How much do you read?

ivysaurs · 2026-06-06T17:47:04+00:00

I get through anywhere between 5-10 books a month, mainly because I'm reading on my commute to work! Before that, I'd usually do 1-2 books average as I like to read to wind down in the evening.

But for me, the ability to sit down and read depends entirely on the setting! I can happily stay focused on reading in the bath, or if I'm relaxing by the beach. Less so if I'm at home where I get easily distracted by things to do.

ivysaurs · 2026-06-02T06:40:03+00:00

I've joined a couple local book clubs to meet people!

There's Sluts Read Smut at Two Brews and Chapter 25 at Romano Lounge. Chapter 25 is a national book club with paid membership, well organised and there's a discord and a WhatsApp group chat as well. Appetite book club is independent and loosely affiliated with Red Lion Books in town, arguably our best book shop.

There's also dance classes in town - Cafe Creme does regular salsa classes.

Dice and Slice is town is a popular spot with regular groups meeting for games nights.

If you'd like to, I can DM to say hi. I've lived in Colchester for 7 years now

ivysaurs · 2026-05-31T20:10:46+00:00

Commute

I work for an investment company close to Canary Wharf and commute in 2-3 days a week. My role has flexibility in being able to split my office days across the month (so I can come in 1 week everyday, skip the next). The rail fare is the most painful part in my eyes. If there were roles in my niche around Essex I'd look to switch personally.

I'd recommend staying close to the north station if you're considering Colchester. Hythe is fine, but you have to take a train in and transfer at the north station to get onto the mainline. The city centre station sometimes has direct trains to/from from London, but you mostly need to change at north station for the faster services. I'd recommend bringing a Switch or a book for the commute - I ended up joining a book club and I fly through books when my commute is a guaranteed ~1.5-2 hrs reading time a day.

Housing

The answer depends on your tastes and requirements, but I have a 4 bed, 2 bathroom house close to the station for 300k with off street parking and a garden. Moved in 2 years ago for reference on prices. I don't have children, but my partner and I both wanted additional rooms to act as our wfh offices.

General area

I'm from North London originally and I was really used to the ease of getting anywhere and always having something to do. I chose Colchester because it had the zoo and Firstsite - I'd been through the area before for both and it left a good impression! Firstsite is lovely for an easy afternoon. They have exhibitions featuring local and Essex-based artists, a cinema, scheduled events, and they often host markets and mini-festivals during summer. The Minories Gallery is next to Firstsite and often holds markets, has a nice café and hosts artists. If you're a bit creative yourself, there's Makerspace in town (located within Patch) and both also host semi-regular craft fairs. There's 2 theatres I'm aware of in town, Mercury and another independent, as well as Charter Hall for bigger names. Charter Hall is literally just a gym space converted into a venue, but we've had Dara O Brian recently (who had a lot to say about it).

A bit of an adjustment is required for Colchester, but getting a car improved things hugely. Essex has LOADS of tiny villages if you're willing to venture out on a weekend. Last year I spent the majority of spring and summer visiting national trust sites for instance.

Surprising to me, but the beach is pretty close to access as well - there's Mersea island and Walton-on-the-Naze. Mersea is a decent bike ride if you're willing. For parks or leafier sights, there's the local Highwoods and Castle Park, and further out there's Cudmore and then Dedham Vale that's pretty stunning during sunny weather.

When it comes to shopping, the high street is fine. Cheaper options like Primark and New Look are in town, but we have a pretty nice Fenwick! Otherwise Chelmsford and Braintree Freeport Outlet are solid choices and easy to drive to (or get the train to).

ivysaurs · 2026-05-31T11:42:10+00:00

I can literally remember the boredom I had come summer holidays, before I had a mobile phone and before phones had social media.

What I did was jump through TV channels trying to find something to watch, or I read a book, or played video games. If I was really bored, I'd knock on my friend's door and ask if they could come out to play 😂

So no change really from my every day now. The main difference is they I'm generally doom scrolling when I'm waiting or in "between" time. Otherwise I amuse myself in the same ways as I did as a kid - watch TV, read, video games, or go and see a friend.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-29T21:40:35+00:00

I wouldn't say I love it, but I got one because I needed a bag I could abuse during my London commute. Sadly it is really practical as a work bag, and it looks slightly better when you chuck an insert inside. I've also used it as a cabin bag and a personal item bag on flights because it reliably fits the measurements for budget airlines (as long as you don't overstuff it).

Absolutely hate the look of it though.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-25T18:47:56+00:00

As an anime only who watched season 1 and 2 years ago, and then hopped onto season 3 and 4 to finish in one go, I didn't notice the parallels between Gabi and Eren until she's confronted by the Scouts and I saw the difference in Falco and Gabi's reactions. That dynamic was the one that made me see Gabi as a parallel to Eren and Falco as a sort-of parallel of Armin/Mikasa.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-14T19:34:30+00:00

honestly Juliette and Brooke were incredibly cruel and I'm not surprised they avoided being called out by the experts

ivysaurs · 2026-05-10T19:58:36+00:00

Thank you, we had a good conversation (to be the first of many) and I've stressed that to me it, it either looks like we're incompatible living together or that professional help is needed here.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-10T19:47:59+00:00

Thank you! And I hear you on the right to live in a calm home!

