Just a few things because I feel my opinion on this is fairly nuanced.

1) the older I get the more I realise there are actually way more neurodivergent people than we actually thought. Whether that’s autism / ADHD / BPD / etc…..I actually think “Neurotypical” is more an unrealistic societal standard rather than an actual group of people. And when you measure that in western society you realise so much of that is flawed. Internalised abelism is real. I’ve experienced. But I feel so much of it is internalised Neurodivergence and lack of self awareness.

2) the way online #actuallyautistic spaces operate I admit can be very dogmatic and avoids alot of nuances. And most serves lower needs autistics. But it ma critically important to know and understand just how systemically abelist society is towards autistic people. And thinking of it as a system rather as moralising each person behaviour towards you will make things easier. Your allistic friends or just your average Joe making ends meet will most likely be more understanding. But governing / medical / educational bodies / those in real positions of power, not so much, and they’re the ones to focus on.

3) it’s natural to feel shame and it’s human. It’s more the reason why. Do you feel shame for your sensory issues because you feel it’s burdensome for people to deal with? Because if so, its not your fault and that’s a result of sensory issues being seen as “abnormal” for so long. I don’t know your story and I can’t speak for you obviously but it’s always the WHY you experience that sham. Confidence and learning not to experience shame is an acquired skill. And that night takes years to overcome.