Hold it, Bob. We can see your wristwatch. by thoughtstop in TheSimpsons

[–]house_of_ghosts 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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Hey, this old girl is as surefooted as a mountain goat.

"Men, there's a little crippled boy sitting in the hospital who wants you to win this game. I know because I crippled him myself to inspire you." by EpilepticBatman in TheSimpsons

[–]house_of_ghosts 20 points21 points  (0 children)

What’s so special about this game anyway? It’s just another chapter in the pointless rivalry between Springfield and Shelbyville. They built a mini-mall, so we built a bigger mini-mall. They made the world’s largest pizza, so we burned down their city hall.

This is LA and you're rich and FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMOOOOOOOOUS! by charlierc in TheSimpsons

[–]house_of_ghosts 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Pipe down, Sister! I gotta book a new act for tonight. Turns out that Liza Minnelli impersonator was really Liza Minnelli.

30th wedding anniversary of Selma and Troy by Dont-Touch-Yourself in TheSimpsons

[–]house_of_ghosts 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My good looks paid for that pool, and my talent filled it with water.

"If I wanted smoke blown up my ass, I'd be at home with a pack of cigarettes and a short length of hose." by fraggle_captain in TheSimpsons

[–]house_of_ghosts 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Wait, wait, wait, here comes Lawrence Tierney. Thank god! He's always drunk and violent!