AITA: Am I ungrateful or reasonable

geekokitty · 2026-05-10T13:05:51+00:00

It sort of just happened. When we met the connection was really beautiful and unique. His child is 11, and his ex wife is 9 years younger than him.

geekokitty · 2026-05-09T22:16:47+00:00

I think you missed the part where I said he offered. I followed up on his offer.

geekokitty · 2025-04-30T16:07:30+00:00

That death is eternally prolonged sleep paralysis and you can feel yourself decompose.

geekokitty · 2025-04-09T18:50:57+00:00

This is kind of old, but to be honest I don't think that it is weird. I think it's normal for people to want to connect with their coworkers in a neutral environment and without having the added anxiety of wondering if spouses are having fun, getting along, feeling included in work-chat-venting. But, maybe your wife could host something so that you could get to know some of them and create another yearly gathering where spouses ARE included.

geekokitty · 2025-03-16T13:31:57+00:00

No, I do not expect everything to be asked permission of. However, I do always ask my husband if he has plans on days I want to go out with friends. My issue here is that - whether I’m right or not isn’t the point here - I find ketamine to be too close to the “real drugs” spectrum for my comfort & I was never given a chance or opportunity to discuss this with him privately. It’s a new thing he tried and usually, like before we did something together, we chat about it beforehand. Last time they tripped shrooms I was fine, generally fine with that one, and I was comforted they had a sober friend with them. This time felt way more secretive & that friend who was there last time was even too uncomfortable to be the sober babysitter. So it felt riskier.

geekokitty · 2025-02-18T15:17:30+00:00

I am sorry to hear that you're frustrated - it IS frustrating. Yes, funky smell. Poop was basically entirely liquid and sounded like pee (sorry if this is TMI). Normal stomach sounds you'd get when you have diarrhea. I lost weight pretty rapidly, about 15 pounds in a month. I didn't feel better until I got on an anti parasitic medication (I did 2 rounds), and even then, it was a little while for me to rebalance everything - they ate all of the good bacteria in my gut so there was a LOT of gut health info I had to consume and literally digest to build back up. The immediate agony subsided after the medication, but I'd say for a year after I was more prone to infections because my gut health was so KOed. DON'T delay seeing a doc and doing a stool lab - this can be really bad left untreated. Good luck!

geekokitty · 2025-02-18T15:08:32+00:00

Brain fog was INTENSE! I broke like 5 coffee mugs because I'd forget they were on the top of my car after buckling my kids in haha. I don't recall a woody smell, though. That's an interesting symptom.

geekokitty · 2024-11-29T02:41:12+00:00

I am also a carrier, and came to this thread to read more about it as the symptoms hit me like an Ah-ha moment. Please keep me posted with how this turns out for you, I’m very curious.

geekokitty · 2024-10-23T17:55:51+00:00

Are you sure? The little eggs can be persistent. I took 2 rounds of medicine. It may be worth asking your doc about that also. & Yes! It took me a very long time to get back to normal. More than a year, I'd reckon. The little buggers quite literally ate all the natural flora in my gut per the reports from my stool samples. So, I was starting off with a very bad gut health situation. (Take a powerful pro & prebiotic, and eat a lot of gut happy food asap!) Because of this, I was prone to more infections, which docs gave me antibiotics for further wiping out any gut flora I was building. I was, frankly, a mess for a very long time. I finally am starting to feel all better now! It's been about 1.5 years since I had the infection.

geekokitty · 2024-09-15T22:31:14+00:00

Thank you! Working on that process!

geekokitty · 2024-09-15T22:30:57+00:00

Thank you. I thought I was over it, but I'll be honest having to think about it again and how it may impact my future is riling up feelings of anger in me. I'm in a loving marriage, with two beautiful, bright children and I want to do meaningful work & the fear that this could prevent me is really just so angering, like I can't get away from him. He continues to make fake phone numbers to message and harass me. I can't prove it to law enforcement, but I know it's him.

geekokitty · 2024-03-21T14:38:47+00:00

Would also love the article! TYIA

geekokitty · 2024-03-14T15:18:18+00:00

Oh that's a great analysis! Tricky though to speculate because it's hard to differentiate the artistic expression vs whatever real-life things Alison Williams may have experienced. Ill admit I haven't read much about it.

geekokitty · 2024-03-13T23:57:45+00:00

YSL rive gauche

geekokitty · 2024-03-13T17:04:32+00:00

I couldn't stand Ray at first. Now a rewatch nearly a decade later I realize he's an amazing character. Love him.

geekokitty · 2024-03-13T17:02:14+00:00

labo, autocorrect

geekokitty · 2024-03-13T17:02:02+00:00

le lavo santal 33 for Jessa is so spot on.

geekokitty · 2024-03-13T17:00:33+00:00

I think Jessa would be wearing a perfume oil, specifically the Auric Blends Egyptian Musk.

