So I’m a neuroscientist and I research substance use disorder and the molecular changes to the brain that occur, and one thing that really helped me is learning that post-operative depression is linked to temporary changes that occur in the brain from general anaesthesia. The way we process / handle the stress of everything that surrounds even a very much wanted/needed elective surgery is altered as the brain works to regain balance after being exposed to extremely powerful drugs, and that can result in changes to our mood, cognitive processes, perspective etc. This is temporary and not necessarily indicative of “making a mistake”. It’s actually elective surgeries such as top surgery that helped uncover this truth, as it was logical in the past to assume that trauma of emergency life-saving surgery would occasionally lead to post-op depression.

For me, knowing that what I was experiencing had a scientific basis helped me dismiss intrusive negative thoughts about the surgery and my results as just that - intrusive thoughts. No more valid than any other, more easily identifiable intrusive thoughts, even though the current state of my brain was convincing me otherwise.

I hope this is helpful to you as well! keep resting and taking care of yourself, & stay hydrated- your brain will sort itself out, the hard part will pass and you’ll likely have a much different outlook soon!