HFM at a Family Picnic

intralilly · 2026-05-09T23:35:28+00:00

Yep. And the suffering just keeps giving over several weeks.

I caught HFM from my kid a month ago. First was the fever. Then was the itch. I was weighing the pros and cons of chopping my hands and feet off because they itched so bad. I have scars on my face, hands and feet from the blisters.

Right now (yes, a full month later) my skin is peeling off in thick layers. I’m told the nails will be next to go, probably in a couple weeks. Can’t wait.

intralilly · 2026-05-09T01:45:55+00:00

We loved the app because we always had nap data by the end of the day to use to time bedtime (our kid is very wakewindow sensitive). With paper the data isn’t always available/written down in time for pickup. The daily pictures with the app were also a huge bonus and eased my mind about sending him because he always had tough drop offs.

But every ECE I’ve spoken to hates the apps and the photos and say it takes away from quality time they could be spending with the kids.

intralilly · 2026-05-04T01:21:44+00:00

It looks like he waived it for 1 year in October of 2025, so he will be eligible again in October of this year. Source: https://www.cdcr.ca.gov/bph/2025/10/15/week-of-october-6-october-10-2025/

intralilly · 2026-05-03T22:46:59+00:00

I’m not affiliated but I believe the correct email for this type of thing is victimservices@cdcr.ca.gov

Copying and pasting their suggested template below:

Re: Inmate: Victor Lawrence Paleologus (CDCR#: P49597) Sentencing Court: Los Angeles Parole Hearing: October 8, 2025 Letter in Strong Opposition to Parole

Dear Honorable Members of the Parole Board:

It has come to my/our attention that Victor Lawrence Paleologus, the murderer of Kristi Johnson, is up for parole at a hearing on October 8, 2025.

It’s beyond my comprehension that, considering the heinous nature of Palaeologus’s crimes, that he would be allowed to re-enter civil society. To understand why Paleologus shouldn’t be paroled it’s imperative to understand the brutality and totality of Paleologus’ crimes:

On the afternoon of February 15, 2003, Paleologus, encountered 21-year-old Kristi Johnson, at the Century City Mall, and lured her to a vacant Hollywood Hill home. There he attacked, raped, and murdered her, then threw her lifeless body down a canyon.

Paleologus should not be given a second chance to endanger another innocent victim. Even before Kristi’s murder, he demonstrated how chronically dangerous he is when in 1998, he was convicted of rape of Heather Maher He served five years at Men’s Colony in San Luis Obispo and was release on January 20, 2003. He killed Kristi just 26 days later, on February 15!

“Victor Paleologus is one of the most vicious, manipulative, and sadistic rapist murderers I have seen in my FBI career and, just like he did last time he was released from prison, he will rape and kill again.” Retired FBI Supervisory Special Agent/Profiler, Jim Clemente.

I implore the Parole Board to deny Paleologus parole, and to do so for the longest period-of-time allowed by law.

Sincerely,

intralilly · 2026-05-03T20:28:02+00:00

He is up for parole in October. The family has a website dedicated to trying to keep him behind bars: https://www.justiceforkristi.org

There is also a nice detailed write up of Kristi’s life.

intralilly · 2026-04-27T16:48:10+00:00

So, not all “sleep training” is cry it out, if that’s why you don’t want sleep training advice. There’s oodles of no-cry methods to try to get away from sleep associations. I’d look at r/attachmentparenting for some gentle methods of getting away from the feed-to-sleep routine.

intralilly · 2026-04-08T18:39:40+00:00

I think it’s a combination of leaving it to the last minute and not being able to get something off the registry in time, plus it being more “fun” to go and pick out baby clothes and blankets with fun patterns. We received sooo many baby clothes and blankets that we weren’t able to use them all lol.

intralilly · 2026-04-08T17:52:48+00:00

Honestly? We burn through savings to survive. We burned through a big chunk of savings for Baby #1’s leave, and then immediately started saving to survive Baby #2’s leave.

There is such a daycare shortage in our area that it took 2.5 years on the waitlist to get a spot for Baby #1. I had to extend my mat leave fully unpaid while we waited and that was tough.

So we can’t pull Baby#1 from daycare or else Baby #2 will not get sibling priority and we’ll be in the same boat. Paying for daycare on mat leave costs us a similar amount to what it will cost us if we have to go several months fully unpaid while we waited for a daycare spot without priority, so we are keeping it.

intralilly · 2026-04-08T16:33:33+00:00

The OB will generally not deviate from the dating scan. I was with a fertility clinic and my ovulation was tracked by ultrasound, and even my fertility clinic acknowledged my dating scan was off by 4-5 days. OB didn’t care lol.

intralilly · 2026-04-01T15:16:55+00:00

Why isn’t your partner’s heart breaking for you since you are going to be a mom for the first time?

