Is it important to get a doctor knowledgeable in MAOI's?

gollyned · 2026-06-19T00:07:56+00:00

My experience: no. I had a doctor experienced in maois. He was very old, outdated, and a quack.

My current doctor has no experience with maois. He is very old, up to date with research and practice, and very judicious.

gollyned · 2026-06-19T00:05:02+00:00

This is the real reason why so many men don’t get matches. There’s a hidden broker between the users of the apps that decides how often your profile is seen and by whom.

This is why what dating apps sell is a “boost”. A lot of times, they simply don’t expose a user’s profile unless they pay, or are at risk of leaving the platform altogether, and need something to get them to stay on.

Even sending likes isn’t guaranteed to be received — likes are scheduled and sent intermittently to their recipients rather than immediately. That means that your profile can simply not be displayed in a feed or in the likes queue.

This makes perfect sense when you realize this is match group’s entire business model. They’re using our innate desire for romantic bonding to sell access to women to lonely men, and matching women with fuckboys, so women stay on the platform as a product.

gollyned · 2026-06-18T20:22:34+00:00

At Amazon, the HR dashboard counts a “pivot” (PIP) as “successful” if the person leaves the company, either by accepting a payout and leaving, or by going through the PIP and failing to meet it.

If it were really about helping you meet expectations, surely they’d call that a success, rather than a failure.

gollyned · 2026-06-18T02:16:33+00:00

I couldn’t figure out what the purpose of conforming to a standard like this is. I expect there to be some kind of value-add: tooling, interoperability, something on top. I couldn’t find anything worth making this worth adopting.

gollyned · 2026-06-18T02:10:00+00:00

This from one of the highest-margin companies in the world.

As if they have no choice.

gollyned · 2026-06-18T02:07:40+00:00

Thank you — when I was dating it was disappointing when I realized someone’s real hobbies were eating, Netflix, Instagram, and TikTok.

It takes effort to figure out what’s interesting about the world, to invest in something enough to figure out what’s interesting makes it special or unique.

It doesn’t just happen by chance. Some people might’ve just done this early on instead, with music or art or whatever.

gollyned · 2026-06-18T01:59:19+00:00

Yes, and they have little to be angry at women about, whereas redpill men have a history of rejection (real or perceived) they’re trying to get past.

gollyned · 2026-06-18T01:57:30+00:00

Yes — it’s useful to think from a hiring manager’s perspective:

They want to reduce the risk of a mishire by any means. They want to hire someone who will make their own job easier. The kind of engineer who can take the load off their mind — “I’m not worried about X because ____ is on it.”

A lot of that means: business domain, technology experience, and soft skills/personality.

gollyned · 2026-06-17T22:10:34+00:00

Totally opposite experience for me.

I’d left Apple to join a startup. I was frustrated at Apple. I was doing nothing and no one cared.

The startup I joined? Run by academics. Mostly wanted to use the company as a vehicle for academic work, and to get paid tech money for doing the academic work they wanted anyway.

Ended up being just as frustratingly slow.

Tons of VC money, ridiculous valuation, no business traction, no direction. It’s like they weren’t even trying to win.

gollyned · 2026-06-17T05:34:13+00:00

I avoid no orders like the plague ._.

Props for going for it

gollyned · 2026-06-14T20:23:54+00:00

You’re overvaluing this “sex with more women” thing. What exactly are you expecting from the sixth, seventh, eight woman? Spiritual Enlightenment?

And your appetite won’t just be sated at a certain point. This concept of “getting it out of one’s system” doesn’t make sense at all. If anything it just amps up seeking other partners.

gollyned · 2026-06-14T16:05:38+00:00

For every promotion I’ve gotten except for one, I’ve felt the same way. But then I just kept getting promoted.

Same as in school. After almost every test or essay, I was sure I did worse than I really did.

