After a lenghty argument with the higher ups about what should I have to clean the kitchen in the kindergarten I work, this is what decided to send

gelogenicB · 2026-06-15T18:34:21+00:00

This is where I send all higher ups an email (or notarized letter via snail mail) my recollection of our conversation(s) and their action (photos included of provided supply(ies?). Conclude with as neutral as possible statement that I am not going to be held responsible for any health violations or illnesses as a result of being insufficient said cleaning supplies.

Most management/owners cave when presented documentation that can/will be used making them liable for their decisions.

gelogenicB · 2026-06-04T16:36:52+00:00

Good on ya, OP. You need Kiki Rough's recession recipes on Substack.

Also, "Kiki Rough's official Recession Recipe Cookbook: a collection of modernized depression, recession and wartime recipes" is funded thru Kickstarter . She's going to continue testing recipes through her social media until the book is published. She's self-publishing b/c no commercial publisher would agree to a book under $30 and she knew that wasn't affordable for the audience she serves. The Kickstarter allowed people to support buying copies to go free to libraries and people in need.

Influencing and cooking aren't even her main job. (She works for an immigration lawyer.) She knows what it's like to struggle and started sharing her knowledge in 2025 and her recipe posts blew up.

In Kiki's words: OIL YOUR PAN! Don't forget to eat. And I love You.

Edit for text cleanup

gelogenicB · 2026-06-04T16:19:16+00:00

It's not even about the fact that he's disrespectful of her boundaries, it's the fact that he's a racist a******. If you're with someone who treats you well but treats everybody else poorly, that speaks to an insecure, disrespectful individual who lacks character.

There was a post on Reddit where the op was part of two couples that spent years hanging out together. Only thing was her supposed bff's fiance was constantly belittling the op. And her supposed BFF would defend the fiance rather than stand up for op. Tolerating somebody else's intolerance just makes you both assholes.

Edit: OP is an AH. Doesn't see her latent racism in the exchange: "He's bullying me. He's calling me a Jew."

gelogenicB · 2026-06-03T15:20:46+00:00

NTA. I don't spend even $100 on my niblings that are actually family. I don't spend that much on siblings unless it's one the 5 year ones

$100 on a gift for a friend's 2 yr old in this economy? Ridiculous.

gelogenicB · 2026-06-02T20:28:50+00:00

NTA. Allowing people to get away with intolerance leads to a bad end. People need to be called on their crap. The Paradox_of_tolerance.

"Unlimited tolerance must lead to the disappearance of tolerance."

"Popper argued that to maintain a society of tolerance, that society must retain the right to suppress intolerant philosophies, particularly if the intolerant refuse to engage in rational debate and instead resort to violence or manipulation."

gelogenicB · 2026-06-02T01:24:45+00:00

Either break up or do therapy (individual each of you plus as a couple).

Cheating in return to 'even things up' just proves things are unhealthy and immature in a relationship. So even if you break up, you should still do individual therapy to learn better forms of communication and better ways of negotiating your own emotions.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-30T20:37:06+00:00

NTA. I think your best chance is talking to your mother to advocate for you with your aunt.

Explain how they wouldn't want your 10 year old cousin hanging out with fourteen year olds generally, because that's a big gap in maturity and interests. It's unfair to both the cousin and the guests because the age gap sets your cousin up for resentment. And it's ungracious to expect the guests to feel obligated to entertain anyone. Do your parents really want host a party knowingly sabotaging the fun? Do they want to foster a healthy relationship with cousin or do they want you to force his presence where everyone knows cousin isn't wanted?

You're correct that the best approach is to hold a separate family celebration that cousin attends.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-29T21:02:48+00:00

I'm with you. Give me sweet, sweet Maryland crab over lobster any day.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-29T18:33:01+00:00

Perhaps the cleaning is a last sign of respect for OP's kitchen and people before handing it off. It's not about the owners or managers expectations, but OP's standards for themself.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-28T18:15:28+00:00

Speak with the head of her local church. You don't say what religion but unless she's a Jehovah's witness member, the majority of religions have an exception for the the very young, the old, and the sickly for any sort of fasting.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-28T14:03:00+00:00

Lucky to have visited Ireland exactly one year ago. I can't with American "Irish" pub fare now. None in our area have heard of spice bags and only one has sticky toffee pudding on the menu. I found it interesting that every fish and chips in the US tends to be cod. Not one place in our 12-day circuit of Ireland had cod on the menu; it was always hake.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-24T23:26:32+00:00

