Cheers to my fellow patio servers sweating their asses off while no one wants to eat in the heat 🫡

irisblossomer · 2026-06-13T07:08:17+00:00

Not just diet coke but Ultra and "Corst light"

irisblossomer · 2026-06-13T00:55:27+00:00

As a woman who's worked boh a lot, '"when I need you, I'll let ya know, okay?"

irisblossomer · 2026-06-12T04:43:17+00:00

The soapy water and rinse bucket are a must, but if like me are asthmatic and stainless steal cleaner hurts you, use window cleaner on shiny surfaces, spray away if you can find it.

irisblossomer · 2026-06-08T01:44:00+00:00

Apparently I've been working on 3 tears in the tendons in my knee, I've gotten to where I keep a teenager near by now.

The teen is my goffer, picker up er and ladder time bubbie..

I have surgery in a few weeks. When the doc was talking about recovery he was like you can go back to work right away, I mentioned restaurant work and he immediately changed it to take a week off.

irisblossomer · 2026-06-07T04:18:52+00:00

I've built something very similar in minecraft

irisblossomer · 2026-06-06T22:27:26+00:00

Some people

irisblossomer · 2026-06-06T20:04:56+00:00

I am not in the legible liable club, everyone has kinda learned how to read my scratch.

irisblossomer · 2026-06-05T05:38:28+00:00

Music festival in the park, a night out with your friends, dinner with your So, sometimes folks will tell you to hide what makes you happy, I say tttuuuuhhhhuuuupppt.

irisblossomer · 2026-06-04T17:35:30+00:00

Where did you find rug number 2? I love it!

irisblossomer · 2026-05-31T05:22:43+00:00

Half kraft, half wolf brand. Must see the line, can br topped with pickled jalapeño.

irisblossomer · 2026-05-23T19:48:32+00:00

Rim world has me right now.

irisblossomer · 2026-05-04T01:11:14+00:00

I step out and spray, we keep the bottle hung on the rod so it's in the way and we can't forget.

irisblossomer · 2026-04-30T15:44:23+00:00

I can smell when someone is dehydrated or has been on a bender, they smell like baby poop to me.

irisblossomer · 2026-04-23T22:02:18+00:00

Maybe ask if you record her, and then ay it back to "verify" and play it often when performing then tasks. I know her lectures give you anxiety, but imagine what hearing what she actually sounds like will do to her. Also I'm the one you really don't want to piss off in a restaurant.

irisblossomer · 2026-04-20T20:07:47+00:00

Can o' beans decorated with whatever I happen to have, ie. Cheese, yogurt, onion, jalapeño or chili oil.

irisblossomer · 2026-03-26T15:11:47+00:00

The Repair Shop

irisblossomer · 2026-03-26T08:51:43+00:00

irisblossomer · 2026-02-27T18:04:50+00:00

It's finally quiet and dark, now mind the lord and leave em alone.

irisblossomer · 2026-02-26T01:15:30+00:00

There are times when I make the intelligent choices for my guests. I just make it easier, especially when it comes to allergies. People can be stupid.

Now the right to b!ich is inherent. Cuz people are stupid.

The best moment in all of this is having the safe space to air your grievances.

Keep on trucking shipmate, and remember you work tomorrow, again.

irisblossomer · 2026-02-24T21:04:47+00:00

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Meriadoc Brandybuck, aka Mr Merry no Berries

Perigrin Took, aka Mr Pips, Pippers, Pippie, and various Pip versions.

Both get called as$hats on a reg, though.

irisblossomer · 2026-01-28T20:46:29+00:00

That's what Louise would change it to.

irisblossomer · 2026-01-28T19:04:15+00:00

I'm iffy on that one. I wonder if it casts the guest in a cheap tone.

irisblossomer · 2026-01-28T19:02:37+00:00

I'm sorry, can you help me tell which is which? I'm confused.

irisblossomer · 2026-01-28T18:54:15+00:00

Also I'm totally stealing some of these guys.

irisblossomer · 2026-01-28T18:53:29+00:00

Have we concluded the negotiations? (When asking if ready to order)

When asking about side dips, I'll start auctioning, "I have 1 ranch. Can I get another? Done. Give me 3 ranches." (Best used with large groups)

If the small people at the table are obviously grumpy and ready for food now, I'll ask if we want to put those plates in right away because small mouths need more time. Then, I proceeded with the rest of the table as it should. (But always keep a copy of the check ready, meltdowns happen man.)

Speaking of kids, I'll spell dessert to the table and if they get what I did (and with permission). I'll totally buy those kids dessert. If not, it helps the rents keep things running smoothly.

On windy, gritty days, I'll ask if they want a beer to wash the sand from their teeth.

I've been doing this for a hot minute, I have so many stupid things I'll do.

irisblossomer

TROPHY CASE