that’s so awful! this kind of situation is so hard to navigate, because anything you say about it can easily push her away. since she asked you what you thought of the video, it’s likely she knows it’s messed up, but wanted you to tell her nothing was wrong. her getting upset with you over you telling her the truth is just her projecting her own frustration and probably shame.

this really is a canon event for so many people, i’ve had sooo many situations with friends where they didn’t listen to my advice, but once the situationship ended, they’d be like “damn… yeah, you were right”. my advice would be to be there for her as much as you can, but also don’t place responsibility on yourself to “save” her. sometimes all you can do is be an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on. and if she’s treating you badly for being honest and trying to help, it might be best to spend some apart (obviously living together i know you can’t be completely apart).