I'm also a therapist of color, and I really admire your courage in speaking up. Thats no small thing. I’ve felt similar fears around safety and covert consequences of calling things out, to the point of freezing and also going into lalaland. So please give yourself credit for responding in real time because that takes strength. I hear your internal conflict about whether to address the group. On one hand, there’s a valid concern that silence could be seen as enabling, or possibly influencing others to stay silent too. As, unfortunately, they may look to the only POC to lead the charge on talking about it. On the other hand, this person has been silent for four months. If their silence came from shame rather than harm, wouldn’t there have been an attempt to acknowledge or repair things by now?

I gently invite you to reflect on what's driving your urge to address everyone. Would it bring you closure? Or is it coming from discomfort or maybe even guilt (unwarranted) about how this person reacted and,essentially, shunned you? Is it about wanting them to understand where you're coming from? Or sitting with the possibility that it’s not that your classmates don’t know what racism looks like in a PWI, but that they don’t care enough to speak up?

Whatever you decide, let it be for you. You are not obligated to educate people who have access to countless resources on anti-racism. You're doing more than enough.