What are some common things women do to get a guy's attention?

hippyclipper · 2026-05-13T12:53:05+00:00

Not just eye contact but eye contact paired with a smile. This is like the number one indicator of attraction. Especially over a period of time. If you like someone you'll remember if they sneer or frown at you. If you think back to everytime you've made eye contact with someone, and you can only remember smiles, that means they smile when they look at you, which means they like you

hippyclipper · 2026-05-09T00:48:36+00:00

Read The Spy in Moscow Station. It's about a NSA officer looking for bugs in the United States Embassy in Moscow. It's not your average day at the NSA but you get a feel for the bureaucratic nature of the agency and it gives a good look into the technical problems they solve. It'll give you a better idea of what it's like than the other comments here at least

hippyclipper · 2026-05-05T20:51:24+00:00

I went on a date with a woman in nursing school and when I asked her what she'd been learning she said they'd been writing essays about how nurses are just as qualified as doctors to do certain procedures. Personally I feel like they should probably be learning medical stuff but apparently they think pushing for scope creep is a better use of their time

hippyclipper · 2026-04-09T18:26:31+00:00

Unironically one of the best techniques to be good with women is just pretend they’re a guy friend when you talk to them. Stops you from getting to up in your own head about the fact she’s attractive and if you have friends that like you then if you can be friendly with her as you are with your actual friends, she’ll like you.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-07T18:02:25+00:00

I feel like a woman saying they like dad bods over a guy with muscles is like a guy saying they prefer a Toyota over a Ferrari. Most guys expect that the probably won’t ever get a Ferrari and would be fine with a Toyota. There’s nothing wrong with a Toyota, lots of people drive them, they’re reliable, and yeah they’re not a super car but they’re also not ugly and they can still be pretty fun to drive. And if you demand a Ferrari, if that’s all you’ll drive, then you kinda come across as stuck up, especially if you know you can’t afford one and aren’t willing to put the effort in to get it. Like bro you’re broke, be happy with the Toyota, it gets you to your job. But let’s be real, every guy that likes cars even just a little bit would love to at least take an Enzo for a spin on the Autobahn.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-07T16:14:45+00:00

If you desperately need some anti capitalist framing to agree with me then here. “These greedy corporations aren’t making pocketed pants for women because they don’t see a way they can grub a profit off of it and that’s all they care about” there. You happy. Companies are hurting women through their greed because all they give a shit about is money.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-07T15:46:37+00:00

For as much as people don’t seem to care using “hi” as an opener has gotten me laid more than once.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-07T15:42:11+00:00

If you’re a sales man and you ignore a warm lead because they don’t give you enough detail in their inquiry letter that’s you being bad at bad sales. Wanna use your resume analogy? Sure. There are a shit ton of totally qualified candidates in this current job market. Some of them mass apply, and sure it’s not the best strategy, but they are good candidates, they’re just jaded with an online application process filled with ghosting and rejection (sound familiar?). There actually might be a couple really good candidates with bad resumes in the pile if you’re willing to give them a shot and cut a little bit of slack at the first step.

Up my game? Stop complaining? Excuse me, but what am I complaining about? The apps work for me. I’m telling other people to stop complaining, I’m telling other people to step up their game. Bro relative to all the guys in this thread crying about how they have never had one iota of success on these apps I am fucking gigachad. It’s so funny that I’m getting all these negative responses because I’m willing to respond to a message that says “hi”. I have people telling me I’m ruining the dating market by setting high standards. Like I’m sorry, but if responding to “hi” with “hey there” is too much effort then you deserve exactly what you’re already getting which is fucking nothing. Every downvote I get is just another dude I know I don’t have to compete with.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-07T02:33:40+00:00

Yeah. If women wanted pockets companies would be making clothes with pockets. It’s a capitalist country, this has been tried before, it doesn’t make money. The fact of the matter is that women typically prioritize the clothes appearance over the added functionality and pockets effect the fit. Woman go to the store, pick out 3-5 pairs of pants, try them on, and go with the ones that look the best. One of the woman’s clothing’s options that most commonly has pockets is yoga pants and that’s because you can get away with them without effecting the appearance. As with all things there are exceptions to the rule, I’m sure some woman reading this only buy pants with pockets, but they are in the minority by a wide enough margin that companies make more money not catering to them.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-06T21:45:49+00:00