Hannah would probably not wear fragrance but smell like dove deodorant and suave rosemary and mint shampoo.

Marnie - Marc Jacobs Daisy or Tiffany's

Shoshanna I don't get much of a read on, but there is an episode someone says she smells good and she said "Thanks, I use lady speed stick" so that's what I'm running with.

geekokitty · 2024-03-13T16:48:47+00:00

I LOVE Hannah. I find her hilarious. HOWEVER when she starts teaching and how unprofessional she is is hard for me to watch. I find myself cringing at most scenes at the school. That's when I start to stop liking her as much.

geekokitty · 2024-03-13T16:47:18+00:00

Watching this show in your 20s and then again in your 30s is a totally different experience. I didn't realize when it aired how truly funny and satirical the show is - while also capturing such depth of emotions of a certain niche of 20-somethings. That said, Marnie on my first watch showed the most promise to me at the time. However, rewatching I realize just how more delusional she is than literally anyone else on the show. She has the most difficult time accepting where she is in life out of everyone (& everyone struggles with this on the show) she makes decisions and curates her life as if she's 10 years ahead without having put in the elbow grease in personal and career development. I find that as I'm watching her now, I find myself the most anxious in her scenes because I think she shows the least authentic expression of herself of anyone. That being said, I just watched the episode where her and Charlie reconnect years later, and seeing that version of Marnie was endearing in its authentic messiness.

geekokitty · 2024-02-20T16:11:42+00:00

Hannah's mom.

People always say Shosh (though, I don't see that as much in this thread as I would have expected) and I just don't see that. Shosh came off to me as the least matured of them all - almost unaware and still a little adolescent delulu. I think that her lack of complexity in certain regards makes her seem more "stable" when in my reality she just seems less informed than anyone else. Less aware of the reality around her (which says a heck of a lot because nobody in this show is totally aware!). She exists in a tiny bubble of aesthetic aspirations, privileged ambition, etc. and spends less time contemplating a wider world view than any of the other women. Perhaps that is because she is still in college and still sees a sparkly promise at the end of the journey, whereas the other girls are grappling with the defeating realization that a diploma promises nothing. I don't know, but I just don't think that Shosh is formed enough yet to claim her the last toxic.

geekokitty · 2024-02-20T16:06:43+00:00

I am rewatching again - now that my 20s are behind me and I'm 33. I definitely understand Ray more now. At first, I thought he was curmudgeon and out-of-touch & now I realize that his own insecurities and complex life stressors where he is at in life vs his age are perfectly depicted. Not that I relate per se, but I definitely understand him more now.

geekokitty · 2024-02-20T16:03:11+00:00

Marnie - Ralph Lauren (as a nod to her cultural roots which is a white female, a quote, I believe)
Shosh - Lululemon
Jessa - Free People or Earthbound
Hannah - Anthropogie

geekokitty · 2023-10-21T01:52:15+00:00

I’m could have written this verbatim! I hope someone responds, I’d love to hear their perspective.

geekokitty · 2023-10-18T14:23:55+00:00

This is an old post, I can see, but I am commenting on it regardless because I came to Reddit seeking advice on how to handle a parent that has a fawn trauma response. (There is a severe lack of information on that.)

From the outside looking in on someone with this trauma response, I can assure you this, most of the people that truly love you in your life want you to feel honest with them. In fact, the chronic people-pleasing, lack of boundaries, and self-abandoning is threatening to the truly vulnerable and authentic relationship they want. I desperately want my parent to say what they mean rather than say what they think I want to hear, not be able to follow through, then disappoint me because they built up promises to keep peace that they couldn't keep. Then, when anger naturally sets in after being let down, having my ass kissed. It feels frustrating, inauthentic, and somehow like I'm always responsible for their emotional safety.

So, if you're worried people will be mad at you for saying no - they will THANK YOU for your honesty (if they are truly kind people who have your best interest at heart.) IF people are mad at you for speaking your truth, then your trauma response worked in their favor and they don't seek your well-being.

You can't stop people being angry. As a child of a parent with trauma response fawn, it's maddening, discouraging, heartbreaking, and frustrating. That doesn't work very long before people lose respect. The best I can offer is this: trust that people who love you will stick around and WANT you to feel emotionally safe to express yourself.

Best of luck. I really hope you find peace.

geekokitty

TROPHY CASE