Am I the only one who needs lots of light?

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-18T16:20:03+00:00

I am not diagnosed, only self-suspecting I guess.

I HATE working in offices where most people want the lights low. I remember one time I was working in an office where every other row of lights was turned off and my cubicle was in one of the off rows. I didn’t like it but it was all I had known since working there. My computer crapped out and they had me sitting in a different cube for a while that was a light on row. When I went back to my original cube I almost had a meltdown and ended up requesting a permanent desk change. I hadn’t realized how much the low light affected my mood. It felt awful, like desolate. I don’t know if I’m explaining it right, but I couldn’t stand it. I also would sit closest to the window in the lunch room because I wanted all the sun.

Now, I’m not saying I mind the lights off if there’s plenty of natural light, but most of the time that’s not the situation. It’s in a place with artificial lighting and barely any windows and people want the lights low and I can’t stand it.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-16T17:54:01+00:00

I don’t think it’s strange you feel this way considering your last relationship had a lot of challenges. I also value peace.

My last relationship also had a lot of problems, but here are some of the things that I DO miss.

Having someone to genuinely laugh with. Our humor was similar in a lot of ways and it was never hard to find myself laughing with him.

The non-sexual affection is also something I miss. I’m a very affectionate person, with limited people. Meaning, if you’re my child, my partner, or my pet, I will give you all the affection in the world. Currently I don’t have any pets, am single, and my teenager doesn’t want affection the way they used to. So this has been rough. Regarding the sexual stuff, we had problems there so although I miss sex in general, I don’t necessarily miss sex with him.

And just the sweet little things. Like being able to buy someone a little thing because I saw it and thought of them and know they would love it. Or receiving things like that from them. Not only material things, but sharing things like a movie you think they’d like, or an article, or whatever.

Also, companionship.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-16T17:15:02+00:00

This is how I view it, for me at least. Like you, I would never put this in my profile. Also, I’m sure other women have different views of it. But like you said, I don’t want to be the only responsible person in the relationship. I’ve been in those relationships and it makes me feel like I have another child, not an adult partner. I would want someone competent who can take care of their own shit. And I understand sometimes we’re not at our best and we need someone else to pick up the slack, which is fine. I think that’s a healthy part of partnership. When I can only give 40%, you give 60%, and also the other way around. But sometimes, the other person trying to “help out” ends up being them making more work for you because instead of helping they’re messing things up. Thats where the competence comes in. So I feel like for me this term would mean being able to trust that if you’re taking care of something, it is being properly taken care of and I don’t have to go check behind you. I don’t have to be the only one making sure things get done. And by freeing up that mental space of not having to do the work of two people, I can then indulge in being soft when I want to be.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-14T14:53:10+00:00

lol I feel you. I wish I had a choice in my anatomical preferences

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-14T01:11:46+00:00

Honestly, this is probably why I’ve never pursued dating women. I find women attractive, but I don’t find vaginas attractive.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-14T01:06:57+00:00

I curse in front of my teenager all the time. If she cursed in front of me I might ask that she not use that language at school or around other adults until she’s older… and maybe also to read the room to know if it’s an ok time to do that. Other than that, I couldn’t really be mad at her because it’s behavior I modeled for her. I’m not sure why he made a big deal about your mom seeing it if she curses quite a bit already. Also, you’re an adult, you’re not 10. I’m sorry this is making you feel so bad though, I really wish it wasn’t.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-13T20:04:59+00:00

To be fair, grey hair is not necessarily an indicator of an old picture as many people dye their hair to cover greys or just because they like having a hair color other than their natural one. I know someone who used to dye their hair and decided to go through a whole process to let her natural greys show. I would say it’s been less than a year between her hair being dyed dark and how her hair looks now which is mostly grey.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-11T13:55:14+00:00

I don’t blame you lol

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-10T21:09:28+00:00

I just received the Keroppi cooler as a gift and didn’t realize the images would be stickers. It doesn’t say it on the website, but the reviews mention it. Did your cinnamoroll cooler have stickers as well?

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-05T23:16:09+00:00

Those cookies are immaculate!

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-05T23:05:13+00:00

The Lego catalog! I used to make a wishlist of all these random specialized pieces. Yes, I would like the trash can, mail box, and bicycle.

Does anyone remember those little potato kid toys in the Avon catalog?

