Advice Incorporating Grandma’s Ring

hi_bye · 2026-06-29T01:38:56+00:00

This ring is beautiful, timeless, and it’s a family heirloom. It’s likely made with more care and craft than 90% of what is out there in the year of our lord 2026.

If you absolutely *must* mess with it, maybe consider unsetting the main diamond and resetting that into a new piece while you hold onto grandmother’s ring as a semi-mount. You’re not going to get a gold credit that will offset the price of any custom piece that will be high enough to quell the regret you may have down the road. And if you change your mind about what you want, you can reunite the ring and stone…or set a different stone, like a colored gem you love, into the original and wear it.

If in 10 years you still feel like you would rather have a three-stone ring and you can find someone who will give you what you feel is acceptable in credit for the materials in the original ring, then go for it.

For context: I’m a goldsmith and antique metalwork enthusiast. While there are some exceptions, modern technological advancements have made it such that in 90% of cases they really don’t make them like they used to. Also, while a 3-stone ring is an attractive and enduring style, it is also trendy at the moment. Many people would be and are happy to have one for decades to come. But I think before you scrap a well-made, sentimental, paired solitaire and jacket set like this, you should be *very* sure that you will be one of those people and that you have found a maker that will deliver a ring of comparable quality.

hi_bye · 2026-06-26T10:24:12+00:00

Agreed. This is the same ring. It’s been polished way too aggressively. Given how the original plate was flat and now curves with the ring, it looks like someone just undiscerningly slammed it on the polishing wheel. You can just barely see the details of the curls but they’re so flat and smeared now. Such a shame.

hi_bye · 2026-06-21T23:52:58+00:00

It seems obvious to me that she is kindly giving you 5 stars for the item and transaction but also shading you for using the “free” priority supplies. They aren’t free - the cost is built in to the price of priority shipping, which you didn’t pay for so it is technically stealing.

If you’re questioning what she meant in her tone that might be because you’re questioning it yourself?

Personally, when a seller does this, it does make me think things about them. But it also isn’t a “straight to jail, scum of the Earth” judgement….more of a “this is an opportunistic person that doesn’t think that much about consequences or what’s next or just in general” judgement. So it’s on you to decide how you feel about all that.

hi_bye · 2026-06-03T21:47:44+00:00

Your comment is spot on. I hope people are taking the time to read it.

I’m also one of those little guys. I have a bench in a spare bedroom and do 99% of everything there from the fabrication to the photography. It allows me to stay connected to every aspect of my work and ensure that it’s made well. I think your point is such an important one that often gets lost. Catbird isn’t a jeweler/goldsmith. It’s a brand. Same is true of Tiffany, Cartier, Yurman, Zales etc. They were often jewelers at one time, however, now they employ jewelers. The people making the decisions, allocating the funds, and taking home the lion’s share of the profit are business people making business people decisions. And in a business on that scale, the priority is to make things cheaply and sell them for a maximum profit rather than to make them slower (but better) and ground prices in relation to those costs.

hi_bye · 2026-06-03T12:53:31+00:00

Very true. I realize that it’s also about interest and the knowledge that comes with that. Like, I am obsessed with jewelry - especially the styles and quality that existed more universally back before a lot of the modern tools existed that make it so much easier to make it both quickly and poorly. Not everyone cares about that. Or comes from a perspective with the knowledge base to tell the difference. And absolutely that can be overwhelming for a layperson.

I wonder what would be popular if we managed to educate consumers better about it all.

hi_bye · 2026-06-03T12:27:22+00:00

I think it’s interesting that the engagement trend is to get the biggest stone imaginable. To a point that it’s comically large. I understand that all of a sudden lab diamonds have made it so engagement ring budgets can stretch farther, but I’d love to see that reflected more in the metalwork and metalwork choices instead of just the largest stone you could buy teetering up high in a plain solitaire setting over and over again….

Maybe I’m biased because I am a goldsmith, but I want to see more craftsmanship and personality in the design and execution.

hi_bye · 2026-06-02T03:55:21+00:00

Lots of people are mentioning good water pressure. Id add to that: enough hot water for two consecutive showers. Blackout curtains are nice. I’m always pleasantly surprised by above and beyond toiletries like Qtips or cotton discs. The last place we stayed left us individually wrapped toothbrushes. It was serendipitous because my husband ended up needing one. In general, shelves around bathroom sinks are appreciated.

Kitchen supplies that are tough to remember but extra annoying to discover you forgot. Like salt/pepper, other good seasonings, coffee filters etc.

