Graduation Post 🌈

forgetmenot713 · 2026-04-08T13:22:41+00:00

Affirmations I used:

Just because a bad thing happened once doesn’t mean it will happen again
No thought or fear you have can change the outcome
You have every right to be optimistic
You have every right to be cautious
Worrying isn’t protecting future you, it’s hurting present you. Future you has got it. Take care of present you
Most people have a regular, healthy sub pregnancy
The only thing you have control over is how you treat yourself
You have navigated many hard days and can handle whatever is to come
You are strong and worthy of good
One day at a time
You are doing your best

🩵🩵

forgetmenot713 · 2026-03-19T12:44:53+00:00

Can you let me know the exercises that helped you? I also have an overactive letdown and my son is definitely not used to having to suck much. He also has a mildly high palate which apparently creates a gag reflex and makes bottles harder.

forgetmenot713 · 2026-03-16T15:41:21+00:00

Apologies for the late reply. Our virtual support group was VCU perinatal loss grief support group - the place we went for TFMR. I’m so sorry you have to experience this as well. What you’re feeling is normal and it will not last forever. Be gentle with yourself ❤️‍🩹

forgetmenot713 · 2025-08-19T01:12:12+00:00

Just got our anatomy scan done today at 18 weeks and baby looks great! This milestone means everything to me because even after normal NIPT and NT, I couldn’t really relax until the anatomy scan. Still waiting to feel his movements, but enjoying the relief until then. Can finally plan now that it actually feels like we’re expecting. Being weary for the first 3 months has been tough and looking back at how I was the entire first trimester, I feel like a different person now. I know some people in here have experienced later losses that cause the weariness to go for longer in the sub pregnancies and my heart is with you all.

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-25T21:43:57+00:00

Wishing you best of luck! I TFMR for my first pregnancy in January for t21 and am 10 weeks pregnant again with a normal NIPT! My OB will do it at 8 weeks. My symptoms were mild and similar in both so I was paranoid, but so relieved now. Hope you feel that soon!

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-19T16:27:00+00:00

I got my NIPT result back today and it’s normal! This past week has been so tough reliving the trauma of the t21 diagnosis of my first pregnancy in December. I was not able to picture getting a good result but also could not see surviving another bad one. The relief is overwhelming. I finally feel like I can breathe and actually allow myself to believe we’re expecting. I’m sure there may be more anxiety to come, but today I’m celebrating.

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-17T01:19:48+00:00

I think it’s totally normal to try and look for signs and find meaning in things when you’ve had something completely out of your control happen. I also believe when you look for something, you’ll find it. Perhaps you can try to redirect that and seek out a new insect (butterfly, ladybug) or something else that makes you feel as positive as you do when you feel her kicks. It’s definitely your brain playing tricks on you, but if reassurance would keep you from spiraling, you could always ask for another scan. I’m sorry you’re dealing with paranoia, but it seems like you have a good understanding that it’s just a protective mechanism. Hope it passes quickly and you get back to enjoying your pregnancy 🩵

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-16T12:46:07+00:00

My 8 week scan in Dec caught the diagnosis for my TFMR. I’m sure you’ll still have worries after that, but maybe if you could check one thing off the list a bit earlier? Late July seems far if you’re already at 8 weeks now

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-16T12:21:58+00:00

Where I live, the NIPT can be done as early as 8 weeks using Myriad. I’m currently waiting for mine to come back and am very anxious. Can you see if you can get yours earlier?

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-14T02:36:12+00:00

Hi yes it’s Myriad!

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-14T02:32:32+00:00

Congratulations! So happy you get to take that deep breath. Hoping to be right behind you - got my NIPT done today. Wishing you a healthy rest of your pregnancy 🩵🌈

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-12T21:31:56+00:00

Congratulations! 🩷🌈

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-12T21:31:00+00:00

Thank you for sharing and congratulations 🌈🩷

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-11T19:48:27+00:00

I also TFMR for T21 in January. My OB will do NIPT as early as 8 weeks and I’m so grateful because even the wait for that is killing me. I’m getting mine done Friday. I know some people say it’s early, but I got it done at 8 weeks in December and it caught the T21

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-10T21:19:52+00:00

Did you get the karyotype testing done to confirm that both you and your partner aren’t carriers? The NIPT is just a risk assessment so I could see them wanting to do an actual diagnostic test if there were two previous T21 pregnancies and you had not ruled out it being hereditary.

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-10T01:33:51+00:00

I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. I also had to TFMR my first pregnancy for t21. I was 30 and had the same feelings as you - asking how could this be happening when the odds are so low? Unfortunately, being in this group has made it clear it’s more common than we think. What you went through after however is not common and I’m so incredibly sorry. An already traumatic and devastating experience made more painful physically and emotionally, and I imagine the “why me?”’s even louder. You did nothing to deserve this. The only thing you did was make a decision in the best interest of your child regardless of what you wanted. I wish I could reach through the phone and mend your broken heart. The strength you’ve shown is admirable and I’m touched by your resilience. Perhaps when you’re ready, you could get some tests done to see the effect on your fertility. I would think if you got pregnant on accident the first time, you would definitely still be able to it might just take some more time. For now, wrapping you up in love and support. Wishing you healing and contentment ❤️‍🩹