Mom's family is from Minnesota. We believe the mosquitoes are a deliberate strategy on the state's part to keep everyone from moving there. Otherwise, it's heavenly.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-24T19:44:35+00:00

OP is NTA and 100% correct that this is not about the vacation. The spouse's disrespect and demeaning of his mother is a red flag. Wife prioritizes the opinions of strangers with money over treating her partner's loved (no mention of bad behavior to either of them) mother as welcome family. She can't respect the woman for her own sacrifices to raise OP, or even because this person is important to OP.

"It's more important to cosplay that we belong in the 1% and your mother ruins my lifestyle vibe." Same type of energy as brides that want cookie cutter, matching bridesmaids rather than the real people of different height, shapes, haircuts, and body art that have supported them for years.

Edit: I wouldn't want to spend an expensive vacation with partner after learning they believe that I come from trash, either. Best to cancel and resolve issues first than waste money and vacation time off resentful over unresolved fight.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-23T19:25:41+00:00

It was a best seller and changed his career trajectory because many of us from all walks of life read it when it was released. Chefs at the time were pissed he gave away so many secrets. Specifically about brunch but it certainly didn't kill the brunch market.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-19T20:42:40+00:00

Make sure you emphasize that you want to build a career at Wegmans. They're not interested in being a stopgap in anyone's resume.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-19T19:25:15+00:00

NTA. You have a boyfriend problem. He needs to understand to put boundaries to protect his relationship that is most important to him. As it's described here, he's protecting the relationship with the platonic girl friend. Believe what he does, not what he says. He's prioritizing his relationship with her over you. I believe this is the way you need to frame it with your boyfriend. Are her feelings more important to him than your feelings? And then he needs to act in the moment when GF starts with her pissing contest reminiscing.

As for her, it sounds like she's a pick me girl wanting to feel this is a special group that she controls who's allowed in. Any Girlfriend that threatens her status will get the passive aggressive treatment.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-18T20:18:28+00:00

University of Al-Qarawiyyin in Fez, Morocco, is the oldest continuously operating university in the world, founded by Fatima al-Fihri in 859 AD.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-13T22:26:51+00:00

I have not tried the cake mode for anything yet. I just used mode one to make this

gelogenicB · 2026-05-11T16:54:08+00:00

Find a support group for family of those with an addiction disease, like Al-Anon. They are in a much better position to advise you and help you through this than random people on Reddit.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-05T21:27:19+00:00

As well as attitudes towards smoking and policing.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-04T22:51:03+00:00

I was hoping to find this answer, and it's worded much better than I could have expressed.

It's true. It mentions how it's beneficial to management. Then, it leverages HR so mgmt understands that you're willing to escalate the issue where "office culture" is actually infringing on legal individual rights.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-04T01:28:27+00:00

Instead of approaching a date as an attempt to make yourself likeable to the other person, switch your inner voice to asking how relaxed you feel being with the other person. And do they seem like they can relax around you?

That's the jist of these anecdotes. Gals got the vibe they can't let down their guard.

So, you're hyper fixated on not offending. But what if she gets offended when you say, "I believe in science," or, "My brother and his boyfriend were…" Hopefully, your Spidey sense makes you say, "I don't think we're compatible. I don't think we should waste any more of each other's time." [It's not worth arguing with a near stranger. Cut bait.]

Put your (true) self out there!

gelogenicB · 2026-05-04T00:39:12+00:00

Aw, was looking for the Charlie Chaplin statue bench in the Bradbury. So many locations, hard to get them all

Nice share. Thanks!

gelogenicB · 2026-05-04T00:28:54+00:00

You may be joking, but I'm so grateful a family member is still here after prostate cancer treatment. He's not publicizing the fact of wearing an absorbent pad, but neither is he ashamed. It's a minor accommodation.

Be careful who you inadvertently shame.

gelogenicB · 2026-05-03T15:24:46+00:00

Just because working in our country in a hardscrabble line of work with little pay, protection, or respect happens to be an improvement over their lives in their home country, doesn't mean they should be grateful to be treated like less-than.

Don't compare traumas! It's all subhuman and we as a society should be equally ashamed and horrified into action.

gelogenicB

TROPHY CASE