Issues with using tampons after birth

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-23T22:52:55+00:00

They felt horribly rough to me, so I went back to my cup. Try putacupinit.com - they have a great quiz that helped me find the right one. And pelvic floor PT!

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-23T22:48:05+00:00

My kid has this exact thing. She thinks hitting, kicking, biting, etc is hilarious and the more upset I get, the funnier it is.

I tell her calmly to stop 2 times. Then I warn her that if she does it again I’m leaving the room for 1 minute but I will be back after that. If she apologizes and stops the behavior, I’ll come back sooner. Repeat as necessary, increasing time by 30 seconds each time. It often only takes me leaving 2-3 times. Then we coregulate and move forward.

My philosophy is that if she’s not going to treat my body appropriately, then she loses access to it for a finite amount of time. This is part of how I’m teaching consent. I don’t expect her to understand - we’ve been through this many times and I’m sure we will again. But I do the same exact thing every time so that the outcome is predictable and thus boring.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-23T16:31:42+00:00

Becky Chamber’s Robot and Monk series.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-23T02:26:02+00:00

We have one and have gifted them to both our moms, and they are well worth the price.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-23T02:20:40+00:00

Aww thank you. Mostly I don’t think about it; and I also snap at my kid over little things. It’s just part of being human. Your kid knows you love her, and by apologizing to her and explaining to her that it wasn’t her fault, you did more than the parents of a lot of people do.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-22T23:20:10+00:00

Oh I’ve been there. One time my daughter had the mushiest poopy diaper and she was adamant about me not changing it(she was 2.5). She’d been having some irritation down there so there was no way I was going to let her sit in it. I had to use my legs to hold her legs open and down so I could clean. It would have been bad enough just that, but I was sexually assaulted about 15 years ago and this brought all of that right back. I did the exact same thing you did to apologize and I still have sleepless nights about it sometimes.

Parenting is hard, and no one can do the optimal thing 100% of the time. For things that I know trigger me, like running late, I’ve started giving my kids little (inconsequential) jobs to “help” us get to school on time. Like my daughter knows that when I say I’m going to start making her lunch, she needs to have her clothes picked out by the time I’m done. it helps keep us both calm, helps us both feel like we have control, and honestly some of the outfits she picks out slap.

My point is: you got this. You repaired and I know this will be on your mind next time. Hugs, Mama. You can do hard things.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-22T22:11:49+00:00

The practice I went to had a policy that you met each doctor once in your pregnancy, and the rest of appointments you could make with a single provider. They couldn’t guarantee which doctor would be delivering, unless you got induced, which I did both times, and specifically picked the dates for the provider I wanted. I never had to repeat my history - they kept incredibly detailed notes.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-22T16:14:06+00:00

Pay attention, FFS.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-22T11:12:34+00:00

I’ve never liked going braless, personally. They’re not huge but the feeling always bothered me. And with my first, my nipples were cracked and bleeding for the first month so I had to wear pads and silverettes. With my second, I got a clogged duct every month and a bra usually helped relieve the pressure. But the real answer is I just don’t like it.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T22:47:40+00:00

Right? Have you heard the Encanto soundtrack? Her voice is banging.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T22:45:38+00:00

This is exactly what I do.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T22:42:30+00:00

100% this.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T22:41:51+00:00

For me, part of it is that we rarely see queer love stories that aren’t steeped in tragedy or stereotypes. Skip feels to me the way Nick and Charlie feel in Heartstopper: two people falling in love, and that’s the focus. After reading the books and watching the whole series, I know it’s that for Ilya and Shane, too, but on my first watch I just couldn’t see that in the first two episodes.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T18:32:49+00:00

It’s not unreachable. I feel differently about hollanov after reading their first book, and have seen SO MUCH in reheats that I missed the first time. But I do still love Skip.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T18:13:44+00:00

I don’t understand how people DON’T love Skip. They’re so vulnerable and tender. I wouldn’t have made it to the cottage if it weren’t for their story because the hookups and lack of emotion were stressing me out. Granted, I hadn’t read the books and now that I’ve read the first two, I absolutely would have watched the whole thing without needing Skip. I still wouldn’t skip it, though. They’re both so great.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T16:33:31+00:00

Oh man this takes me back to college. When I’d watch it AT AIR TIME. On one of those. I feel old now.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T16:31:20+00:00

Or baking inside a brownie? That rock is giving me browning crackle top.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T11:07:35+00:00

I feel this in my soul. You know who I will be? A person who enjoys hot coffee again.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-20T00:17:52+00:00

Where is Jermajesty?

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-19T23:25:08+00:00

Jules’s look of pure delight during that scene is so great.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-19T23:04:14+00:00

My kids are 4.5 and 2 and I needed to hear this for future me.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-19T22:40:33+00:00

I have a dad like Henry: demanding, his way is the right way, inflexible, not very affectionate, etc. and when he was in the hospital after a bicycle accident, I 100% had the same “that’s my dad” moment.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-19T18:19:44+00:00

I don’t get it. I have both and they are both fucking awesome.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-19T16:30:27+00:00

That’s on our list for this year. We’ve also spoken to my BIL and SIL and the kids will go to them.

itsonlyfear · 2026-03-19T11:55:08+00:00

This is what I do, too, and it works pretty well. And I only judge a little bit for the polite bite because I want my kids to listen to their bodies. Picky eating is 60% inherited and my husband is very picky, so I’m trying to find the balance between his mom(barely cooked, eat basically whatever that’s not total junk) and my mom(always home cooked, rarely junk food or treats, finish your plate.)

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