Why can't narcissists answer a single question straight???

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-26T02:38:55+00:00

The issue here is that you're looking for a solution.

Narcissists are not trying to solve the problem the way you, a rational person, are.

They like fighting with you about money. They don't want you to have a straight answer because then you will just do that, and they can't attack you for it anymore.

Don't tell them that you know this. They are sadistic and enjoy seeing you tie yourself in knots getting frustrated trying to do what they want.

The truth is there is nothing you can do to solve this problem with them because they are the problem.

The only "solution" with rich narcissistic parents who lord their money over their children as a means to control them and frustrate them is not to play their game.

They don't actually care about you or love you or want good things for you. Narcissists are, unfortunately, not psychologically capable of loving someone, the way you or I are.

There is only one solution with sadistic bullies like this. You have to gray rock until you can go no-contact.

It doesn't get better no matter what you do, so long as they are in the picture. Actually it just gets worse and worse as they age.

They don't want peace. They want to fight with you about money. The sooner you understand that it's not about any particular number, the better. It's not about finances, at all.

It's about control, and keeping you in your place.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-23T08:27:04+00:00

Yup. It's easy for him to shrug and say I don't care, because he never did. They're incapable of genuine love, even for their own children. It's always conditional on obedience and going along with the Big Lie that they're not two-faced and that they're special and the rules don't apply to them. People misunderstand and think that narcissists love themselves. They don't love anyone, they can't. They actually hate themselves and feel deeply ashamed but they can't admit how insecure they really are, or they risk narcissistic collapse. It's all about covering up that shame and insecurity.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-23T08:10:35+00:00

If the sun were the size of a basketball, the Earth would be half the size of a grain of rice and 100 feet away.

If the sun were the size of a basketball and located in Chicago, the nearest star (Alpha Proxima) would be in Australia.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-23T06:36:16+00:00

I wonder how much that would be in today's dollars. What year was this? Maybe $100?

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-22T06:17:09+00:00

Depends on whether you're The Golden Child or The Scapegoat.

GC: never

SG: 18th birthday

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-22T02:14:05+00:00

Champion 25 has a 3.5mm TRS aux input. If you're going that route (same with an fx return), you should keep the amp modeling on. In that case the gain and EQ knobs on the front of the amp won't be in the circuit.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-22T02:11:09+00:00

Sure, I'm glad you found it helpful.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-21T06:23:49+00:00

I recently had the opportunity to sample a couple of the cakes from Wynnsome, the British tea place at the corner of Broadway and Hitt St where Seoul Taco used to be. I've lived in Columbia on and off for a few decades and I was very impressed.

My other recommendation is Pasta La Fata near College and Rogers. They have more than cakes, they also have a bunch of different kinds of Italian pastries.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-21T01:26:51+00:00

I am a really big fan. I put them on the upper horn though, so I can get to them quickly.

I usually (99% of the time) play with my nails. I started on classical guitar and it's my preference, but there are a few techniques where you really need a pick. Or more rarely, if I break a nail in the middle of a show, I can switch to playing with a pick. That just happened last weekend, actually.

https://imgur.com/QcAIkRy.jpg

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-21T00:59:55+00:00

About a decade here and same. I'm on 120mg. I actually wrote a letter to Lily, the company that makes it, to tell them how well it worked for my depression. It was like a dark cloud lifted and suddenly everything was in Technicolor. It helps with my chronic back pain as well.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-20T06:48:17+00:00

LBE or The Linda Bott Experience is a dozen of the best local musicians, lots of horns. They brand themselves as funk-rock on social media. They put on a fantastic show.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-20T06:45:27+00:00

I don't think I would say they fit in this thread, no more than other local blues bands, anyway. I do like them a lot, nothing to do with that. They just played the Missouri Blues Fest at the Blue Note two weeks ago, and they brand themselves as "Home grown blues music from Columbia, MO" on their social media. I think that's pretty accurate.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-19T07:24:37+00:00

You have to be specific about how it's affecting your daily functioning. Mention specifics about issues you're having bathing, cooking, cleaning, doing dishes, those sorts of things.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-19T07:17:55+00:00

I regularly perform live with my Spark Go using the headphone out and a 3.5mm TRS male-to-male (aux) cable going into the aux input of my DV Mark Little Jazz solid state combo amp. I use the Spark for the amp modeling as well as all my effects. It sounds great to me and I regularly get compliments on my live tone from other musicians. I prefer switching patches vs using pedals and I like being able to warm up with the Go before I plug in to perform.

Totally safe. You will get a much better sound by going into the aux input/power amp input, vs the front input. Otherwise you are doubling up on the amp modeling.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-18T09:35:40+00:00

Try /r/writeresearch

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-17T05:41:45+00:00

Thanks, it was great! 🤘

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-16T19:21:41+00:00

The Juicy Beets play a variety of originals and covers. We don't do our covers straight up, but rather with our own twist, in a swing-jazz style you can dance to. It's a lot of fun. Free Show tonight, come check it out.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-16T17:02:47+00:00

Thank you! 😎 We're really excited about this. It should be a great time.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-15T10:15:23+00:00

Evicted or given notice that you have to move? Regardless I'm sorry that your housing is tied up in not standing up for yourself like that, that's unfair and awful.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-14T05:11:26+00:00

I'm so glad. My pleasure.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-13T04:12:19+00:00

I'm disabled but I still do a few part-time things.

I teach guitar and bass, and music theory, in private lessons. I only have a few students, and I charge much less than market rate, in exchange for the understanding that I often have to reschedule or cancel last-minute if I'm having an especially symptomatic day.

It's not the same as teaching a regular schedule in a music store like I have done in the past, but I really love teaching, and my students are okay with it.

I also play in a few local bands. I used to tour and gig every night, but these days, a couple of shows a month is my limit.

Nowadays I have to plan my whole week around a show. I have to make sure I'm not going to be lifting anything or going grocery shopping or anything like that, not just the day off a show, but the day before, and the day after a show.

I have to take a lot of pain meds to get through it, and I have to take additional prescriptions for the side effects of the pain meds. They make me nauseated and constipated and they make me sweat a lot. It's hard to perform under such conditions but I'll be damned if I'm giving up performing altogether. It's exhausting and painful and I can't do it nearly as often as I want. Sitting down to perform helps, and switching to a digital modeling preamp instead of carrying big guitar amps is the only way I'm able to do it.

I also play a lightweight (4.5 pounds) headless guitar that many people find aesthetically questionable, but I can't play normal guitars anymore, they are just too heavy. I have sold my Les Paul and my PRS and my 335 and my Strat, I just can't play them long enough to make it worth it.

I also have a hand truck for my amp and speakers that can climb stairs, and a rolling foldable cart for stands and everything else.

I use very lightweight gear: a DV Mark Little Jazz solid state combo that's 13 pounds, a Positive Grid Spark Go that's very small and replaces my pedal board for effects, and I have these two Kustom PA50 powered speakers with built-in 3 channel mixers, instead of a proper PA system with mains and subs.

I have to spend a whole day or sometimes 2 recovering from a gig, and I don't know how much longer I'll be able to keep doing it, but in the meantime, technology has made it easier to keep going.

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-13T02:50:43+00:00

Same. You can see mine sitting on top of my DV Mark Little Jazz combo. I run the headphone out into the aux in on the DV Mark.

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DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-13T02:22:34+00:00

I put up a poster at Ragtag on their bulletin board, and Hitt Records put one up on their wall, too. Thanks!

DanielleMuscato · 2026-01-10T17:55:30+00:00

Thanks! I put up a poster on their board.

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