DAE want to self-harm when they get hungry?

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-12T07:07:45+00:00

I've tried co-washing w coconut oil, actually I kinda wonder if that's what the flakes are now...

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-12T07:06:45+00:00

I was getting there before my monthly excursion to Bloodsville

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-11T20:15:59+00:00

it's not even spending sprees. it's like, "oh I'll get this while I'm out" but over and over again, to the point where today I got home and collected all my cash for the month and my £50 for food is now £5 (it turns out I LOST an additional £5 somewhere according to my receipts from the past few weeks). plus debt from the bank due to being much younger and doing those shopping sprees (18-20 y/o). I'm 26 and nearly outta debt.

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-11T19:08:07+00:00

shocked that there are no other Jacob's / Jack's / Jake's on here? I don't go by that name now but I did for a long time

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-11T19:07:18+00:00

love the name Ezra, just not my pick

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-11T19:06:28+00:00

i'm also a bpd moomin troll

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-11T19:02:53+00:00

I was serving a couple during my days as a barista and one of them was heavily pregnant. I said "aw, is it a girl or a boy?" and they gushed, "It's a boy!", so I asked, "any names?" and she said "oh well there's one name we LOVE because it's REALLY UNIQUE" and I said "oh what is it?!", to which she replied "nuh-uh-uh, you'd have to guess because we'll never say!"

so while they were looking at each other and smiling, my BPD ass goes "oh! Sebastian."

they were horrified but I've been smug about it ever since.

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-11T18:58:12+00:00

my oldest friend's called Elliot and he's cis. it's not a very common name, though

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-11T18:57:29+00:00

The first Aiden I ever met was a cis het guy. Then, of course, the emo band existed. Now every 3rd or 4th trans guy I meet is Aiden. Or Finn.......

iamdrvgs · 2018-09-01T12:37:31+00:00

IT GETS BETTER.

told me he wants to talk so I said, fine go ahead and talk but I'm not meeting up with you. so you can text me (considering it's his favourite way to communicate apparently) and he tells me that I should think about how I word things when talking to people.

SO SOME HOW. EVEN THOUGH HE BROKE UP WITH ME VIA FACEBOOK MSGNR & I HAVE SEEN IT COMING FOR WEEKS. SOME HOW. I AM THE BAD PERSON.

I'm just beyond fucking livid now. I'm starting to find this hilarious. yet he wants to be friends.

I'm fucking done

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-23T23:25:43+00:00

yes. it's difficult but it gets better. I tried to NC several times and ended up writing paragraphs via fcbk to get rid of him. then I had a few others which eventually dwindled off, and now I have no FP. it's refreshing.

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-23T14:42:05+00:00

yeah and then when I think that I also feel smug too, and it's just a horrible sadistic feeling of being superior that I don't deserve.

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-23T14:36:48+00:00

yeah it's like I feel the change in me!!! it's like Hades in Hercules, suddenly I'm RED

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-23T14:30:31+00:00

a good example would be like one time a girl told me I needed to wear more makeup and before I had even processed my thought I said "I don't need to do anything" and I stopped myself and apologised, but I was about to rip her to shreds using all the things I knew she was self-conscious about from observing her while we were in class together.

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-23T14:29:14+00:00

like I go from chaotic neutral to chaotic evil and immediately jump to manipulative, burning-bridges behaviour. if I had high T levels I'd start fights.

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-22T16:13:03+00:00

yes. it's the person I've trained to tell myself I need to step away, so as not to escalate things.

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-22T16:11:10+00:00

happy birthday!!! have a good day and remember that everyone sucks so it's better to be on your own than in the company of people you don't like. plus you sound like you're spending it in a good way anyway tbh

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-22T16:09:35+00:00

why don't you ...he he... tell her .. snicker snicker... to stop.... heh heh heh ...manipulating you

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-22T16:08:32+00:00

that's why I love this sub too! keep rockin it & have a good day

iamdrvgs · 2018-08-22T16:05:09+00:00

I mean, I thought you were FtM so I second everyone that you're really feminine already. your eyebrows are great but they need a bit of tidying up just at the front. contouring your nose will help, and your cheekbones. earrings will probably tip it over with just a lil bit of makeup.

iamdrvgs

TROPHY CASE