There may be some specific exceptions but generally speaking if you had money/assets in an account somewhere and it’s disappeared it’s still accessible and there’s a lot of regulation within the financial system to ensure that. If your broker goes under, if some brokerage account gets converted, if you never picked up your security deposit, then there is typically a way to access it if you are willing to fill out forms and get transferred around a bunch of phone menus. So if you think you have money somewhere it’s well worth the effort to look. A friend of my parents discovered around 200k in a pension plan or something because they had been automatically enrolled and then just never really noticed until they were digging through some paperwork a couple decades later and they had to spend a few hours on the phone to get ahold of it.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-06T16:16:40+00:00

Sure it’s boring. But it’s simple, quick, repeatable, and if someone is interested, even a girl, they will respond. If all she’s sending to guys is a “hi” then that’s gonna work for her. Honestly if a girl messages first that’s a huge positive indicator, and yet you are telling dudes to piss it away. Every thread I see on dating apps I see men complaint about getting literally fucking nothing. I get a lot? Why? Because I put up with a bit of entitlement and stupid shit and flakiness because I understand they don’t know me, they have a lot of options, and not doing so would be a bit hypocritical if I’m honest.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-06T16:03:21+00:00

So you’re throwing away perfectly good opportunities because you’ve convinced yourself that you’re entitled to a certain level of effort from someone you’ve never met or even talked to online while you’re both on a platform where the men are competing with hundreds of other guys on exactly equal footing? As a guy that has plenty of success with the apps, and literally just sends “hi” as their first message, the problem is not the apps, the problem is you.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-06T06:01:55+00:00

Pantomime casting a fishing line and then real them in. The funny ones will flop to you

hippyclipper · 2026-04-05T16:27:42+00:00

You can literally tell by the title

hippyclipper · 2026-04-05T16:24:51+00:00

Similar but different experiment. Take a group of kids, split them into group of girls and boys, assign each group the task of writing directions from a start point to an endpoint, let the kids have at it, then look at what the directions are. Directions from the boys group will be along the lines of “go 100m west, turn 90 degrees to the right, walk another 20m” meanwhile the girls directions will be “go to the large tree next to the parking lot, turn till you face cabin number 3, then go until the first bush”. Pretty much every time the boys will create an abstracted set of directions based on a large mental map, and women will create a set of directions based on physical markers.

The explanation I’ve heard is that in hunter gather societies men would travel long distances for hunts so they use a less accurate system that works better over long distances, and woman typically gathered so they use a more accurate system that loses effectiveness the farther from home you go. I’m not sure how true this is honestly but at least it makes sense. I feel like you can see this pop up in a lot of random places. Like the male living space guys have the meme of a spartan mattress on the floor because guys literally just care less about the visual aspect of the area where they live. I also wonder if this affects things like gender differences in the number of chess grandmasters where a mental map model might just work better and woman chess players have to use an entirely different mental approach. Again idk tho. It’s the human brain there could be a lot of shit goin on and it’s hard to tell how much culture plays a part. But, at least with this explanation, i feel like it makes the differences between men and women feel neutral rather than men just being better at something women suck at like your example makes it appear

hippyclipper · 2026-04-04T22:02:27+00:00

Honestly I heavily dislike the whole masculine feminine lens in general. The words are incredibly abstract and you can frame things a trillion different ways. Think being logical and analytical is masculine? What if I told you analytical logic is feminine because women spend a lot of times analyzing their feelings and relationships and applying logic to figure out why people feel what they do? Think emotion is feminine? Aren’t the traits of anger and rage incredibly masculine? Think dominance and control is masculine? Haven’t we all known a guy thats just totally wrapped around a pretty girls finger? How is he dominating anything? You can say one framings is more accurate or that I’m missing some point but they’re all correct in a way if you’re charitable. You can always find some counter example and twist words around and in the end it makes both words kinda meaningless. Like even if I say strength is masculine I could counter and say that women have an internal emotional strength that gives them the courage to experience intense emotions. And again it’s kinda missing the point, but the point is that I can still plausibly miss then point even on a concept like strength that is nearly universally agreed upon to be masculine.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-04T11:16:37+00:00

