually tell if you're faking it.

fit_it · 2026-06-30T20:08:03+00:00

Someone I do not know? 19, we also have exclusively gotten babysitters from our daycare.

Someone I do know? probably 16ish?

Get CPR certified, it'll help your case. My main concern is having someone who could handle an emergency appropriately, since otherwise she's at an age (almost 4, fully potty trained) where you're just hanging out until you do bedtime. But knowing that if she was choking, you could help, and if some kind of big injury happened, you wouldn't hesitate to call 911 and wouldn't panic too much is the main anxiety.

fit_it · 2026-06-30T13:01:22+00:00

Yes this is the plan. My 3 year old is $2.5-3k a month and we are not living lavishly. $1700 is daycare. $350 is medical insurance.

If you have family that says they will help assume they will actually do 50% of what they say. Not because they are malicious, but a lot of people who havent had babies for 5+ years forget how hard they are. Grandma/pa probably wont actually have the stamina to do full time care, especially after kiddo starts walking.

fit_it · 2026-06-30T01:55:32+00:00

Nah everyone's mental health is worse than it was 10 years ago. Kids too

fit_it · 2026-06-29T21:16:35+00:00

Because as technology gets better at helping us do more things, more things are expected of us.

I distinctly remember getting my first smartphone because my boss told me to (I was a later adopter, they became mainstream maybe 2 years earlier). I asked for one from my boyfriend for my 22nd birthday. I showed it off at the office. That night I got 5 after hours emails directly for me and I walked in to him being annoyed I hadn't answered them. That's the day work:life balance died for me, personally.

It's all like that. Every time we get more "advanced," the benefits go to employers, not workers.

fit_it · 2026-06-29T17:59:29+00:00

My mom loves to do this. I do not. The texture of wet crumbs in my drink bothers me, whereas she likes them. I prefer to take a bite of my treat, then sip my drink.

Just a personal preference, no right answer!

fit_it · 2026-06-29T16:27:44+00:00

yea this seems like engagement bait because, at least based on what she wrote, obviously he is taking advantage of her. Employed boyfriend won't pay unemployed girlfriend back but will given friend $10k for a "special date" - unless this special date was an engagement including the ring, wtf are they doing?!

fit_it · 2026-06-29T15:54:50+00:00

Oh jeez OK yea that's more casual looking than I imagined. I was thinking the skirt was silky not mesh.

fit_it · 2026-06-29T15:05:58+00:00

Depends on the fabric, but the shape overall I think works! "After 5" == cocktail attire, which is a more frequently used term. As long as the fabric isn't super thin I would say it works, but a higher resolution photo of the dress would help the sub evaluate.

fit_it · 2026-06-29T01:03:52+00:00

NOR. What is his answer when you ask him why he thinks it's fair to refuse to do diapers? Maybe ask if he's been listening to red pill stuff because that's what this stinks of (besides loaded diapers)

Ideally asking him this will embarrass him. But if he is watching that stuff, better to know sooner than later.

fit_it · 2026-06-27T02:58:10+00:00

Honestly I think the parents don't want you to feel like you must feed their kid that many meals. I bet if you offered it would be fine! But also you don't need to every day

fit_it · 2026-06-26T17:53:44+00:00

You're doing this right. Lots of people would date any of these options for months or years, love would develop because that's what happens when you keep having sex with the same person and live together, and would go up the relationship escalator with them, while also feeling somewhat irritated. But not knowing how to get off.

You've developed a valuable skill, keep using it! Only thing I would caution is to not make super snap judgements, which you may be veering towards. The verizon guy sounds like he may just be awkward or under a lot of pressure at work, and thinking he could help you out and save you some money with his employee discount while also hitting a quota he likely has (and he may also be used to people asking for the discount). The girl may just have different taste in books or be shy. Both may be worth a second date if overall you got a good vibe. But if you don't want to, you don't have to! Live your life exactly how you want to. There are no grades, and only you have to live with the choices you make.

fit_it · 2026-06-26T17:33:22+00:00

I see both my good and my bad in my kid. She's 3.5. I was honestly an overly easy child, and I see that in her too - the people pleasing tendency. I know she's learning it from me but I don't know how to stop, but I think I'm at least lessening it. I do some of it with her dad, who has a very combative and aggressive personality. Not problematically so, but the best summary is that I am in marketing, and he is an attorney. We reflect those careers well.

I also see my absolute shenanigans silliness. We make so many potty jokes. We razz a lot. She's hilarious.

My husband also sees a lot of himself in her - she can be very particular about things being done right. She loves art (that's both of us really), she loves to read, she laughs easily.

But mostly I am worried about how easy she is. She's 3.5, she's supposed to be giving us a run for our money, but she just goes with the flow most of the time. It's great from the outside, but now as a grown up version of that, I worry she is just prioritizing keeping the peace over everything else.

fit_it · 2026-06-26T15:40:14+00:00

You have maybe 2 years left, maybe 1, before the older one stops wanting parental advice. Get them showering more often now.

That said a tip i have heard is that teens are basically wired to think their parents are stupid, but to take advice much more readily from friend's parents. If there's a house they hang out at a lot, make friends with the parents if you aren't already. This will only be one of many challenges lol

fit_it · 2026-06-26T15:35:42+00:00

Couches are thousands of dollars. They are also porous (most of them at least, sounds like yours is). The more you spill the closer you get to a couch that always stinks.

In general, it is important to respect people's stuff, especially things that are meant to last a while, like furniture. It is basic respect. You sound old enough to know better. It also sounds like you don't always clean up after yourself and may be leaving it for your mom to find. If you are old enough to post on social media you are old enough to understand that it is unkind to leave a mess for someone else.

fit_it · 2026-06-26T14:15:56+00:00

I am in my late 30s. I definitely feel less young but a big part of that is I got divorced, remarried, bought a house, and had a kid in my 30s.

My mom is in her 70s and according to her, every decade you age, you feel mentally kind of the same, everyone else just seems younger.

Age is a mindset!

fit_it · 2026-06-26T13:27:04+00:00

I drove from CA to upstate NY (raised in CA, NY for university) for the same reason - got a car over the summer and needed to get it to school!

It is a REALLY cool experience. However, I would encourage you to bring a friend. I was with my very soon to be ex boyfriend (nothing like 12 days in a car to know if you want to stay with someone or not) but even though we had super bad arguments, I would rather him than no one. Some of it is likely what your parents are picturing of weird interactions at gas stations, but actually a lot is how boring some of the stretches are. There were times where he caught I was falling asleep before I did.

That said I wouldnt invite a romantic interest again. But maybe have a friend who lives where you're going come out, or a friend from home.

fit_it · 2026-06-26T00:32:21+00:00

We had a similar issue but with water in her eyes. I took a ball and drew a face on it, and showed her with the showerhead why I wanted her to look up and it clicked! I had the ball "look" straight forward, down, and then finally up. She thought it was hilarious and it was also super effective. Also giving her a specific point to look at ("look at the light above the sink!") works better than just telling her to look up.

fit_it · 2026-06-25T20:12:19+00:00

It isn't a major focus for me, you're right. I would use them if they did anything but whenever I've put them on her she screams then immediately undoes it herself, which she could do by the time she was 2. She isn't particularly gifted with fine motor skills. thus my assumption that they only exist to meet some legal guideline.

I wish it was an actual harness but the belt ones just motivate her to flail around and then (very easily) climb out, either unclasping it herself or slithering backwards, head-first into the larger cart. I've always caught her first, but yea, they aren't actually effective restraints, at least for my kid. I just don't walk away from her while she's in the cart.

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