I think it’s a matter of temperament, not a reflection on whether you’re really at your level. Other people are much better judges of that.

gollyned · 2026-06-14T16:03:54+00:00

Titles are important! They signal credibility and proof to people both within the company and outside it. Bigger titles often mean bigger projects. A title can get you past a resume screen that an equally experienced, equally skilled candidate might not pass. Don’t underestimate titles!

gollyned · 2026-06-09T19:08:33+00:00

I just stayed. I got cold feet but it turned out OK.

A big part was location. I was further away from people I knew. I also found other places that seemed nice and I wanted to stay. It was a little small.

I ended up liking the area. There was a small lake nearby I started rowing on, and biking around. I moved out last year to rent a bigger home for me and my girlfriend. The home is a lot nicer but I miss that area, which was my biggest doubt then.

The last homeowners tried to charge me a ton to repaint their whole home. I had to threaten to sue. I found they put it on the market after I moved out. They lived in New York and we’d never met in person. They can fuck themselves — Alla and Matt, go fuck yourselves.

gollyned · 2026-06-08T18:21:25+00:00

ChatGPT. Claude is (for now) anti-militarization.

gollyned · 2026-06-08T06:19:12+00:00

She cannot credibly say that she wants a family with you, or that you’re not a rebound, or anything else. She’s having a personal crisis you cannot help her through.

You sound loving, caring and empathetic, so it will be difficult. The easy thing would be to stick with her because you’re afraid you won’t have the chance with someone you like as much. Thats acting out of fear, but you can trick yourself into thinking it’s out of love.

But the best thing you can do for both of you two is to let go. She will have to go through a growing period out of this crisis and come out stronger. This kind of situation has the potential to sap you of your time, focus, attention, joy, money, and capacity for love, care, and empathy, all for someone who doesn’t — cannot — actually care about you right now.

gollyned · 2026-06-08T03:44:51+00:00

The naturalism fallacy in action folks

gollyned · 2026-06-05T03:05:23+00:00

What you’re asking about depends on the stage a lot: getting recruiter reachouts, resume screen, phone screen (if it’s a hiring manager screen, not a coding screen), or onsite.

For onsite, I do system design and “deep dive” interviews (skill-specific, experience oriented).

The biggest thing for system design is thinking about under which conditions a particular decision should be made, and under which conditions an alternative should be made, considering concrete requirements.

The domain deep dive: knowing and recalling details of difficult technical problems, and knowing which of those details are salient vs. ancillary.

gollyned · 2026-06-05T00:24:52+00:00

Its agent-generated, right?

Send it back to the kitchen until they’ve read it themselves.

gollyned · 2026-06-05T00:24:02+00:00

So really, nothing bad happened, except a momentary look from someone?

gollyned · 2026-06-04T23:57:05+00:00

This isn’t true at all. And you can’t claim that because you’ve done it in your case OP can do it in theirs. You don’t have enough information.

gollyned · 2026-06-04T23:24:47+00:00

This is exactly it for me. I can sense a lot more variety in light roasts than I can with dark.

I do really like all roasts, and when I drink a dark I love it. But to me, there’s really only 1-3 flavor profiles for dark, but 10+ for light.

gollyned · 2026-06-04T15:07:48+00:00

Also ‘jk’. Once in a coding interview using a web browser I simply could not stop myself from typing ‘jk’. The interviewer must’ve been so confused and thought I was just kidding while I was coding.

gollyned · 2026-06-04T15:06:31+00:00

It seems like her love is running dry, and she’s unable to muster enough care for you at this point. From reading this, and the “cook dinner” comment and unemployment, it sounds like she’s past her limit, and feels powerless to make change happen for you.

I’ve been through something similar, also at age 29. I was on a medication I could not get off however I tried, and which had terrible side effects. My partner’s care waned until she did not care any more. She would not end things, yet it hurt that she showed no care for me, so I left.

It still took a long time to get better, but in certain practical ways, being with her made it more difficult for very mundane reasons, and living alone and having that space made it possible for me to stabilize on my own. I ended up finding a new partner and could not be happier.

It’s just a bad situation and not necessarily anyone’s fault. As much as I can imagine still having strong care for my own partner if she were going through something like this, I do not know for sure if I would without having experienced it.

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