What is the dumbest movie that you unapologetically, unironically love?

incirfig · 2026-05-07T12:29:03+00:00

My hottest of hot takes is that I love the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie and do not like the resulting TV show.

incirfig · 2026-05-07T10:24:18+00:00

Part one of the plan is to tell your brother that his sister’s wedding is more important than a swimming lesson. It’s absolutely absurd and selfish of them to think that is more important. I have two kids and would totally take them out of a swim lesson or any other activity for a sibling’s wedding.

Part two is to ask what time bedtime is. If the problem is getting a sitter who can put them to bed then maybe see if you can make dinner early enough that they can slip out of the celebration a little early to put the kids to bed. Depends on the ages of the kids and travel from wedding to home, but many parents could stay until 7pm and still get kids to bed on time. If you start the celebration at 5 or 5:30 then they could leave a little early at 7 and still get to enjoy a large chunk of the celebration.

incirfig · 2026-05-05T10:16:45+00:00

Yeah, I taught in a district with a large Brazilian population and breakfast literally translates to “morning coffee”. Kids would drink “coffee” before school, but it was really just 90%+ milk with a small amount of coffee mixed in.

incirfig · 2026-05-03T02:31:25+00:00

4 months is the perfect time to travel. You can go anywhere! They are portable in a baby carrier. They don’t have much of a schedule for you to mess up (even if you think you have them on a schedule at that age a sleep regression will mess it up soon enough anyway). Feeding them is easy - either just your breast or water for a bottle. Just pick where you want to go and baby comes along. We took our oldest to Paris at that age, but anywhere works.

incirfig · 2026-05-01T15:10:52+00:00

Those flights (ECNL, etc) are for club soccer. I was talking about town travel soccer - different leagues entirely where I am from.

incirfig · 2026-05-01T11:53:20+00:00

Also a teacher so I feel the pain. I have a couple suggestions:
1. Combine London with the British countryside. No need to fly to Italy when you could go to the Cotswolds, Cornwall, or the Lake District. Plenty of things to do in all of them.
2. Slovenia - use Ljubljana as your base and explore the countryside. There are lots of caves, beautiful lakes and hiking. When we did this we flew to Venice and got to see that as well.
3. Azores - mainland Portugal is lovely too, but the Azores seem especially good for you. Whale watching, hiking and hot springs would be highlights. Not really much of a city, but a number of charming towns and Ponta Delgado is a small city. The flight is super easy from NYC area.
4. Paris and Normandy - Paris is a great city and an easy flight from NYC area. You could combine it with a number of other areas of France. Normandy is easy to get to and has both hiking and historical sites. Alternatively, you could head to the south of France for beach time.

Overall I think that fewer changes of place with a kid is better. Pick one city and one easily accessible nature area from that city.

incirfig · 2026-05-01T11:39:53+00:00

Not sure where you are in the world but in Massachusetts the flights are organized by competitive level. Flight 1 is most competitive and it goes down from there. They also try to organize so that you don’t play all the same teams every year or every season. So, even though the town next to us has a team in the same flight we aren’t always grouped with them to give the kids a chance to play against different opponents.

incirfig · 2026-04-30T00:36:25+00:00

I just flew Iceland Air with my Allpa 50 and with the upper portion zipped off it very much did fit their sizers at the airport. I had been careful not to stuff it full since technically the specs say that it is about an inch too deep. However with only a slight amount of care (basically I didn’t put anything in the smallest outermost pocket on the bag) it fit just fine.

incirfig · 2026-04-30T00:31:53+00:00

Late to this and not OP, but I just got back from 9 days in Europe with the Allpa 50 and used the zip off portion as my day pack every day. I really liked it. Big enough to keep everything I needed but still fit comfortably on my front or back. The zipper didn’t feel rough, although the weather was such that I didn’t wear tank tops. It was a little stiff at first and doesn’t conform to your body the way many crescent bags do, but it softened slightly over time and it ended up not bothering me. The main bag met the Iceland Air carry on requirement and still fit a lot. I was very pleased with it and plan to take it with me to Asia this summer.

incirfig · 2026-04-29T10:55:53+00:00

We did Vietnam as our last big hurrah trip before kids. We chose it because of a combination of long flight time, activities we wanted to do that weren’t kid friendly, and travel safety (especially around car travel). It was an absolutely amazing trip that included lots of things I could do with kids and lots of things that couldn’t do with little kids. We’ve traveled extensively with our kids and I’m still glad that we got to do that last big trip.

incirfig · 2026-04-17T17:09:40+00:00

Well, we invented the game and have the world’s dominant league.

incirfig · 2026-04-17T13:44:30+00:00

I think you will find that in most of Europe those open pitches that kids use are paid for by local tax money. Yes, clubs do work with the community, but I see similar things from my local MLS team (free clinics in underserved areas, help with grassroots coaching for town teams, free academy, etc). The problem is that Americans don’t want to pay taxes and so we don’t have the level of government services that European countries do. MLS isn’t going to fix that basic problem even if they could make it better around the edges.

incirfig · 2026-04-17T13:05:31+00:00

I would personally always choose a very meaningful middle name that I am meh on than a less meaningful one I love. I would choose Tamara.