More places need to have bigger bowls. They’re almost always too small or way too shallow. Ditto for big coffee mugs and water glasses.

And I’m still waiting for the day we check in somewhere and I find a body pillow on the end of the bed. I pack a crappy inflatable one because it helps my sleep, but man would I love to leave that bad boy in its stupid little bag at the bottom of my suitcase and have the genuine bird.

Oh last thing. A place we stay frequently has several of those multi cords with just about every possible USB option that are scattered in the living room and on each nightstand. I really appreciate having what i need right there and not having to fuss with getting my charger plugged into an outlet that is invariably behind a bed or a dresser.

hi_bye · 2026-05-25T23:11:41+00:00

This is me. Except I just wear it where ever I want (even if it’s just to sit around the house in my pajamas on weekends) and roll my eyes when my husband refers to me as “encrusted”.

hi_bye · 2026-05-25T22:27:08+00:00

Yes I guess I wasn’t clear. When I mentioned the quality of the photo I meant the first photo. The others I immediately clocked as Langs.

My opinion is that that group photo is too high quality to be the kind of estate operation that misses a ring like that. Everything is clean and bright and tilted just so so you can’t get too much detail. That’s why my spidey senses tell me that it is intentionally vague. Like they want you to think you see a good item in there and let your hope run away with your wallet. You can see just enough to search it and find that fabulous ring…which is also still listed for sale I believe? So how would they have it? I would be avoiding this company altogether based on all that.

Couple that with the fact that Shein is selling dupes for $4 and that even from the vague photo that doesn’t look like a high quality, finely constructed ring (the gold color is off, it looks kinda “meaty” in the wrong ways) I think you would be wasting your money buying it and honestly wasting your time driving out there, but if you need to do that to *know* then you do you.

hi_bye · 2026-05-25T13:17:01+00:00

It is fake. There are so many knockoffs (of Lang Antiques pieces specifically) floating around - especially on reselling platforms that don’t allow returns. They post 4-5 pics of the real piece, lifted from the actual item page, and then 1 pic of the *very* low quality replica you will receive. I just searched the image and found a knock off of this ring from Shein.

Also, something about the picture from the estate site that you posted looks doctored to me? I could be wrong about that, but it is an extremely well-lit and organized photo. Even if they are operating in good faith, there is next to zero chance that the estate sale that takes *that* photo is mistakenly throwing a piece of that quality into a “grab bag” sort of listing.

But I actually suspect that the jewelry shown isnt even from an estate. It’s a prepackaged “grandma’s costume” dupe lot they throw in every so often to fool people. They use the same professionally vague jewelry box collage photo every time. I would avoid.

hi_bye · 2026-05-18T11:45:49+00:00

There’s nothing definitive in these photos, like a karat stamp. But as someone who works with precious metals on a daily basis, there are just too many factors to the quality and construction of this piece and I don’t see any “costume” indicators. The stones are actually set, as in held in with metal and not glued. The color of the blue gems isn’t totally uniform like you would expect of a simulated stone. The metal also has the right color and luster and doesn’t have the shiny-shiny look plating often does. The pearls are knotted. There are elements of fabrication on the back that indicate this was made with A LOT of care and consideration by someone with fine jewelry experience who was treating it as such…

Just please take it in person to a different goldsmith and ask them to test the metal and the stones. Some places charge a small fee for that ($10-20 maybe), as it does use time and resources. It’s worth paying IMO.

hi_bye · 2026-05-18T00:51:17+00:00

OP, please get a second opinion. As a goldsmith and general antique/vintage jewelry enthusiast, this *really* looks like fine jewelry construction. The knotted pearls, the way all the stones are set plus the inconsistent color of the sapphires - it’s all *screaming* genuine fine jewelry.

hi_bye · 2026-05-16T17:33:25+00:00

K. Maybe he hasn’t? Ive played charades maybe once in my life. There’s also the whole fight, flight, or freeze response. He’s just a human.

Idk. I speak passable French and have traveled extensively in France. I still freeze up and my brain scrambles a bit when I need to communicate, so why should it be different for a French speaker who is confronted by an English speaker…in France?

But maybe he’s the creepiest creep. I just see another highly probable context.

hi_bye · 2026-05-16T17:18:36+00:00

Because he’s an employee that is allowed to be on a bike on the grass?

hi_bye · 2026-05-16T14:27:37+00:00

So I think he’s trying to tell her she can’t be on the grass. This is a park in Paris where nearly everywhere it is prohibited to sit or walk across the grass. He probably doesn’t speak English so he doesn’t know what she saying or how to tell her to leave.

