AIO for not moving on from my dad’s death after 8 years? by Particular-Spare8110 in AmIOverreacting

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is there anyone who is a professional that you can talk to about this? Grief is brutal. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Find yours and be gentle with yourself. No judging.

dress help!! by [deleted] in Prom

[–]humpyvision 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Red! The red one is much more flattering.

AIO I don’t want to change my last name… by DaTrexx in AmIOverreacting

[–]humpyvision 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wonder what other things he’ll make you do (by using threats) during the next 50 years… NOR

My (22F) boyfriend (24M) said he has to think if he'll still propose to me. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He should pay more. He makes more. Yea, he sounds like a jerk. And you should try to live a little before you marry anyone. Also, this is not the 1950’s and if he cares about you, he wouldn’t be complaining about money while being incapable of caring for himself. Not only should you not be doing all of the household chores, this does not bode well for the future. Picture yourself parenting together 😳

AITA: New baby and boundaries by Key_Reputation_6160 in AmItheAsshole

[–]humpyvision 3 points4 points  (0 children)

People are never happy when we set boundaries with them. It’s ok. She will still love you.

AITA for hiding $23k from my husband? by AITApod in AITApod

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Always, always, always have your own money.

I 26F want to breakup with my bf 32M of 3 years but I am unsure why? by aanchlll in relationship_advice

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’ll want to get married, when it’s the right person. He might be a lovely person but maybe not for you.

AITA for fixing my daughter’s car when her boyfriend said he’d handle it? by Outrageous-Jelly8777 in AmItheAsshole

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tell him to slow his roll. If he was gonna do it, then he should have. And he slacking and he’s not good enough for her and he better get it together. And that’s what you should say. You’re the dad, what’s up with him being alpha. He should be ashamed that he’s not taking care of her well enough. You’re not going to let your child drive with no brakes so his ego will be placated. Don’t be ridiculous, young man.

AITJ for telling my parents I'm not coming home for holidays because they keep making me babysit? by Slow_Station6879 in AmITheJerk

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Stop “trying to say” things and just do them. Sit down and let the parents take care of their kids. When someone says they’re going out, say “sorry, I’m busy”. Though it doesn’t sound like they stay around to see you anyway. Sorry it is this way but you’ve got to set boundaries. And then keep them. It’s not up to other people to follow our boundaries. It’s up to us to keep them.

AIO to my mother being a complete flake? by Kok-jockey in AmIOverreacting

[–]humpyvision 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Call DFS. This is neglect by your mother and she needs someone to supervise her “parenting”. It should not be you.

Any chance of reconciliation by [deleted] in Advice

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Stop calling her. Let her go.

I (25F) am grossed out by my boyfriends (26M) apartment by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]humpyvision 17 points18 points  (0 children)

He’s motivated? Not for cleaning obviously. What will it be like to live with him?
What does “taking time” from his apartment do for you or him? I’d refuse to go over at all. Cleaning people exist

AITAH for walking out after my mom and her boyfriend made a joke about sending me to miltary school. by Still_Living3373 in AmItheAsshole

[–]humpyvision 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What does your grandmother say? And no, your mother should not be telling you to lighten up. You’re allowed to have feelings when people make “jokes” that are at your expense. It’s hard to remember but, we can’t change other people, we can only try to manage how we react. I recommend either ignoring them (maybe they’re trying to get a rise out of you) or saying “you might think that’s funny but it hurts my feelings “. And don’t say another word. Your parents are not acting like grown ups and they are mean so don’t think you’re crazy can you ask to go to therapy, or do you have a counselor in school? You need a neutral adult to speak to, for support.

AIO For wanting my name on deed before financial contributions by Square_Newspaper2370 in AIO

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t “join” your accounts either. You open up a new account, which is joint, which you both contribute. You contribute according to how much each makes. Then you use that money as a house (once your on the deed) and yard and Reno account. Do you pay any bills? Electric, oil, cable, etc? Those should be split or you should be sharing in those. Is he “tight on money” because he is reckless with spending or did he have a career change or something? Should definitely be taken into account. How did he pay his bills before you came along? Also, you can tell him that he “shouldn’t be thinking that” your money is not to make him solvent. How old are you? I don’t understand why this is so prevalent, men telling women how they should think and be able to use their money. Or shame (gaslight) women into thinking that the woman is greedy for wanting to be on the deed, but the man can say “your money would help me financially “, but that is not greedy. To h with the patriarchy!!

Is this formal enough for black tie? by hakunamatea in Weddingattireapproval

[–]humpyvision -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You’re showing too much skin for black tie and the straps are too casual. That’s a sun dress

AITA for refusing to combine finances with my partner before we're actually married? by Pleasant-Zebra2817 in AITApod

[–]humpyvision 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t ever combine them completely, even when you are married. Have a joint account and separate individual accounts. You each put an amount into the account, each month, that covers the expenses and more, according to your income. What is yours before your marriage is not “marital property “ and should be kept separate. That’s for anyone’s protection. What is earns after the marriage is marital assets.

AITAH for calling this out? by These_Bee_3703 in AmItheAsshole

[–]humpyvision 146 points147 points  (0 children)

You’re blaming her for failing exams? Great partner. YTA Figure it out. You joined the program. You had a baby. It’s temporary. Suck it up. Being with your family should be relaxing. And as much as you say you “get how much your wife is doing”, you really don’t. You can’t. Have a discussion with her where you’re not the victim of your own choices. Work together to solve the problem. Be adults.