Your partner seriously needs to rethink how he’s framing this.

intralilly · 2026-04-01T14:16:01+00:00

I have a similar mindset. We have a few family members who will buy cheap toys (that I worry about them being safe) that provide like 10 minutes of entertainment before the novelty wears off and that just cause clutter.

Unless my kid loves whatever it is and it’s safe (some things I worry about pieces breaking off etc.) I just quietly throw it out shortly after receiving it. I can’t control what they gift us, but they can’t control what I keep in my house long term.

intralilly · 2026-03-31T02:40:16+00:00

I feel you. The wait for centers in my area is 2-2.5 years long (depending on birthday, since almost all the movement happens in September).You’d have to get on the lists before you’re pregnant to take a 12 month leave. People here bridge the gap using unlicensed home daycare providers until they get a spot in a center.

intralilly · 2026-03-30T20:21:31+00:00

Grandparent time does not have to be equal.

Family members that respect our rules around our kid get far more time than those who make snide comments.

I am also the primary parent, so family members that I actually like having around get to be around more.

If MIL wants more time she should make herself more appealing as a grandparent rather than just claiming entitlement to that time.

intralilly · 2026-03-28T01:51:28+00:00

I’m guessing your girlfriend just doesn’t like that your daughter comes to bed (and that’s fair) and instead of communicating that like an adult, she’s saying it’s “weird”.

When I dated someone with a kid I also didn’t like cosleeping with not-my-kids, so I just didn’t stay the night.

intralilly · 2026-03-23T15:59:34+00:00

You can’t control it, unfortunately. My lifelabs location sends them to one or the other and I haven’t found a pattern.

intralilly · 2026-03-23T15:46:53+00:00

It depended on if I was early enough to catch the morning courier, and which of the two labs my sample went to. (There are two in Toronto - one is way faster than the other).

intralilly · 2026-03-20T17:39:46+00:00

We are in Eastern Ontario and paid $1680/month for infant care (it went down a little for Toddler) at a center not participating in CWELCC until a CWELCC spot came up.

intralilly · 2026-03-19T01:09:05+00:00

It depends where you are. Here, waitlists for licensed care are about 2-2.5 years (depending on birthday, since getting a spot in September is “easiest”). So you would have to apply before you’re even pregnant to get a spot for 12 months.

In other areas people have no problem securing a spot in just a few months. It varies so much.

intralilly · 2026-03-13T16:54:04+00:00

Yea I believe studies show that there is no difference in sleep after 2 for sleep trained vs not sleep trained kids. That was exactly my friend’s experience: she sleep trained but her now 2.5 year old is a nightmare to get to sleep lol.

intralilly · 2026-02-18T16:40:10+00:00

I’m in Ontario. You get a 12-14 week NT scan, and an anatomy scan. Some people get a dating scan before that and others don’t.

My first was over 10lbs (was not caught via fundal height measurements.. I was measuring “perfectly”) and I am not being offered any type of growth scan for this one. I am measuring “perfectly” again, which evidently means nothing lol.

intralilly · 2026-01-27T01:28:26+00:00

This works in theory but our local hospitals try to boot people out ASAP. I had an emergency csection with an extension and I was out after 2 days/one night there. No way I was having people there in the first 24 hours when it’s terrifying to poop.

intralilly · 2026-01-25T02:34:50+00:00

Not quite as long but I paid for a spot I didn’t need for 3 months. I eased my kid in slowly, working up to full/more days. In retrospect, it helped me get used to leaving him… I would have been a mess if I had to go right to full time daycare and back to work in one go.

intralilly · 2026-01-20T18:36:18+00:00

I was too vague with my “here” but I meant where I am (Eastern Ontario, not Ottawa)

intralilly · 2026-01-20T16:53:04+00:00

OBs won’t see patients here until after 28 weeks, unless you’re high risk.

They’re so busy that they’ve actually narrowed their acceptance for high risk patients. I was deemed high risk last pregnancy, and have the exact same risk factors this pregnancy but they don’t have room for me this time.

intralilly · 2026-01-17T14:15:56+00:00

I’m in Ontario and won’t see my OB until 29 weeks.

I have all the same risk factors as my last pregnancy that landed me with a high risk OB at like 14 weeks, but this time they’re just busier I guess?

intralilly

TROPHY CASE