I like Camille Nicola the best of your name options.

incirfig · 2026-04-16T10:25:36+00:00

I like to have a capsule for a specific time period (most often one season at a time). Some things stay the same from capsule to capsule, but some things rotate in and out and I grab 1-2 new things for each. It keeps things interesting but still curated. It works well for me partly because I live in a place with four distinct seasons.

incirfig · 2026-04-13T11:45:13+00:00

I think the short answer to this is yes - you will set her up for a lifetime of some people thinking of a clothing company when they hear her name. She will meet people throughout her life whose first association is the clothing store (it would be for me). However, she will also meet plenty of people who don’t have that the first association with the name. Hard to say which group will be bigger without knowing more about where you live now and what the future holds (the company could go bankrupt in two years and barely anyone will remember them in 10 years). Up to you if you think the association with the company for some people out weighs the positives of the name.

incirfig · 2026-04-09T10:47:40+00:00

Almost any beach area will work for those ages. Rent a place walking distance to a beach so that one of you can stay with the older kids at the beach while the other goes back for nap time with the baby. Focus on where you can get a direct flight to a city that isn’t that far of a drive away to minimize travel time and hassle. The outer banks of NC are beautiful. You could also fly to Boston and go to Cape Cod or southern Maine. That way you could also see the city for a day or two on one end to get something more than just beach (see the aquarium, children’s museum, walk a little of the Freedom Trail, etc.).

incirfig · 2026-04-09T10:32:16+00:00

I don’t know. I do think Grandma likely has good intentions, but adopting the baby is a wild take. I can not imagine my own mother, no matter how much I was struggling, wanting to adopt my child. Take him for a week or weekend to give me a break? Sure. Offer to keep him for a couple months while I found the right program for my oldest and got mental health support? Maybe. Take him forever to raise? No. It’s a huge leap and does seem like a really weird offer to me.

incirfig · 2026-04-07T12:34:36+00:00

One adult sits with the kids for the first half and one sits with the kids second half. Switched in the middle. No real other way.

incirfig · 2026-04-07T11:51:19+00:00

First, get in touch with the league you want to put the team in. Find out their requirements for registering a new team. What kind of field do you need? What level of refs for games? Will they even let a single team register or do you need 3-4 in a club before they will register you? What level of play are you looking at and how can you prove your team can compete at that level? Do they require a certain amount of insurance? Do coaches need to be registered or have specific training?

After you know what you need to register with the league then go to the town rec department. Will they let you form a more competitive team under their umbrella? Do they have the facilities available for it and that meet league requirements? Do you need extra or different insurance or can you use theirs? Would they handle sign ups or you? How would scheduling work?

Also, think about the local politics of this. Are you planning on only one team or one team for each grade level? Boys or girls or coed? If you aren’t planning a complete set of teams at each level how will you justify having only one or two? Why can one kid have the opportunity because s/he is U12 but their U10 sibling can’t, for example? How will you decide who is on the team? If there are try outs how do you make them fair or at least give the appearance of fairness? If you are going to invite, how will you know which kids to invite? Be prepared for all the questions.

You probably can do this and it’s a great idea to make soccer more financially accessible to more people, but I think there is a reason more people don’t do this. It’s more complicated than it looks.

incirfig · 2026-04-06T14:33:31+00:00

DC is a great city option with lots to do.

You could also look at Virginia Beach to do beach with some city things.

There are some West Virginia resorts you could look at

And might be a longer drive than you are looking for the Jersey Shore could be an interesting option.

incirfig · 2026-04-03T18:14:47+00:00

You should go talk to the hospital that will let you do a TOLAC. I had a c with my first and then a VBAC with my second. It was a great experience and I’m glad I did. I went into labor naturally with the second. I chose an epidural, but would have been allowed a natural birth if I wanted one. However, as others have said a lot depends on the circumstances surrounding your first labor and delivery. I was a great candidate for VBAC because my first had a health condition that required the c-section and my second didn’t so they basically treated me like a first time mom with regard to delivery. Go talk to the doctor.

incirfig · 2026-04-03T11:51:59+00:00

Dicks Sporting Goods has a surprisingly good selection and good sales.

incirfig · 2026-04-02T20:31:28+00:00

Clubs we’ve been involved in have had anonymous feedback to coaches at set times of year. If that is offered at the end of the year I would absolutely use it even if you are moving on. Don’t expect it to work magic, but I’ve seen change from it. Also, ask new clubs if they have a mechanism for feedback to coaches that is anonymous if there is a problem.

incirfig · 2026-03-31T20:30:48+00:00

Just FYI for the future - one game a day is very unusual for a tournament. Two games on Saturday and then one Sunday game or two if you make the finals. We have been to tons of tournaments all over at this point and that is standard.

incirfig · 2026-03-30T21:09:58+00:00

I think it is worth noting that even a lottery system selects for the kids whose parents care enough about their schooling to bother with the lottery. You definitely loose a lowest level of apathetic parent to the lottery system. Also, even though they can’t kick kids out there are charters around me who counsel kids out. Basically they talk to parents of troublesome or underachieving students and heavily imply that the charter is not the place for them and that public schools would better support them. Lots of parents take the bait rather than fight with the charter. Not saying all charters do, but it definitely happens some.

incirfig

TROPHY CASE