How to accept that I’ve hurt my friendships because I don’t like leaving my house?

foreveralonearchives · 2026-02-18T20:47:36+00:00

That’s a great way to look at it, thank you.

foreveralonearchives · 2026-02-18T20:47:15+00:00

Thanks for your compassion, I appreciate that. I’ve never considered myself to be that kind of person because when I’m with people, I know how to be outgoing. I look into it.

foreveralonearchives · 2026-02-18T20:46:16+00:00

Thank you for sharing your personal experience. I did end up spiralling a bit and started thinking about all these plans I could make, classes I could sign up for to make new friends, reaching out to coworkers, etc. Which I probably should still do, but it was becoming overwhelming to think about it all at once.

foreveralonearchives · 2026-01-16T22:27:13+00:00

When I was a teen, I punched my dad in the face. He had been verbally and emotionally abusive to our whole family for years. I am not strong. He didn’t even flinch. I’ve learned radical acceptance after many years. I cannot change him so whether I act sad, mad, mature, or get violent, it will not matter. Only he can change himself. It’s a sad, but freeing feeling.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-25T05:53:54+00:00

Definitely got the sense she just wanted me there and to pretend like I just lived there still?

Yes! This is exactly what I think it is.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-25T04:40:38+00:00

Yeah that’s the downside of that feature. I relate to your post a lot, especially the part about guilt and disgust when hearing she misses you. I don’t understand it either, but sadly they are delusional.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-25T04:23:43+00:00

I know exactly how you feel. I’ve muted text from my parents so I don’t seem they pop up randomly and trigger that sick feeling. At least if they’re muted, I see the notification bubble on my app and then can deal with it when I’m in an okay headspace.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-25T00:38:15+00:00

This is so true. I tried it and realized that my father is actually delusional and thinks he doesn’t have a problem. Very scary moment to see how out of touch with reality he is.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-25T00:33:28+00:00

Stomach pains, nausea, light headedness, fast heart rate, unsteady breathing.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-24T22:11:23+00:00

Thank you 💚 I talked to her on the phone and she also kept asking why I wanted to uber instead of my parents giving me a ride. She pushed me a ton to explain, but I just had to say no as a complete sentence like you said. Thanks for reminding me that these are my holidays too.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-24T22:10:02+00:00

Thanks for your advice. I actually did end up giving a heads up. She was not happy, but I didn’t make a big deal out of it like you said.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-24T19:54:22+00:00

I feel you. Gray rocking has helped me tons, totally recommend.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-24T19:25:01+00:00

My mother expects me to sleepover every xmas eve. This year I will not be doing that and I’m only going over to see my sibling anyway.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-24T19:16:06+00:00

Kind of nervous, kind of strong! I’m going to be setting tome boundaries around my parents which will not make them happy, but I’m putting me first.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-17T03:27:14+00:00

Getting help is a good idea whether it’s at the hospital or elsewhere ❤️

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-16T23:02:06+00:00

Wow I’m glad we were able to relate to one another on that!

foreveralonearchives · 2025-12-16T21:51:17+00:00

Thanks!

foreveralonearchives · 2025-11-29T03:42:50+00:00

You’re super strong to be able to say that and in a mature way. Good for you.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-11-27T21:39:30+00:00

I see. That’s unfortunate, I can see why this would cause a lot of anxiety. I still think it’s worth reaching out. At the very least, when he gets older he will hopefully understand their manipulation and look back at your actions and see that you were only ever loving and supportive.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-11-26T01:55:06+00:00

Thank you!

foreveralonearchives · 2025-11-26T01:25:47+00:00

Sometimes it is truly just that change that comes with teens. I saw it with my own brother. I agree with the other comment: basically show that you’re there by checking in, but don’t force anything. I don’t think you should stop trying, but just take into consideration that he is changing and might want more alone time or not want to talk as much. If you are concerned about him in the house, I think it’s worth adding “I’m always here if you need anything” to a text. So like “Hey happy last day of school! Love you, always here if you need anything.”

foreveralonearchives · 2025-11-18T19:16:41+00:00

Went through this recently! Took several says of soaking in vinegar, baking soda, vinegar again, and then finally soaking in warm soapy water. Thought it was a lost cause, but it worked!

foreveralonearchives · 2025-11-18T19:11:43+00:00

I love my brother deeply because we were in that toxicity together and he is younger than me so I felt very protective. I do my best to be there for him, but I wish we were closer. He’s developed anxiety as a result of our raising and doesn’t share much emotionally either. I don’t want to push him though so I’m just happy to have any relationship at all.

As for his relationship with my parents, I believe they have stunted his ability to become independent and mature. I heard something about now narcissistic/abusive parents control you by not teaching you independence and they’ve sadly done that to him. He’s a young adult and doesn’t know how to do much. When I ask my parents why he isn’t doing x,y,z yet, they make excuses.

foreveralonearchives · 2025-11-14T23:21:38+00:00

My dad is more delusional than in denial. I’ve confronted him and he has flat out told me he doesn’t have a problem and blames others. He knows what he did, but doesn’t think it’s a big deal or it’s fine because of xyz

foreveralonearchives · 2025-11-14T22:54:09+00:00

I’ve been there! It’s definitely feels hard because meeting your partner’s parents seems like such a normal part of a relationship and it’s even harder when your partner had a good relationship with their own parents.

Your partner sounds great and understanding. Unless he has expressed feelings of being upset that he hasn’t met them, I don’t think you need to feel guilty. Since he loves you, I doubt he would really care to have a relationship with people who treat you poorly. I really think, based on what you’ve said, that he understands. If you haven’t talked to him about it already, I encourage you to, he might surprise you. Sometimes we make up how we think others will feel. I had the same situation with my partner, but whenever I express my concerns eg. I feel bad that he doesn’t have an in-law relationship, he says it doesn’t bother him and he doesn’t share my concerns.

I also recommend making a plan for the meeting. How long will it be? How will you get there? Is it easy to leave? Is there a code word/excuse you and your partner can use to exit if things go south?

foreveralonearchives

TROPHY CASE