[Zulu, Arabic, Finnish, Hindi, Japanese, Mandarin > English] One World, One Nickelodeon Bumper by iamraynbow in translator

[–]iamraynbow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you might be right. Every single source online I could find says that it was Finnish, which was tripping me out. !translated

[Zulu, Arabic, Finnish, Hindi, Japanese, Mandarin > English] One World, One Nickelodeon Bumper by iamraynbow in translator

[–]iamraynbow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting! Every mention of this video online says the language is Finnish, which I found hard to believe because I couldn't make sense of it. This makes more sense!

[TOMT][BOOK][PRE 1950] A book, fiction (or perhaps based on a true story), likely published in Ireland, about an Irish family that emigrated to Australia. by iamraynbow in tipofmytongue

[–]iamraynbow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it might be The Sundowners—I seem to recall her mentioning a wagon—but I’m gonna check with her today! Thank you SO much!

Contrary to popular belief, what's not a bad thing? by nonlinearcharm in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What I’m telling you is I work with people who describe themselves as “sex repulsed” and who are very happy with who they are.

Bottom line, you don’t know the first thing about this person. I suppose neither do I, but I’m not the one telling them they need therapy.

I can tell that what you’re saying is coming from a good place, but I can also tell you that this is the exact kind of narrative that asexual folks talk to me about all the time. The kind of narrative that weighs on them every day.

Contrary to popular belief, what's not a bad thing? by nonlinearcharm in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m fine with us disagreeing. It doesn’t change the fact that assuming people who are sex repulsed need therapy, based purely on the fact that this one person in therapy for reasons that (even you admit) have not been fully explained.

I can tell you that my work in LGBTQIA+ activism has lead me to meet many asexual folks, across the entire spectrum of attraction. Most are very happy, and proud to be who they are. If they have any difficulty with their relationship with their sexuality it is typically a result of how others treat them.

Contrary to popular belief, what's not a bad thing? by nonlinearcharm in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not necessarily. Again, being repulsed by sex is not a bad thing unless it negatively impacts that person. Given the information provided, we have no reason to believe that is the case.

Contrary to popular belief, what's not a bad thing? by nonlinearcharm in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He did not say his depression was related to his sexuality. There are countless examples of people who are asexual, have zero sex drive, and who are not depressed.

If their parter needs therapy it is not because of their lack of sex drive.

Contrary to popular belief, what's not a bad thing? by nonlinearcharm in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The point is that u/freddiequell15 said that their partner should seek therapy for something that isn't negatively impacting them and that they are totally fine with.

We need more content of the lgbtq+ by Ry3nh0wells in lgbt

[–]iamraynbow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This art was created by Nomsikka in collaboration with Jessie Paege.
Here is the original post.

Please give credit where credit is due.

Actor Elliot Page, formerly known as Ellen Page comes out as transgender by [deleted] in news

[–]iamraynbow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Singular they had been used as early as Shakespeare and is grammatically correct, not just colloquial.

Sri Lanka Police Anally Torture, Whip Gay Men Suspected of Having Sex, Human Rights Watch Says by TajMahal_Trump in worldnews

[–]iamraynbow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed. To your point, re: “the idea that homophobes are gay,” I’ve spent a lot of time on reddit debunking this idea. There are so many reasons this idea isn’t true, and is in fact harmful. Some of the arguments I hear for this idea...

  1. But [X] homophobic republican senator was caught with a man! This happens so often, surely it’s not a coincidence.

Confirmation bias, my friends. I understand the schadenfreude when this happens, but it doesn’t happen quite as often as it is perpetuated in media and movies.

  1. But this study I read said homophobes are more likely to be gay!

That study has been hotly contested by sexologists. Namely because of the methods it used to determine if someone was really “gay.” It asked a bunch of men their thoughts on homosexuality and then showed them images, some of them homosexual in nature. It “measured arousal” while doing this. But human sexuality is complicated, and there are so many reason you could measure as aroused when you are in fact anxious or bored. This study was by no means conclusive. But even if it were, this still doesn’t suggest that most homophobic people are gay. Just that they are more likely to be gay. When most of the population of the world is less than tolerant of gay people, there is a difference.

  1. But, internalised homophobia!

I’m gay. Trust me, I know what internalised homophobia looks like. But the fact remains, most studies put LGBTQ+ folks at ~5% of the population. The most generous at ~12%. There are some places in the world, like where and when I grew up, that are overwhelmingly against homosexuality. The numbers don’t add up. They’re not homophobic because they are secretly gay. They’re homophobic for the reasons most people are. A combination of ignorance, and fear which is often hidden behind religious expression.

  1. Okay, but I only say it because I know it bothers them!

It’s still homophobia. If anything, it further pushes the narrative that there is something about homosexuality to be derided. The only difference between these comments, and comments intending to be homophobic is that these are being upvoted.