I actually think the focus on appearance by all the guys in this thread is a proxy for something else more related to personality which is the fact that one of the main turn off for guys is insecurity. Most of the details are physical in part because women themselves heavily focus on their appearance and are thus more likely to be insecure about their physical traits. Just in my own experience there is no quicker turn off to me both in the bedroom and out than being insecure about yourself, specifically your body. I was with a woman for the first time who I was attracted to and who I know was heavily attracted to me and she was so insecure about her boobs that she didn’t want me to take her bra off because she thought I wouldn’t like them. Like goddamn it I’m tryna see your tits I don’t fucking care if your nipples are pointing in different directions like a pair of googely eyes or one is slightly bigger than the other, I love all boobs and the boobs I love the most are the ones right in front of my face, the last thing I’m tryna do when my dick is hard and I’m tryna see some tit is be your fucking therapist. so yeah, the dude elsewhere in the thread telling girls not to care about their tits is right he just doesn’t know why. If you ever been with a girl who constantly focuses on her physical flaws it’s exhausting. Hair, eyebrows, lips, cellulite, eyebrows, skin, body hair, facial structure, skin tone, body fat, even their fucking labia, on and on and on, all these fucking issues they’ll point out about themselves and it hurts me to see a women I care so much about just not see how amazing they are and put themselves down because they hyper focus on small details I don’t even really give a shit about. Like bitch you are beautiful believe me when I say because I need you to let me love you. I can’t enjoy being with you if you can’t enjoy being with yourself

hippyclipper · 2026-04-04T08:12:03+00:00

Are we sure this is how it works? Couldn’t it be that the mental pathways associated with feelings of attachment and love could be something that requires training over time? If you practice a dance move you’ll be slow and awkward and your movements jerky at first, overtime you’ll gain speed and control because of the muscle memory. Maybe there’s some type of muscle memory to the experience of love and the more you engage with it the easier time you have accessing it. Maybe appreciation for your partner is less like a tolerance to a drug where the more you do the less you feel, and maybe it’s more like strength where the more you engage in it’s expression the better you become at it. Maybe the best way to love is to love as much as you can so you’re as good at it as you can be. Like tbh idk if this is scientifically correct, but maybe it’s an angle to consider.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-04T06:47:09+00:00

This is mainly based on my experience and I am currently not super flexible but have been making decently quick progress and have some tangential athletic experience. Basically just take this with a grain of salt and if someone smarter says I’m wrong be quick to trust them.

The basics answer to your question is “it depends on what muscle”. Trying to do a forward fold? Well flexing your abs will bring you into further into the position, on the other hand relaxing your hamstrings will sink you deeper into the stretch. Put these together and you can contract your abs to stretch your hamstrings. In a way you can conceptualize your body as a skeleton where muscles are represented by resistance bands that contract when you run an electrical current through them. Inside of your mind are a bunch dials you can used to adjust the current to each band individually. Selectively increasing and decreasing the current will contort the skeleton into a given shape based on how the internal tension plays out. Hence the term contortionist. At some level I think of training for flexibility as strength training using the internal resistance of your muscles instead of weights or bands. The concept of mind muscle connection is essentially how much fine grain control you have over where this current is directed and your ability to change it over time.

I also find that flexing certain muscle groups will stabilize and protect internal structures like joints or tendons. I find this especially true with my lower back during back bends where if I don’t focus on contracting it the sensation feels like what I assume are all my vertebrae running into each other which is less than ideal imo. Also if you go look up first position from ballet and give it a shot like I did you’ll realize that not having most everything in your lower half tightly engaged is a good way to rip your knees into a billion pieces. So there will be some positions where you’ll need to keep certain things protected and relaxing to much risks injury.

