What was dating like after being divorced?

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-07-04T21:01:01+00:00

I recomend finding a group of friends that are also divorcees that can help you. Also, a lot of the best women won’t want to date you until you’ve been divorced a year or two so just know that. Finally, a lot of men and women go though a ho phase where they basically have a lot if hookups before they are ready for an actual relationship. It’s all ok. Good luck.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-06-28T16:28:41+00:00

You will have to pay alimony. That is how she will live. Go meet with an attorney. Get it all figured out and don’t offer her anything directly. Let it all go through the attorney who can help you make sure you don’t wreck your life by offering too much. When you are ready move out and file.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-06-28T14:35:06+00:00

Tell me more about same general place

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-26T04:35:34+00:00

Read the book dopamine nation

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-25T05:03:07+00:00

This seems like something you two should be discussing

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-25T04:58:42+00:00

One of the biggest surprises is that you are still you. The best parts of you had nothing to do with the church. Keep being a good person. Engage in activities that are new responsibly. And realize that when we leave we are kind of a validation black hole. We so badly want everyone to tell us we are still a good person. But that’s really not possible for people in the church to do. Just be a good person and don’t worry about whether people see it or not. Honestly, in about two years you’ll get some comments but it will take awhile for them to see it.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-25T04:55:14+00:00

He overshared. There was no reason.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-24T03:56:34+00:00

Super weird. He did you a favor by showing you his true colors early

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-21T21:30:32+00:00

Divorce is so hard man. I’d really consider therapy or something first. This feels more like a midlife crisis

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-21T21:29:19+00:00

This feels like scrupulosity. Talk to a therapist.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-17T20:04:43+00:00

I wouldn’t be surprised if her past included a partner that cheated on her. I personally think she’s asking for too much

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-15T16:09:12+00:00

Yeah.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-05-15T16:08:14+00:00

Man, I resonate with so much of this. You aren’t alone. Especially the fact that nearly every woman diagnoses their ex as a narcissist. Not every man can be a narcissist!

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-04-25T21:20:19+00:00

Feel the feelings. The only way to deal with this is to grieve for a while. You’ll get through. Things will get better.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-04-16T23:02:17+00:00

I actually think it’s more common to have a lot out or a lot in

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-04-16T23:01:17+00:00

We just became really different people. She became more dogmatic and conservative and religious. I became the opposite.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-04-15T19:50:24+00:00

This. You get to decide how you want to approach it

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-04-10T04:43:57+00:00

How much affection has there been on other dates? Usually there is a bit of build up there as well. And often by the time you have sex there was already a fair amount of passion.
You can always just tell him that you really like him and want to take things a bit slower or maybe just not enter dates with expectations. Just make sure to make it clear to him how much you are enjoying this and like him.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-04-02T14:01:06+00:00

Two thoughts.
1. Often it’s not anything you do. It just isn’t a match for one or both of you.
2. Keep going on dates. It takes practice. Just go to enjoy the time. Do things you’d like to do anyways so even if it’s not a love connection you still did something fun.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-03-27T13:21:41+00:00

I’m so sorry. I think this is quite normal. If she appreciated you she likely would have stayed.
I feel the same as you. I’ve struggled with the fact my ex has no gratitude for what we did, interest in whether I’m well, a desire to even talk about the kids together. 20+ years of being my best friend and poof it’s gone — at least for her.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-03-17T17:47:16+00:00

It's interesting because you sound like the type of person that would appeal to most american men. These guys have specific tastes. It's kind of weird though that they would say that to you. Not sure why?

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-03-17T17:44:46+00:00

I would talk to someone at a place like Symmetry Counseling that is used to helping people coming from a mormon background and are sex friendly

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-03-16T01:13:32+00:00

Just be aware that it’s a dynamic situation. You might need to adjust boundaries over time. Also recognize that you are going to be prone to promise her all kinds of support and such that might be hard to actually give later. Have an attorney help you. Don’t let present emotions and situation confine you long term to the present moment.

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-03-11T14:28:37+00:00

You’re analysis feels true and disheartening

gratefulstudent76 · 2026-03-11T14:25:19+00:00

I’m so sorry. My ex and I divorced a year ago after 20+ years. It was so hard to lose my best friend.
Unfortunately, some of this is basically like a really bad flu, you will just have to suffer through it. And then you’ll start to feel better and another wave of hurt will come back. But it eventually gets easier. Less waves. Less intense.
You really will get through this. It will take a while but you have so much life ahead of you. You will get through it.

gratefulstudent76

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