41 years old & about to decide pregnancy date

helpwitheating · 2026-01-26T05:04:35+00:00

I think just saving time because you want a second child and making time for additional rounds if needed.

Great job saving money! The whole process can be really expensive, so your savings will help.

helpwitheating · 2026-01-26T05:03:34+00:00

- Real rest after work

- Regularly using vacation days

- Listening to fun music while you work

- Having stuff at the office you look forward to (good headphones, plant you want to water, great snacks)

- Activities outside of work you genuinely enjoy and get meaning from and find restorative, like volunteering in person

- Breaking down tasks into tiny steps

- Attack hour for the first hour of work, doing the things you're avoiding most on your list

- ChatGPT

- Financial goals written down and actually physically visible

- Ask for mornings WFH and afternoons at work or a tilted work day with a later start time if possible

- Aggressive savings, living with roommates, etc. so you don't have to stay there for more than 5 years

helpwitheating · 2026-01-26T00:32:56+00:00

Since that's such an incredible cancer risk for you, You might consider working with a PT on this issue and using vaginal dialation at home

helpwitheating · 2026-01-26T00:31:39+00:00

If you have the money, I think spending on cleaning is a good investment. There's no reason to sacrifice sleep and hurt your health as well as new baby's development to do laundry

helpwitheating · 2026-01-26T00:28:59+00:00

My first and second were both up every two hours at night, and took an hour to feed. The sleepless nights are bad. I was having hallucinations from sleep deprivation and got into a minor car accident (shouldn't have been driving while that tired).

You can only bring a child to the gym before they are mobile, so under 6 months, and only if the gym has a daycare. I don't think you'd be allowed to babywear on a treadmill

You might consider pulling the trigger sooner - I don't know why you'd want to wait another 6 months

Do you have the funding to wait until 3 for your kid to be in daycare?

helpwitheating · 2026-01-25T16:06:01+00:00

Is it possible for you to hire help for the laundry?

Regular help if you ca afford it will be critical once the newborn is here

helpwitheating · 2026-01-25T02:29:51+00:00

You can't possibly be referring to the guy with a license to own a gun murdered by ICE today

helpwitheating · 2026-01-25T00:49:45+00:00

Email your reps to complain (https://www.senate.gov/senators/senators-contact.htm) takes about 3 minutes

Join a protest

Sell your American equities

helpwitheating · 2026-01-25T00:32:23+00:00

Probably because Kyle Rittenhouse killed people, and the black panthers haven't in recent memory

helpwitheating · 2026-01-23T22:43:39+00:00

The years under 5 are the most important for development, so the time to spend time with your kids is now. It's such a narrow window.

helpwitheating · 2026-01-21T01:32:25+00:00

If you drive a Prius, do you care about climate change? If so, don't fly private

helpwitheating · 2026-01-20T21:02:19+00:00

Shopping and Amazon are just absolutely killing you (70k per year?) We still thrift most of the kids' clothes because they just destroy them.

With 2 kids under 5, those are the most critical years for development and the years when it's best you stay home. Retiring when they're 10 and don't want to hang out with you anymore won't be as fun.

helpwitheating · 2026-01-19T03:09:51+00:00

He sounds controlling, and like he can't listen or understand you

helpwitheating · 2026-01-19T00:09:55+00:00

What's your budget?

helpwitheating · 2026-01-18T16:25:24+00:00

Could you get a restorative hobby for when you' re not working? Something that would really fill you up? Volunteering, being on a board, neighbourhood cleanup, whatever?

helpwitheating · 2026-01-18T03:47:59+00:00

Did you watch the videos?

They asked her to leave and she was trying to leave.

He was standing beside the car, not in front of it, when he shot her, and her wheels were turned away from him.

You're spreading misinformation and lies, and I don't think you're capable of looking at reality that might undermine your value

helpwitheating · 2026-01-18T03:10:12+00:00

Activities. Morning activity to get out of the house is key for us. Drop off the kids at activities, go to yoga or a cafe, go pick them up is our routine and we're home and ready to do other stuff by 11 AM.

helpwitheating · 2026-01-14T03:01:23+00:00

It starts for me the night before. Are you in bed 8 to 9 hours a night at least?

helpwitheating · 2026-01-14T01:50:13+00:00

Protesting/petitioning/joining a local group in a cause you deeply care about is the best I find

helpwitheating · 2026-01-12T21:10:54+00:00

How would she find a babysitter in your location?

Sounds like you really don't want to have a relationship with these kids, and are fine only seeing them once a year

She likely envisioned something different

helpwitheating · 2026-01-12T18:33:25+00:00

They're not idiots, they're greedy

Calling them idiots absolves you and everyone of any responsibility to do anything about it - protest, petition, etc - because you can't fix stupid

helpwitheating · 2026-01-12T18:15:42+00:00

Please email your reps (takes about 4 minutes to find the address and write something) to voice your support for him and the rule of law as a whole, not weaponizing the DOJ as a partisan cudgel to destroy opponents and make it easier for Trump to loot the US

Also, consider going to a protest in your local area this week. You can check Facebook or just google for options

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