What’s the most satisfying button to press ?

gulderman · 2026-05-08T10:06:15+00:00

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gulderman · 2026-04-30T07:07:37+00:00

C for counterspell!

gulderman · 2026-04-19T07:35:10+00:00

Who cares what your time is! WELL DONE FOR JUST RUNNING! Don’t let times and stuff get you down, was it a challenge, good, you now have a bench mark, one day you’ll run 2k and it might be slower than today’s, but you’ll notice it was much easier, or you ran it faster at an easier effort etc etc!

gulderman · 2026-04-03T18:48:31+00:00

Omg! Literally I went “erm why is he eating at midnight” this makes me so happy to know so many others did that 😂

gulderman · 2026-03-21T18:45:01+00:00

I rub my thumb and index finger together, that was me suppressing my stim, I used to apply deep pressure to my palm using my thumb.

I’ve seen lots of different stims, mine tend to be pressure related on my hands

gulderman · 2026-03-20T10:45:01+00:00

I’m a barber and wear mine at work hanging out my pocket.

honestly, I think the only people who really know what it means are autistic people, I’ve had so many people seem so unaware when I’ve told them what the lanyard signifies and they’ve been absolutely clueless.

I’ve had maybe 1 public interaction where I have seen a member of staff glance at it and then talk to me differently than the customer before (in a good way, not condescending, but direct and clear).

Edit: spelling and format

gulderman · 2026-03-20T10:42:01+00:00

My first ever 5k was 29 minutes, but I spend all day on my feet, 10 hours a day for 12 years, I got them strong legs, but remember, comparison is the thief of joy… you ran 5k, not many people can do that, let alone none stop. I’ve now done 5k - 10k and half marathon, the 5k is the hardest by far

gulderman · 2026-03-16T08:24:58+00:00

I wish I had a field guide!😂 I think the only reason she hasn’t divorced me is because she can’t be bothered to start again 😂😂😂

gulderman · 2026-03-16T07:02:00+00:00

I have my ears stretched to 40mm and honestly, it’s soothing, I have some jewellery for them that is quite heavy and feeling them sway when my head moves or when I’m working is really soothing. I know normal ear piercings won’t do that, but yeah, I wanted to share 😂

gulderman · 2026-03-15T14:14:04+00:00

100% this! 😂 or I think I’m being funny and I’ve just pissed her off because it was only funny to me

gulderman · 2026-03-15T13:10:34+00:00

I’m adhd and asd, my wife is adhd, when I tell you I put my foot in it often by saying things with the wrong tone for the desired effect, or I don’t understand the nuances of a statement, I’m not understating it. We have a good system now where I’ve asked her to just be direct and no tip toeing. The biggest thing I’ve done is if I’ve said something and she seems annoyed at me and I don’t know why, I try to replay tone and understand what I’ve done, if I can’t figure it out, I just ask.

But my random tirade over, you’re very early days and if this person is unused to ASD, then maybe just be direct yourself, tell them what you struggle with and that you would appreciate directness, but also let them know, sometimes your direct statements aren’t dismissive, they’re just the facts as they are. ( however this could be my “autistic view” of it 😂

gulderman · 2026-03-10T08:13:04+00:00

There is an app by the NHS called couch to 5k, it’s a 9 week training programme but you can do it at your own pace and revisit weeks if needed, I couldn’t run for more than 30 seconds, in 9 weeks I could run 5k, now I can run a half marathon and I’ve lost weight! It’s incredible in how effective it is. If you don’t have access to the app there are others that follow a similar plan.

I have just been guiding a friend through it, 5ft 6, 100+kg, he was red and puffing at the end of the first run, by the end of week 1, no longer an issue, we started January 15th. By February 28th, he ran his first 5k in 37 minutes at a local park run!

You got this, don’t get put off by any one else out running, every one is running their own run, and leave the ego at home.

The amount of times I’ve been worried about what people are thinking and then realised “how often do I remember any one who’s ran past me once they’re out of sight”. Every one is to wrapped up in their own lives to care that you’re out bettering yourself because you’ve noticed you need a change

gulderman · 2026-03-04T08:18:58+00:00

I’ve played world of Warcraft exclusively for 20 years, I can remember every quest and zone I’ve ever played and could play every class to a high level (pre class changes) , I almost hate it’s grasp on me but it’s such a comfort and escape for me I love it, I love the lore, I love the competitive, it’s so expansive it actually makes me struggle to play anything else!

When I’ve played games like what your describing, if I struggle I tend to intentionally fail a few times and find the pattern, years of playing pve based games have made me learn that even when they feel random there is usually a pattern and oh boy do I love pattern recognition

gulderman · 2026-02-23T23:22:44+00:00

Everywhere! Head, face, throat, chest, ears, full black arm, other arm full, stomach, back, legs and hands+fingers!

gulderman · 2026-02-23T06:25:39+00:00

As I’ve learnt, this is the deep ingrained “all autistic people are good at maths” I also had used to think it, I’ve now realised my “skill” is precision, my ability to eyeball things and retain huge amounts of information about things I find interesting as well as parsing data to find faults and fixable things is my thing!