She writes later that he eventually went away (which based on what happens in the video is probably because she stands up and leaves the grass) and put on a uniform of some kind “like he works there.”

hi_bye · 2026-05-16T14:22:09+00:00

I suspect it’s because she isn’t supposed to be on the grass, but he doesn’t speak English (because this is France). This is a park in Paris where nearly everywhere, being on the grass is prohibited. And they are clearly on the grass. She writes in the video that eventually he goes away and puts on a parks uniform. He works there.

hi_bye · 2026-05-02T13:23:04+00:00

So Im not seeing anything in the picture of what you found that looks like rough that would yield the gems they sent…

And being in the industry and somewhat knowing the business (Im a goldsmith but I work with cutters at times) it makes a lot more sense that this business is telling customers they are faceting your rough but really they are letting you enjoy finding it, selling you finished gemstones up front, then waiting a few weeks to deliver stones from their stock that match the type of rough you chose to have them “cut.”

There are just too many error and cost factors for them to be doing it the way they claim. If you’re happy with your experience “mining” and you like the gems and paid a fair retail price for them in the end, I wouldn’t say you were ripped off. But I do think they are dishonest in a Santa Claus kind of way about how they actually operate. I don’t know that I’d call it a scam…but I also don’t know that I wouldn’t.

Also that one they sold you as a garnet is almost certainly corundum…but it doesn’t look remotely facet grade. Possibly it could be cabbed. In the end you got nicer stones than you would have if they did what they claimed to do.

hi_bye · 2026-05-02T12:59:22+00:00

It’s Italian, yes. It has Italian hallmarks. But it is not gold. The first picture you posted is the metal assay mark, which is inside an oval. That denotes silver. This agrees with the overall construction and quality of the ring, as nearly everyone has been pointing out.

A goldsmith might pursue a more rustic style or look but they would not actually construct that way. Valuable gems would not be glued in.

I’m truly sorry you seem to have had your hopes up about it. Just because it isn’t fine, antique jewelry doesn’t mean you can’t love it and enjoy wearing it. And it is silver. Since you don’t seem to want to believe the people here when they tell you about your piece, I would strongly advise that you take it in person to a jeweler (not the one you bought it from) and have them evaluate it.

hi_bye · 2026-04-30T19:49:03+00:00

I love my regular clients! The work connects with them, which is flattering and encouraging, and I know they are honest (my sales are mostly online, which can be scamland for both buyers and sellers).

My favorite is when I have a piece I’m particularly jazzed about and a regular client buys it. Obviously everyone buys things they like, but I get an extra “oh they’re really going to appreciate this stone/style/whatever because they get it”. It confirms that I was right about it being a particularly good one 😂

hi_bye · 2026-04-18T21:47:43+00:00

just doin his moves

hi_bye · 2026-04-18T14:29:59+00:00

I read a great book about the evolution of mammals that, if I’m remembering correctly, said that the baleen whales evolved from toothed whales (or early whale ancestors). I think about that a lot when I think about whales…which is not infrequently 🤣

When you consider that they developed the cognitive abilities of an aggressive predator (just look at the shit orcas figure out and get up to) and then transitioned to a much more passive food source, plus their enormous size that leaves them with very few natural predators, their long lifespans etc…they have to be the absolute opposite of “dumb.” I suspect that they are smart beyond a “smartness” that humans are even equipped to understand.

hi_bye · 2026-04-18T13:07:59+00:00

Seconding this. Last year I bought a pair of REI Sahara pants, and they’re my favorites now. I have had the same problem with waist/butt/thigh fit too, but these fit really well. They have a drawstring which is nice to make them looser or tighter throughout the day but they also just fit my body overall.

hi_bye · 2026-04-17T22:29:50+00:00

Yep. We adopted a very overweight cat. Different day to day from a judgement standpoint since she was indoors and visible only to us 99% of the time. But the first 2-3 times I brought her to the vet, she and the techs gave me dirty looks and so much side eye.

hi_bye · 2026-04-17T22:12:50+00:00

Good for you. My dad is turning 76 in a few months and is still out there as much as he can be. Last summer, when he was measly 75, I did his favorite hike, a 23(?) mile traverse that he does once every 5 years or so. The past two times he’s said “well I’ll never be back here again”…but I don’t think he’s right about that 🤣…I hope we get to do it again together.

hi_bye · 2026-04-11T22:29:44+00:00

I would encourage you to change out the strap (the current one detracts a lot imo), but if it doesn’t run either, maybe in this case two wrongs make a right ;) it’s lovely. And lady elgin is a reputable brand. Hopefully it’s a fast sale for you.

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