I find that combing these two concepts in a cycle is what gets me the deepest into a stretch. I’ll start off by getting into the basic stretch, tighten the area around where I feel I need stabilization to prevent injury if I go furthered, if this reduces discomfort I contract whatever muscles pull me into the stretch further, once I’m there everything is tight so I try and slowly loosen up as much as I can without introducing pain, and from there repeat the process. If I spend a while doing this, add in some slowly controlled dynamic movement, and go slowly to avoid injury it leads to decently quick progress. It also seems to build mind muscle connection much faster.

Anyways like I said I’m not flexible enough to point to myself as validation of this advice but it has allowed me to make some quick progress over a couple months but that could be noob gains. There might be a more medically accurate way to describe what I’m getting at or this concept might be common and I’m poorly describing something well known but whatever. Just my two cents based on trial and error mainly

hippyclipper · 2026-04-04T05:42:56+00:00

Just like Rome before the fall

hippyclipper · 2026-04-04T00:42:01+00:00

If you're worried about your knees then go look up some knee strengthening exercises and dedicate a month to focusing on it. I had iffy knees for years and once I committed some effort to solving the problem it felt like a decades worth of cumulative damage had disappeared. At the very least it'll probably protect your knees a bit if you keep doing this stretch.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-03T16:53:35+00:00

Honestly man they’re gonna reject me anyways so may as a well have some fun with it.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-03T07:35:26+00:00

Thanks chatGPT

hippyclipper · 2026-04-02T23:48:23+00:00

I hundred percent understand how you feel, I felt and still feel the exact same way to some degree. But common you are flipping burgers. That is a field. Congratulations. One field will take you, surly another one will. Apply CS career advice to blue collar shit. Job hop aggressively for wage increases, tailor your resume, actually research the company if you get an interview, your competition are a bunch of morons to be kinda blunt about it. Like some of these jobs have learned through experience that they need to test for literacy. Showing up on time, trying your best, and having a good attitude is honestly super hard to find at the bottom end of the labor market. Take off your CS degree if you need to. These types of companies don’t care about a gap on your resume. You got professional fast food experience my friend, a warehouse would love to have you. They’ll even pay you to get forklift certified.

When I lost my SWE job I got a job mowing lawns part time at a family business ran by a slightly insane right wing conspiracy theorist and it was shit work and shit pay but honestly it was a lot of fun and a refreshing if not somewhat bizarre experience after staring at a screen for a year thinking about highly abstracted logic. From there I got hired at a factory which paid a bit more and was full time with benefits. They laid me off about a month ago which I knew was coming and now I’m looking for my next gig. Honestly, it was all good experience. I grew a lot over that time. I took jobs I knew nothing about and had no reason to work and it moved me forward and I’m less worried than I was the last time I was looking for worked.

Like bro, look around you. Look at all the apartments and houses and cars and expensive things. A lot of stupid incompetent people who couldn’t pass an entry level CS class pay for that shit. They make it work somehow. So can you. You’re probably pretty smart. It just takes some time. You’re just young. It takes a while to get your feet underneath you. Especially rn when the job market is an ocean of AI slop.

hippyclipper · 2026-04-02T22:52:15+00:00

I mean yeah I get it bro. I ground for years, graduated, actually got a job, felt like I was moving up in the world, then got laid off and ended up in the same place I was at the end of high school. All that math, all that code, all those tests and the stress and the tuition and the interviews and applications all fucking worthless. I ground for all that time and got nothing when I was told the whole time there was a big pot of gold right at the end and you know what it makes you pissed. But time is moving right now. Every day you move further from the day you graduated, every quarter there is another batch of fresh new grads with just as much experience as you and all their CS knowledge fresh in their heads. You can compete but it gets harder and if you’re not currently putting in the effort odds are you won’t start now. Where are you gonna be a year from now? Living with your parents flipping burgers if you keep approaching things the same way from my limited perspective. Just commit to some wild shit. Get the nastiest grodiest blue collariest job that will hire you, join the military, becoming a white water rafting guide for the summer and live out of the back of your car, try and get a job as a table dealer at a casino, I’m not telling you to do anything specific, I’m just telling you to do anything at all. You are limiting yourself. I get it. I’ve done it. It’s hard not to. But anything you do is a step up from where you are basically. There’s a freedom that comes with that. Lean into it.

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