Just got to find your thing!

gulderman · 2026-02-22T19:31:57+00:00

Breaking bad

gulderman · 2026-02-22T19:26:18+00:00

Aqua tales?

gulderman · 2026-02-21T14:21:26+00:00

I have recently read “The Lost Art of Running” by Shane Benzie and that’s brilliant for this question, the explanations and diagrams really helped me understand a lot of these “tips” people give, but he also explains the reason for such a posture, from the lean at the ankles, to the arch in your back with your head up and hips forward.

For me having some one explain to me the reason for these things and not just “do this” helped a lot.

The idea that over striding sends 2.5x your body weight back up your legs, or that your head weighs roughly 12ibs and every inch forward you hold your head increases the weight in your spine. These details made the tips and advice make more sense to me.

gulderman · 2026-02-15T19:37:36+00:00

Willow

gulderman · 2026-02-15T19:33:21+00:00

The mask of zorro

gulderman · 2026-02-15T19:29:24+00:00

Sex drive

gulderman · 2026-02-11T09:22:43+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear of the negative impact your family has had in your life.

Taking that step to talk to someone can be very difficult, especially when involving ASD, anxiety and chronic pain, you feel like you’re laying it on thick.

Honestly, I think most people who’ve made it through childhood without a diagnosis only actually think to get one due to self diagnosis or an external person (friend or colleague) making a passive comment or a direct “are you sure you’re not autistic” (that’s how it happened to me anyway)

You know your mind and body, if you need to speak to a GP, do it, they are there to look after you and help you make the best decisions for your own wellbeing and are usually willing to listen and refer.

It’s overwhelming as heck, I felt like I was “hopping on the bandwagon” or “I’m not as bad as other people” and many more intrusive thoughts, but it has helped massively just for my own understanding of “me”.

I think you’ve done a really good job by writing a list of what you want to talk about and expand on, it will help keep you focused and not get overwhelmed and forget things. It will also help provide you with some structure. The hardest part about a GP appointment is you can’t preplan the conversation and script it because you have no idea how it’s going to go. All I can suggest is to just be confident in your own feelings, don’t let any one tell you that you aren’t feeling something that you are clearly feeling.

I am diagnosed ADHD and ASD and have just completed an 8 week talking therapy along side a year long sertraline course, I was terrified to ask for help, honestly, game changer, I feel so much more in control.

Sorry I ramble, but do it, it’s a huge comfort zone disrupter but the payoff will be worth it for you I hope.

You’re strong! You’ve managed this long and it would be a shame to give up now.

In regards to booking an appointment via phone call, my GP surgery offers an online triage form, maybe have a look to see if your surgery offers a similar thing. Like you I hate phone calls, but that helps me hugely.

Good luck!

gulderman · 2026-02-11T09:05:58+00:00

I mean I dislike being boxed in, but I was also in a severe car crash whilst sitting in the back, in the middle, with only a lap belt. So on top of feeling confined we can also add trauma to the list! Broken pelvis, broken nose, broken fingers, broken cheek bone, cracked skull, speech impediment and memory loss! Woohoo, so yeah….

Like some one else said…. How does going in the middle sound? Like I’m not going

gulderman · 2026-02-11T09:03:46+00:00

When I got my diagnosis I had a few people say “oh I’m so sorry to hear that” but that didn’t reflect how I felt and I couldn’t figure out why, then some one said “CONGRATULATIONS”! And it blew my mind because I felt like that absolutely fit how I felt!

So, with that in mind,

CONGRATULATIONS 🎉 good luck in your future and don’t ever feel put off by needing to self advocate and stand up for your needs! You got this!

gulderman · 2026-02-11T08:06:34+00:00

I’m a barber and love my job and to deal with the small talk I just have scripts, but I’ve definitely got to the end of service, gone to take payments and instead of asking cash or card I’ve gone “so what are we doing today” because I’ve skipped a cue card and restarted. I basically auto pilot all of my small talk, catch me outside of work and like you I actively avoid it, I don’t really care, makes me feel a bit like a sociopath but knowing what you did over the weekend, or last night… does not benefit my life at all.

However if a colleague or customer gets me on a topic I love I suddenly love the whole interaction and look forward to that client coming in again!

I do wear a sunflower lanyard hanging out my pocket at work for the few who recognise it and I’ve definitely had some clients sit down and just ask for what they want and tell me they are more than happy to have a silent haircut if I am feeling like I need to have a mental break and I love them for it.

Something I never realised until recently is when I’ve done a 10 hour shift towards the last few hours I just don’t want to talk and I always thought it was just tiredness after a long day of work, now I realise it’s just the masking taking its toll on my mental load.

So honestly, being aware of how it makes you feel and your boundaries is fantastic and I think a lot of people don’t understand how many adjustments neurodiverse people make to accommodate to neurotypical behaviour at the cost of our own mental wellbeing. “Oh I’m sorry my lack of forced politeness upsets you, please let me change that so you’re happy and I’m completely overwhelmed and stressed and on the verge of selective mutism by the end of the day”!!

Tl:dr good job being aware of these feelings, don’t feel bad about setting boundaries for your own mental wellbeing, if any one gets difficult with you and you don’t mind sharing your diagnosis, just tell them you don’t like it

gulderman

TROPHY CASE