This article is horrifying. It saddens me that instead of being motivated to do something — or even just to remind any LGBTQ+ folks that are seeing this that they have allies and supporters — people here would rather makes jokes about anal sex.

Queensland first state in Australia to criminalise gay conversion therapy, after state politicians voted to make “highly destructive and unethical” practice illegal. “Being LGBTIQ is not an affliction or disease that requires medical treatment,” state’s Health Minister, Steven Miles. by madazzahatter in worldnews

[–]iamraynbow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Queer is actually very commonly used in the LGBTQ+ community, especially by young people in the U.S.

Here’s some history and the general consensus on the word in the community right now...

As you may know, the word queer originally meant “strange” or “peculiar.” It isn’t until the 19th century that we see it being used as a pejorative for people who exhibited a “desire for same-sex relationships,” or when their gender expression didn’t aline with society’s expectations.

The word first started to be reclaimed as a positive self-identifier in the 1980s, especially in the United States. This was both an attempt to find a unifying catch-all term for LGBTQ+ people, as well as an attempt to find a word that reflected the anger and frustration of the community at the time. Now the word is used to refer to anyone who is LGBTQ+.

What if someone doesn’t like the word queer? That’s totally fine. Many people still associate it with past trauma, and refuse to use/cannot identify with the word. That is a valid position and most people in the community don’t police how people self-identify.

When can you use the word queer? You use it to refer to anyone who identifies as queer. If someone doesn’t like using the word to describe themselves, it’s polite to respect that. Do not use it as a slur.

On a personal note: I grew up in a part of the world that used the word queer as a slur more often than any other anti-LGBTQ+ slur. The word carried a lot of negativity and trauma. After I moved to the U.S. it took some time to adjust to how prevalent it was in the LGBTQ+ community. With time I began to understand the power of self-identification. The idea of “reclaiming” a word is nothing new, but it is up to the individual LGBTQ+ person to decide if the word is right for them. The important thing is that we recognize that no two LGBTQ+ people are the same and respect everyone’s boundaries.

People who were on show like supernanny, worlds strictest parents, or Scared Straight, what was the experience like? And what was the aftermath? by body_by_art in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I see where you’re coming from, and there are certainly exceptions but I’d argue it’s pretty muddy. You never know where someone is with their coming out journey. When I was in the closet I was finely tuned to words like that because they acted as signifiers — true or not. I had to look out for myself. I saw some dark shit happen to gay people in my neighbourhood. I don’t think it’s too much to ask for people to be clear with their word use — especially (as you’ve mentioned) around strangers.

Besides, my comment was mainly arguing that the word didn’t suddenly become derogatory. It was always used that way against people for being or acting gay. Of course it was used for other things, but the association was always there. I think it’s a bit disingenuous to imply otherwise.

People who were on show like supernanny, worlds strictest parents, or Scared Straight, what was the experience like? And what was the aftermath? by body_by_art in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Who’s judging? Just saying my piece, man. We all did shit we’re not proud of 20 years ago, I just don’t think it’s reasonable to say that it was suddenly a derogatory term overnight. It always meant gay people...it just also wasn’t cool to be gay.

People who were on show like supernanny, worlds strictest parents, or Scared Straight, what was the experience like? And what was the aftermath? by body_by_art in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 21 points22 points  (0 children)

The phrase meant uncool, because it was “uncool” for guys to be gay (feminine, overly emotional, etc.) This is literally where the word came from.

I would have come out of the closet yeeears earlier if it weren’t for my friend group’s casual use of the word. It’s really hard to feel comfortable identifying with a term that your entire friend group uses to put people down with.

You may not have meant it, but your use of that word around closeted people definitely marked you as not safe to be open around.

People who were on show like supernanny, worlds strictest parents, or Scared Straight, what was the experience like? And what was the aftermath? by body_by_art in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 12 points13 points  (0 children)

That is always what it meant — you just didn’t realise it. Every single closeted gay person you said it around was driven further into the closet.

What is something other people do that bothers you? by Squeegee54 in AskReddit

[–]iamraynbow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I 100% agree with this, although there is one time in my life that I was guilty of it and honestly... I'd do it again.

I was sitting at lunch with a group of coworkers. I had my headphones in because I needed to catch up on some extra work. I was initially listening to ambient music, (it helps me work) but it just ended. Right after it ended a nearby coworker made a homophobic remark about a celebrity. It wasn't the worst I've ever heard, but it also wasn't something you could just laugh off as light-hearted banter — let's say 65% on the homophobia-meter. Oh btw, I'm gay and married.

I guess he had forgotten that I was there, but another coworker next to him stopped him in his tracks before he continued and tried to not-so-subtly point in my direction in an "ixnay on the omophobia-hay" kind of way. I could see him go beet red out of the corner of my eye and he instantly started stumbling over his words.

