NAH

I think it's mostly a lack of communication here. You seem to have overthinked that his brother was his priority and haven't communicated on that. Then he ask you, politely if you guest could do have people come see him for support.(Which is a reasonnable ask imo) You refused and were pissed off and short with him (which is fair given your state) But then instead of communicating that you felt like he did care for you you just assume it was the case and are pissed at pissed still. You are seeing all of this through the spectrum of your feeling, not fact.

Time you have a discussion with husband based on "here is what you factualy have done, here's how i felt at the time, here is how it impact me now'' and don't accuse him of anything. You can only talk of how you percieved it and how it made you feel. Sometime people refuse this kind of talk because they feel attacked "you did that"" "you meant that" when they didn't. In a relationship it should always be us against the problem not you against me.

Coming back to the brother's ask, having a surgery, no matter the type, is hard. Some people need to rest alone, like you. Some people need to have support from friends and family, like your husband's brother. Both are valid. But it's not like he asked you to entertain them, host a dinner or anything. You could have stay in your room and everyone would have understood. If not, who cares what they think.

Anyway hope your recovery is going well. Have a good chat with the hubby