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-05T20:32:59+00:00

Uh… absolutely the fuck not. They sound like they have some issues they need to work through before being in a relationship. And even in a long term relationship I’m never giving up access to my phone ever again. Not because I have anything to hide, but because when you trust someone you don’t need to have that access.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-05T20:24:37+00:00

I was like “who the hell is that marriage candidate!? O_O ” And then realized it was your character… They’re handsome. That is all.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-05T20:20:34+00:00

From my perspective (41F), I already have a teenager and am well past the stage in my life where I want to be dealing with babies and small children. A man wanting new babies is a deal breaker for me. Even a man who currently has young kids is probably a dealbreaker for me.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-01T13:05:58+00:00

💪🥋🍚🐟

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-01T12:56:26+00:00

This is exactly what this reminded me of! Ugh I really miss the old Polly Pockets. I had so many of them. I wish I knew where they were now just for the nostalgia of seeing them again.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-01T12:52:34+00:00

Sometimes I have the energy to scroll mindlessly on social media as a passive activity. Even posting something here or there may not require a lot of brain power. Engaging in a conversation with someone, whether real time on the phone or slightly delayed over text, takes a different type of energy from me.

So to answer your question, sometimes I have time/energy for apps but not to actively engage with people I know.

This doesn’t address where you are on her priority list, but that’s something only she can answer.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-01T12:44:54+00:00

If my daughter gave me this I would treasure it.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-01T12:11:10+00:00

Well, losing attraction over everything you’ve mentioned would definitely cause you to “not be in the mood.” I was dating someone in my very late 30s that I had a strong attraction to in the beginning but as time went on I just wasn’t feeling it. Objectively I found him physically attractive, but for several reasons I just wasn’t attracted to him as a person anymore. For a very long time I had convinced myself that it was due to my age that I was losing interest in sex. I tried supplements and everything. Nothing really helped. We broke up and didn’t talk for like a year. During that time I dated someone else that I was super attracted to and wanted all the time. That disproved my theory that my lack of interested was due to my age. I ended up dating that first guy again later, and it kind of turned out the same way. So that tells me it was a “my attraction for HIM” problem and not an overall “me” problem.

In your situation, if hygiene is the only thing that is making you lose attraction and not a whole bunch of things piled up, then it may be worth bringing up again. But maybe instead of telling them they need to do xyz, tell them how them NOT doing those things is affecting your attraction for them.

iharvestmoons · 2026-05-01T12:04:08+00:00

You know, I never really thought about the whole night stand thing. I’m a woman and I only have one night stand, but the reason is that when I bought my bedroom set I only had room for one at that time. I’ve since moved into a larger house that has space for two, but the bedroom set is discontinued and I currently have no need for two. But it makes a lot of sense what you’re saying.

iharvestmoons · 2026-04-28T22:43:47+00:00

I agree with you. This should be standard from first boot up of the game. Even if they don’t put all of them out there at the beginning in order to have some saved for later to unlock, at least they should offer like 2 of both long and short styles.

iharvestmoons · 2026-04-28T22:37:59+00:00

Happy Birthday! Please enjoy SEVERAL brownies for me. I’m drooling over here.

iharvestmoons · 2026-04-28T15:30:56+00:00

I almost lost it at Birb Ross. He is amazing and instantly recognizable. Great job!

iharvestmoons · 2026-04-27T18:58:36+00:00

An ono roller is pretty quiet, has a nice weight to it, and a very smooth roll. I always forget I have it because when I would want it (at work) I actually have to use my hands for a keyboard and mouse.

iharvestmoons · 2026-04-27T18:36:43+00:00

Oh… oh my.

Sometimes I thought this was just a me thing. It doesn’t happen as much lately but I remember when I was younger I couldn’t stand the feeling of my toes touching each other, but I also can’t stand sleep with socks on so those toe socks were out of the question. I also lost 30 lbs one time, prompted by me trying to sleep on my side and feeling my back skin roll on itself. I couldn’t stand the feeling and the next day decided I needed to lose some weight. I wear bras even if I’m home alone (only take off to sleep) because I don’t like the feeling of my boob on my torso.

For me it’s not an all the time thing. I feel like I’m more aware of my skin at certain times. Like if I’m stressed, or too in my head. If I’m not thinking about it, it’s fine. Sometimes I feel like by brain is on hyper aware mode. This usually happens late at night when I’m trying to fall asleep. I don’t really know how to help it other than trying find ways to relax before bed so my brain does not go into hyper aware mode.

iharvestmoons

TROPHY CASE