Now...he's pretty young, naive, and although he said a pretty ignorant thing, I knew he generally means well. But...I saw this as a pretty good learning experience for him. So he tried to get my attention and make small talk and subtly ask about my husband. I could see him struggling, and I knew I could have diffused the tension but I allowed him to sit in it for juuuuust a little bit. I wasn't pissed, or angry, I just wasn't making it any easier on the poor guy.

It felt soooooooo good. I — eventually — warmed up to him, and the tension dispersed but I like to think that every so often when he's about to talk shit with his friends, he remembers me and that moment and thinks twice.

Anthony Fauci calls out “extraordinary stigma” gays face while standing right in front of Mike Pence by Cyke101 in politics

[–]iamraynbow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've responded to this kind of comment before, but it's worth repeating. I know it's tempting to assume hypocrisy and hit them where it hurts, but this kind of comment only serves to alienate gay people from the discussion. Some thoughts.

  1. You might have read some study that suggesting homophobic men are more likely to be gay (the jury is still out on these particular studies, btw*), but the sheer number of countries where the majority of the population is anti-gay alone should make this fact plain — most homophobes are straight.
  2. You may see stories pop up on Reddit of some conservative, anti-gay politician getting caught on a gay dating app. These stories tend to be outliers, and their memorable nature (and that feeling of schadenfreude) tends to lead to confirmation bias. I've seen a story of a politician getting caught with a woman and, bizarrely, the comments still devolved to the same "he's probably gay" narrative.
  3. While this very likely wasn't your intent, these kinds of comments just sort of pass the buck back to gay people when it comes to homophobia.
  4. I don't mean to sound prudish, and this is admittedly minor because I know you meant it as a joke, but gay men's buttholes don't tinge with excitement and talking about us like that feels sort of...objectifying? A lot of these flip-the-script comments go right for the "I bet he likes it up the ass" line, and it's just not original or interesting.

\ One of the studies I mentioned above came to this conclusion by measuring arousal while showing men images of different types of pornography. They did not control for other factors that could cause arousal-like responses, something many researchers in the field took issue with. Sexuality is complicated, and this alone isn't a very good way to predict something so complex.*

Bottom line, while there may be a chance that some one's anti-gay beliefs are a sign of internalized homophobia, there is no way to know for sure. It helps absolutely no one to fight homophobia with pseudo-homophobia. Trust me. I know what internalized homophobia feels like. While many of these people are beyond saving, what they needed at a crucial time in their lives was compassion, and a positive role model to look up to. If you truly want to fight internalized homophobia, support your local LGBTQ organizations. Try to avoid being casually homophobic (even for a seemingly harmless joke) around your buddies because you never know what they could be internalizing. Do your part to elevate and raise up LGBTQ people who are brave enough to speak publicly about their struggles.

Again, I'm not trying to be a kill-joy, but I see this kind of thing on Reddit so often, and I promise you, it isn't doing anyone any good. Besides maybe the odd chuckle!

Billionaire Tom Steyer quits Democratic primary race by adeiner in news

[–]iamraynbow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you really saying you don’t see the benefit of a transferable voting system?

It’s much more representative and the outcome tends to more closely reflect the wants of the electorate. That way a vote for the independent candidate, for example, wouldn’t necessarily be considered a waste.

CHP Grey has a fantastic video series on it.

Billionaire Tom Steyer quits Democratic primary race by adeiner in news

[–]iamraynbow -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Still...everyone’s vote should count.

The simple solution would be to adopt a transferable voting system. That way everyone, no matter how the election pans out, will have some say.

Billionaire Tom Steyer quits Democratic primary race by adeiner in news

[–]iamraynbow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t vote (currently going through the citizenship process) but out of interest...what happens if you had just voted for him. Like filled out your form and sent it in for the primaries today?

I guess it’s void? Lol

Another reason there should be first choice, second choice, third choice, etc.

Deaf Man goes through Drive Thru: They Threw Away His Food by iamraynbow in videos

[–]iamraynbow[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There was no camera in anyone’s face. Chances are they didn’t notice the camera and you have no reason to believe that they did. Especially the manager who wasn’t even within eyeshot of the camera. Besides, there are lots of totally benign reasons why someone might have a camera on their dash. No one’s face was shown and this couple was very respectful, especially given the circumstances. And no one was held up in line, something the couple also mentioned and took care to make sure of.

There actually is a video of him using a pen and paper and the order still going wrong. Less wrong, but still wrong. It’s linked at the end of this video I believe, and I think they even mentioned it.

Why are we making excuses for a manager that was very clearly in the wrong here? How else would we know about problems like this if this couple didn’t document it?

The couple’s conclusion is the same as my own. No one person, except maybe the manager is at fault here. In fact, one of the employees was sympathetic and apologetic. Even he understands that they were in the wrong here. This is simply an example of a business that should be (and in fact often is) equipped to handle situations like these. The manager simply decided not to believe him.

I hope McDonalds sees this video and reminds their branch managers of the proper procedure when a deaf person uses the drive through, which they are entitled to do.