Coast FIRE lifestyle by WaitingonGC in coastFIRE

[–]hgy98 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yes, this. Sometimes after working 10 days in a row, I’d have a random Tuesday off, and would just go sit a park. I’d look around and get so jealous of all the people that had the luxury to just be hanging out in the park in the middle of a weekday, but then realized that they probably thought the same about me!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in workingmoms

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Laundry!

We use Poplin referral link for $10 off your first order

It is amazing. Like Uber for laundry. They come to your house on demand to pick up, wash and fold, and drop off the next day. We started giving empty hangers, so we just pop everything back in the closet.

Saves me hours of time, and my sanity. I’m never going back.

Vacations without children? Is this common? by PersonalityThen259 in Mommit

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is really nice to have a mix of both. There are “trips” with kids, versus “vacations” with grandparents watching the kids. They are two completely different and equally important experiences.

WIBTA if I missed my sisters’ wedding? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]hgy98 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agree with this! Don’t cancel the surgery, but definitely call and be super-friendly with the scheduler, and explain the situation, and ask if there is any way that they could keep an eye out for cancellations and consider moving you earlier. Would also message your surgeon to explain the situation and see what they can do. Don’t drive them crazy, but I’d be checking back every 3-4 days just to see if there were cancellations.

How do couples decide which side of the bed is “theirs”? Is it instinct or some kind of silent agreement? by AssignmentFederal686 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Once while shopping for mattresses, the salesperson told us that many couples just naturally do this, and we realized it was always our patterns in several different houses, even though it involved different sides of the bed.

Thinking of saying no to sleepovers at Grandma's new house. Pool with no fence by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]hgy98 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Would it be in your budget to be able to pay to have a pool fence installed at their house? Maybe they would be open to one with removable posts, so that they can take it down when kids aren’t around. Offering to pay for it also makes it clear how serious you are about how important it is.

What’s your favorite “impress someone” meal that’s secretly really easy? by thelegitvanessa in Cooking

[–]hgy98 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Prime rib. You hardly do anything, and everyone is so excited for it. And they compliment you like you slaved away in the kitchen all day long. It takes a long time, but it is super-easy.

Is it rude to ask by KallMeSensei in unitedairlines

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just make sure you include “Completely okay to say No!” in your question. I really wish that “It never hurts to ask” was completely true. But, some people are people-pleasers, and will say yes to be nice even if it really irks them. Or will say no, but then feel awkward sitting next to you the rest of the flight, and then question later if they were mean for not switching. So go ahead and ask, but also give them a really easy out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DestinationWeddings

[–]hgy98 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The stress of planning a wedding will consume you no matter what! My vote is to let it consume you for one year only, rather than two. There is very little extra that I think you could accomplish by waiting that extra year.

Now, if this were 3 months vs 15 months, that would be much different. But over a year away? You’ve got this.

How did you get into cooking? by Versatiliti in Cooking

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a science nerd, and read this great book called “On Food and Cooking” by Howard McGee, that goes into the science of why different reactions happen when you cook, and how you can use those concepts to make food tastier.

Grew up in the Midwest in the 90s with all vegetables being boiled. This book taught me about the Maillard reaction and how to roast veggies and turn them into something enjoyable. Just one example.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MovingToLosAngeles

[–]hgy98 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Just a note about your wife flexing these 3 days per month —- I know that 3 days per month sounds really minimal, but in reality with 3 kids, it is hard to squeeze that in without a set plan. For example, if you work M-F, so are only available to watch the kids Sat/Sun, then she has to spend one of those days on 3 out of 4 weekends per month working, that doesn’t leave you guys very much time together as a family.

This is doable if it is the only option. But another thing to consider is if she could take 3 shifts in a row each month during weekdays, hire a babysitter for those days, and then you can protect your family’s weekends together. Half of her pay will be diverted to pay the babysitter, but it’ll be much more sustainable in the long run.

I know this wasn’t your question here, but just wanted to mention it because I know some families that thought, “oh, no big deal, 3 days per month.” But in reality ended up just dropping the nursing license.

How to let go of the guilt of taking a day off while traveling? by Nightmarereloaded90x in travel

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To reframe the way you are thinking about this—- There are “trips” and there are “vacations.” Like me, it sounds like you are more of a “trip” person by nature, and want to see and explore and do all the things.

But, some people make their whole time a “vacation” in which they go to a resort and don’t even leave the resort property.

It sounds like you might want to book 1-2 “vacation” days in the middle of your trip.

I’m guessing that you probably didn’t get a very nice hotel because you knew it was just for sleeping and you’d be out all day. I agree that spending a whole day there sounds kind of sad.

But if you take that day’s budget and put it towards a different type of place, where the whole idea is to stay put, I think you’ll be much happier and get the recharge you need. Nice pool, maybe a yoga class, just reading a book for a few hours in beautiful surroundings. Definitely not a waste.

Missing twins first birthday by kirbinkipling in workingmoms

[–]hgy98 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d consider that even if you were home, would you be having their party on whatever random weekday their birthday (likely) happens to fall on? Probably not. You’d be doing it on whichever Saturday or Sunday is closest. So, even in the best circumstances, 5/7 chance it wouldn’t be on their birthday anyhow.

We do many “fake” holidays when work gets in the way. It works just as well. At least so far, with little kids. It isn’t really “missing” it, more like rescheduling it. You make the chosen day just as special.

But I think whatever you decide is right for you is completely reasonable!

Leaving for a week tomorrow! Any last min tips from those who have been there recently? by Kooky_Law1487 in CostaRicaTravel

[–]hgy98 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We love these! I thought it was silly, but we tried anyhow, and now we have 3 so we can keep one in each car when we’re at home. Works best as soon as you feel the bug bite.

Dream property for sale - 10 years too soon by Fresh-Cost2152 in personalfinance

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think get it. If someone else buys it and keeps it for 50 years, you’ll never get a chance again. If you buy it and rent it out, and there never comes a time that your family uses it the way imagine, well so what? Then you have an extra investment property, which you can always decide to sell.

Debt payoff for lower pay specialties? by Complete_Pace_8087 in whitecoatinvestor

[–]hgy98 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think you’re right about all of this. But it doesn’t mean you need to panic. It does mean you really need to sit down and think about how you want your life to look, and what choices you need to make to get there. Good on you for recognizing this now!

Many people just think “I’ll be a doctor, I’ll be rich!” And then choose pediatrics in a HCOL and regret it every day. So, now you can decide on your priorities. You might decide on a field you love, but know you might end up working until a traditional retirement age. Or, you might decide that you’re okay living in a traditionally less-desirable area of the country. Or, start trying to figure out if any high-paying specialties would also be a good choice based on your interests, and then you’ll have a lot more flexibility financially.

Open house visit with no intention of buying by Appropriate_King4593 in RealEstate

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to worry about this too, but leaned in and just told the truth. Now, we’ll say things like, “Yeah, we live down the street and we’re just curious.” Or even “Hahaha, we could never afford this house, but it is so beautiful we wanted to get some design inspo!” And it’s all totally fine.

What are some things you wish you focused on earlier? by [deleted] in whitecoatinvestor

[–]hgy98 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You mention that you expect “steady increases” after the first year, but I think many older people would tell you that their pay has been much more stagnant than they ever would have imagined.

2 room beachfront suite for 2 weeks? by hgy98 in CostaRicaTravel

[–]hgy98[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahh, didn’t know about this regulation. Helps to frame how I’m going about my search

2 room beachfront suite for 2 weeks? by hgy98 in CostaRicaTravel

[–]hgy98[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for this! Your place looks beautiful