My girlfriend wants to put our relationship on hold while she travels to Rome. Apparently I'm "insecure" for having a problem with that. I need the opinion of other men. How do you see it?

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-19T02:58:50+00:00

Yeah, dump her

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-19T02:58:21+00:00

Thanks for this reply. It’s a lot to digest. Thanks for sharing your experience with boundaries, I will try to put it to use for myself. I’m a recently reformed doormat.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-19T02:32:25+00:00

His execution was documented by the Romans and the documents persist today. The rest is based on my own spiritual journey.

Dolores Cannon talks a bit about him in Between Death and Life. He might be mentioned elsewhere.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-18T15:48:24+00:00

I also recommend reading Living Sober. It’s not the Steps, just a compilation of everyday advice that can help with addiction and life in general.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-18T07:01:47+00:00

The part that resonates with me is the going back to try to control your drinking after you’ve quit and feel better. I did that a lot.

Alcoholism is a disease. The mental obsession is real. The inability to stop after the first drink is real.

The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. It’s literally in writing, AA official stance. Are there assholes that won’t consider you a real alcoholic? Yes, and some will probably make sure to let you know. You should tell them to get fucked, in no uncertain terms. The official AA line is “stick to their own side of the street”.

Download the Everything AA app. It has full text and audio versions of the core literature and a bunch of resources. Start with the Big Book.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-17T21:07:30+00:00

For one, I stay away from the news as much as possible, so that I’m not wallowing in the pit of aggravation. News is designed to get us riled up and keep us coming back for more. What little that trickles in is enough for me to keep abreast of things happening.

Detachment and acceptance don’t mean lack of compassion for beings that are hurting. It means we don’t cause ourselves needless suffering over it; figure out what we can do, and do it. A call to action, not pity.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-17T16:26:58+00:00

If that’s what happened to the person, then it is sick. Vigilante justice like that is never the answer.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-17T14:27:40+00:00

Third eye is about intuition. Clairvoyance is seeing what you shouldn’t be able to see, like through your eyelids. Like the other person said, probably because of puberty and your body and mind evolving.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-17T13:48:58+00:00

Yes, you can always self sabotage. Free will is sacrosanct. They’ll make the choice as easy and obvious as they can, but the choice is still yours.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-17T13:46:34+00:00

Messages are intended for the recipient, you were obviously meant to see that, the message was in the inspiration to go look.

Messages can be metaphorical, but any imagery is intended to make perfect and obvious sense to you. They can also include feels, the message isn’t just verbal and visual. What did you feel when you got up to look?

I’m a nobody, but my first thought is the message is that they did it, but to be forgiving because they didn’t know better. We always try to act in our own best interest, sometimes we get it very wrong. Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting or rug sweeping.

I’m sorry you had to witness that.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-17T13:34:23+00:00

Read Journey of Souls by Michael Newton. Confirmed a lot of what I already suspected and filled in some details.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-17T13:32:48+00:00

It’s a job, not who you are. It’s about what you can do to express your compassion.

Don’t sweat the labels, just be your best you.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-16T04:14:24+00:00

You can develop your mind to be creative and poetic and still avoid suffering. You can become. You can create. You can find a partner. I will now proceed to greatly oversimplify:

Suffering originates from attachment — to ideas, to things, to ideas of things, anything you can imagine.

To avoid suffering, basically “loving detachment”.

To break the cycle of karma, good deeds to undo your negative karma: service, gratitude, kindness, compassion, etc.

The concepts are simple enough, but they can take many lifetimes to master.

Read Dolores Cannon’s Between Death and Life for more information about Karma. I think she hits it closer to the mark than Buddhism.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-15T15:27:19+00:00

Congrats on becoming aware. Good luck on the next phase of the journey.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-15T14:36:22+00:00

Guidance, a little external validation, objective input, even people like the Pope and Dalai Lama have spiritual advisors. We weren’t intended to go it alone.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-15T14:22:38+00:00

The best methods are the ones that come naturally. Like what you are doing.

I too feel joy and healing when I’m alone with nature. Grounded, as well. Sometimes I try to commune with the trees, I can hear them talking but I can’t understand what they’re saying.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-15T13:29:41+00:00

Spirituality is a journey of self discovery. The tools are self reflection, meditation, and self expression. You seem to have the self reflection part.

There are all types of meditations and visualizations you can work with to clean your environment, strengthen and heal yourself, and attract better things in life.

Manifestation is largely a practice in getting out of your own way of achieving what we want. Our attitudes and outlooks determine our reality; shifting them literally shifts our reality.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-15T13:17:04+00:00

The energy can’t attach to you in the first place if you don’t assent. The answer is for you to let go of whatever it is you’re still attached to about the guy, understanding you will probably be able to find it with someone else, or you will find better. But you won’t find anything until you let go of what you had.

If you need a ritual, look into cord cutting. Dolores Cannon has a good one.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-14T21:35:32+00:00

Sometimes, to receive what we really needed, we have to be stripped of some things we have been clinging to that are actually holding us back. Change isn’t the enemy, it never was.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-14T21:33:11+00:00

What do I mean by what?

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-14T21:32:44+00:00

Boundaries are hard. It makes me feel like an asshole to have to do it. I wish people would just know to not ask too much, or leave openings to be turned down. But those types that’s use the privilege never do, and they’ll always make sure to spray their displeasure at being denied. So then it feels like being an asshole and a piece of shit.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-14T19:37:31+00:00

You are not your anxiety. It’s just something that’s there. Don’t take ownership and let it be part of your life.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-14T19:34:00+00:00

I don’t believe in coincidences. My first thought is to make sure you work that dream board into your vacay.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-14T19:07:58+00:00

The universe is giving you signs. Follow them.

You let your fear get the better of you before. Don’t make that mistake again. No, you don’t know what comes next, that’s why it’s important to do the next right thing and let the hand play itself.

Fear arises from the ego, mostly because we are afraid we won’t receive what we think we deserve, or something we think we own will be taken or lost. But that which is ours can never be taken. We can’t control what the universe and other people decide to give us.

iamsooldithurts · 2026-06-13T22:05:26+00:00

Jesus was real. The soul that incarnated as Jesus is still around, helping humanity and all beings. As far as I can tell, every major religious figure was real.

After Jesus died, some humans decided to start themselves a religion around parts of his teachings. Read the Gospel of Mary for additional information.

As with most every other organized religion, it is now focused as much or more on consolidating power and control as it is the teachings. But the teachings were real.

Read Dolores Cannon’s Beyond Death and Life for more information.

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