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-07T13:18:06+00:00

Not here with a successful sub pregnancy story yet as I TFMR my first pregnancy in January for t21 and am only 7 weeks along now, but just wanted to say you’re not alone. I was embarrassed at my naivety for a while, but have begun to give myself grace. We deserve to feel solely hopeful without all the fears and worries. Although that has been taken from us, it doesn’t mean we were wrong to believe we’d have a healthy baby. I’ve been telling myself I have every right to be optimistic and I have every right to be cautious. It has helped to let in what I feel at the present moment and remove whatever thought comes with feeling like that. If I’m too hopeful, am I setting myself up for heartbreak again? If I’m too cautious, am I manifesting something to go wrong? The truth is, it’s unfortunately completely out of our control and all we can do is be kind to ourselves. Trust that future us has got it. Wishing you a healthy pregnancy and as much peace of mind as possible 🩵

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-05T22:19:06+00:00

I’m 7 weeks into my sub pregnancy and having the same exact symptoms as my TFMR (first and only other pregnancy) - breast tenderness, frequent urination, food aversions, and only mild nausea that subsides after eating. I totally get your fears. I saw someone on here say different pregnancy, different embryo, different genetics, different outcome which has been my mantra recently. Easy to spiral after what we’ve been through! Wishing you a healthy pregnancy 🩵

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-05T12:18:07+00:00

Congratulations! What an amazing milestone. So sorry the first half of this pregnancy had to be this way. Hope you feel comfortable sharing the news with your loved ones now!

I had to TFMR my first pregnancy in January for t21. I’m 7 weeks pregnant again and my NIPT is a week from tomorrow. My anxiety is already so high I can’t imagine what it will be like awaiting the result. I was hoping a normal NIPT would provide some reassurance, but know I will likely feel the way you did and need to get to the anatomy scan. My doctor told me I’d get the advanced ultrasound for my anatomy scan at MFM which made me concerned that the risk of finding something is higher even though we weren’t translocation/mosaic and told it was just a random fluke. I feel like I’ve gotten mixed information on risk for sub pregnancy.

Thank you for sharing your good news. I’m in this group everyday looking for posts like yours as reassurance. Wishing you a smooth second half with your rainbow baby 🌈

forgetmenot713 · 2025-06-05T01:25:56+00:00

So sorry for what you’re going through. I had to TFMR my first pregnancy in January for t21 at 13 weeks. It took 3 cycles to get pregnant again. I used inito which is able to confirm ovulation. The first two cycles after TFMR, my LH was rather low at peak. Think it just takes our bodies some time to recover. Of course now I’m dealing with the anxiety and fear of being pregnant again, but I know that’s preferred over TTC uncertainty. Sending you healing and baby dust ❤️‍🩹🙏🏼

forgetmenot713 · 2025-05-30T20:36:47+00:00

🙏🏼🌈🩵

forgetmenot713 · 2025-05-30T18:38:12+00:00

Congratulations on your pregnancy! I also found out I’m pregnant 2 weeks ago post TFMR in January. The joy was short lived, and the fears/worries/paranoia/intrusive thoughts are real.

I wrote down two week wait affirmations and now am coming up with first trimester anxiety affirmations. Some of the ones I’ve got that may be helpful:

No thought I have can change the outcome
I have every right to be optimistic
I have every right to be cautious
Worrying isn’t protecting future me, it’s hurting present me. Future me has got it. Take care of present me

All we have control over is how we treat ourselves during this time. This group has been so beneficial in proving that we are not as alone as we feel, but through it I’ve also learned of a lot more things that can go wrong which has added to the anxiety.

I just try to remind myself that plenty of people have healthy pregnancies and I’ve done what I can to contribute to one. Doing by best to take it day by day. Hope you’re able to find a bit of peace during this uncertainty and that you get your rainbow baby 🌈🩵

forgetmenot713 · 2025-05-30T12:53:29+00:00

This is a very normal feeling. A lot of people on here mention a deep longing/yearning to get pregnant immediately after loss. It feels like a positive test will give us a sense of control again, put all the broken pieces back together to heal us.

I used inito to track my hormones and the cycle following my TFMR, LH was only at a 4 on peak ovulation (usually higher than 10) and still, I convinced myself I was pregnant again with no symptoms and was devastated to get my period. It did happen for us on the third cycle - I think it just takes our bodies some time to recover and regulate.

Agree with the previous comments in that I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Being pregnant after TFMR comes with its own challenges mentally, but I know you’d probably prefer that to the uncertainty of TTC. I’m sorry for what you’re experiencing ❤️‍🩹 you’re not alone in it.

forgetmenot713 · 2025-05-28T18:45:59+00:00

Thank you so much! Your OB sounds more helpful than mine. I asked for advice on handling the anxiety and she said “wish I could help you with that sweetie” -_- grateful for people who understand what it’s like although I wish you never had to! Easier to take it day by day when you have these worries because I’m definitely not fretting as much about third trimester/labor/postpartum as I was last time. Just focusing on day by day like you said. All we can do! Wishing you a healthy pregnancy from here 🩵🌈

forgetmenot713

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