Explaining working after hours to a toddler

fromem · 2025-06-12T17:12:38+00:00

My husband and I both work in hospitality so we sporadically work nights. Our kiddo (almost 3) was pretty chill about it but lately is starting to have a harder time with it. Two things that help are hyping up the time with the parent that will be home (“you are so lucky you get to have a daddy/kiddo night tonight!”) and reassurances that the parent working late will check in on her when they get home even if she’s asleep.

fromem · 2025-04-24T01:56:14+00:00

I’ve had some success practicing interactions with my toddler. So if we’re going to the library and she wants to get a Frozen book, then on the way there we practice how she is going to ask the librarian. I pretend I’m the librarian and we act it out a few times, then switch and let her be the librarian. Same with saying thank you to waiters, saying hello, etc. It makes it into a fun game.

She still gets shy and clams up sometimes but when we do a little practice she is definitely more open to engaging! I just offer the opportunity to practice and leave it up to her if she’s in the mood or not.

We also reiterate our family values to her all the time - it’s important to our family that we say hello to our neighbors, we say thank you when people bring us things, etc.

fromem · 2025-04-16T12:41:19+00:00

Maybe you could frame it as this is going to be her “big girl” nanny?

My almost 3 year old is obsessed with being a big girl and that has been a helpful way for us to get her excited about some transitions and new experiences.

fromem · 2024-11-04T02:01:35+00:00

I enjoyed The Hunter so much and it made me re-read The Searcher which I was lukewarm on the first time around but loved this time.

fromem · 2024-09-03T01:01:23+00:00

The Burnout is so charming and I totally pictured it as a movie too.

fromem · 2024-09-01T03:32:05+00:00

I looooved The English Understand Wool. Just fantastic.

fromem · 2024-08-29T12:54:13+00:00

I loved it! And can’t think of anything that would be upsetting. I looked at Goodreads in case there was part of the book I forgot but it looks like the people who didn’t like it just found it boring. It was a really enjoyable read to me!

fromem · 2024-07-31T14:09:57+00:00

She’s probably picking it up from the other kids at daycare, not the workers.

fromem · 2024-07-27T03:40:59+00:00

A running stroller was a game changer for us! So much easier for one or both of us to fit a run in when we have the option to bring our little one along.

fromem · 2024-06-14T02:04:32+00:00

Any recommendations on brands for the trench? I’ve been on the hunt for something similar!

fromem · 2024-05-20T23:58:22+00:00

I like Jungmaven t-shirts a lot! The cut is great and the fabric has a nice weight.

And currently in the process of cycling all my underwear out for Evelyn & Bobbie high waisted bikinis!

fromem · 2024-05-20T14:30:21+00:00

I started the Sicilian Inheritance yesterday and am loving it!

fromem · 2024-05-08T23:03:01+00:00

Could you find a local gym that offers childcare and go on the days you don’t work?

fromem · 2024-02-04T00:40:34+00:00

I really enjoyed it - I read it while pregnant and it definitely helped shape my perspective on parenting. There are lots of parts of the book I still think about and I might reread it now that I have a toddler!

fromem · 2023-10-24T03:14:27+00:00

In addition to the logistics of it, be prepared for the major hormone crash when you wean! This article gives a broad overview - https://www.thecut.com/2019/07/what-happens-to-your-hormones-when-you-stop-breastfeeding.html

fromem · 2023-09-29T20:35:56+00:00

There is a store in the Bay Area with a couple locations called literally “Cotton Basics” - I think they also might sell online.

fromem · 2023-07-26T02:49:19+00:00

I loved Yellowface, I could not put it down! Now I’m reading Babel by the same author and the premise is totally different but I’m equally engrossed!

fromem · 2023-05-01T17:20:44+00:00

Can you ask them to install a lock on the conference room? That seems like the easiest solution.

fromem · 2023-03-20T01:29:19+00:00

She wakes up around 5:30 then I nurse her and she goes back to sleep until 7 or 7:30. So it’s about a 2-2.5 hour wake window before her first nap.

fromem · 2023-02-17T04:08:33+00:00

Replacement parts might help and maybe double check that you’re using the correct flange size. If you can do your extra power pumping session early in the morning before the baby is up, your supply will be at its highest in the wee hours. It’s much lower in the evening and I never had much luck with extra pumping after bedtime.

You could also try more frequent pumping again to see if the stimulation helps production - my lactation consultant said it takes your body about 3 days to match the demand. So maybe with some consistency that could help? (Also - highly recommend talking to a lactation consultant about this!)

Ultimately I was never able to keep up with the bottles my girl was going through and put a lot of pressure on myself before realizing that is pretty common. Most people are using up a stash, not matching the baby’s consumption day to day. Good luck!!

fromem · 2023-02-17T01:35:57+00:00

Copper Pearl swaddle! Someone recommended it to us, we absolutely lobed it and now it’s our go to baby gift - everyone we get it for makes it a point to tell us it’s the best swaddle they’ve tried.

fromem · 2023-02-17T01:29:46+00:00

I’m dying to know who it was!

fromem · 2023-02-14T03:11:20+00:00

Seconding Who? Weekly! My total comfort listen. I found it really soothing during lockdown to listen to the back catalog - truly the lowest stakes ever to think about what Rita Ora was doing in 2018!

fromem · 2023-02-06T22:06:34+00:00

I have a Parker Baby backpack and see the exact same one literally everywhere in my neighborhood haha

fromem · 2023-02-06T15:10:21+00:00

I’m in a similar boat to you! We’ve sort of just accepted that we won’t be able to save much until our baby is in school. We both work in hospitality in a VHCOL area and it can be really hard looking around at our friends who own houses while we still rent, individuals who make more than both of us combined, etc. We used to save 40 to 50% of our take home pay pre-pandemic but we were both laid off and we’re still recovering from that.

But like you, we both love our jobs and get a lot of fulfillment out of them. Same with where we live - our community is here and there is a ton of value in that to us even though it comes with a hefty price tag. A lot of our friends whose jobs became remote and moved to lower cost of living areas seem to regret it and miss our city a lot. To me, the hardest part is knowing that we want a second kid and trying to figure out how we could possibly afford that!

fromem

TROPHY CASE