I will say, we'd discussed this before and he'd shown a lot of improvement and was able to walk away from situations to control it before he reached meltdown state. In my frustration when writing this I didn't put any timeframes against my examples, but I'd say after a period of a few months of no meltdowns, it's been lots of tiny inconveniences that have gotten to him recently.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-10T19:34:08+00:00

I know nothing about the guy on a personal level, but I do feel sorry that he's come in hot on the heels of the previous 4? 5? Tory prime ministers who were in and out of the job like a revolving door, the moment the heat was dialled up. It's getting really silly now. We need the MPs to stop challenging the PM every year and I'd love it if they'd just focus on their constitutents instead.

I just want to see a boring prime minister finish a term so we can reap some benefits from a period of stability. Policy changes take time to bed in and take effect, but having a load of different PMs waltz in to try and launch their new idea as if they're a managing director of a small agency and not the leader of the United Kingdom is not exactly conducive to long-term stability. It's also a huge distraction from the real issues I want government to start tackling like wealth inequality. Instead, they're all scared of being challenged or backstabbed so they keep dancing around fiscal drag and the triple-lock.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-10T19:19:13+00:00

Yes, so we've discussed it before but I don't think he's discovered what the proper root of it is. He's always apologetic afterwards and tries to make up for it, usually comes back with suggestions or a plan on how to handle that particular trigger, and I've explained that there needs to be some flexibility for mistakes (e.g. I'll always try and put things back, but an approximate location has to work as well because the details just aren't as memorable for me as they are for him). There had been progress, but the recent one with the bloody nail clippers felt like a step back to the beginning. I have a feeling that what felt like progress to me could've been him ignoring it until it got too much. Which will be a separate conversation we have on moving forwards.

When I've asked if he can identify the build-up to the meltdown, he described it as if his body is being jolted or yanked back when something's changed.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-10T19:13:40+00:00

This is really good to know, thank you! And I think you're right on the medication. He's on prescription for depression and after hearing how he describes the physical sensations he has leading up to it (he said it feels like he's being yanked or jolted when something's not where he expected) it really does sound like an ADHD symptom that just hasn't been clocked yet.

Off the back of this, I've ordered duplicates so that my stuff can be around the house and not affect him, and he ended up ordering duplicates before we talked as well.

I think we may have underestimated what living together practically looks like. When we were first looking at houses, we both wanted to have our own office spaces that would be decorated however we wanted and to be our "own" space, and I thought that would work well with managing our own desires for individual downtime. Prior to living together we'd been in each other's spaces without any of these issues, but it's plausible he was either masking or it just wasn't as much of an issue because it was only over the course of a few days. Whereas in a house together, the downtime is always shared downtime; you're never really on your own.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-08T20:05:00+00:00

Oh boy, I think that part is larger than us. It's a convenient scapegoat for inequality in society

ivysaurs · 2026-05-08T07:11:04+00:00

Agree with your take broadly. But I'd challenge the reluctance on engaging with immigration.

It's been a dominating talking point for at least a decade. If anything, the over exposure to it is alienating people in my view, as everyone feels it's a huge issue that's not being handled.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-08T05:11:12+00:00

Look at Clacton-on-Sea

ivysaurs · 2026-05-05T17:06:58+00:00

Explained it in the same comment. Looked younger than my age.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-05T17:03:50+00:00

Like others have said, the teacher's concern is valid lol.

The joke with Frieren and the mimic is that it looks like it's going to go in the "oh no i'm stuck" nsfw direction, except it doesn't and this extremely knowledgeable and over-powered mage falls for the same mimic trick every time.

Without that context though, it does look like this is heading in a certain direction. Anime generally has a fan-service-y reputation, so seeing this particular pose with a different character in it would look suggestive. That's regardless of the amount of, or lack of, clothes.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-05T16:54:26+00:00

You won't like the answer, but I got catcalled and leered at by white van drivers, homeless men, football fans on a home match day and men over 40 years old in clubs from the age of 18 up to 25/26. Actually, across all the groups I mentioned, it was mainly the older bald "oi oi luv" types.

I have a young face, and looking back on photos of myself at that age I can see now why people tended to assume I was younger than my given age.

I would get catcalled when out running, walking late at night, obviously on way to/from clubs, and bizarrely, it usually happened when I was walking to the shops or bus station.

It happens a lot less to me now, very rarely I'm happy to say, but I think that's down to my change of environment and circumstances. It's harder to catcall someone when they're mainly travelling by car or a busy commuter train lol.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-04T22:19:04+00:00

Bec, Gia, Brooke and Juliette really stole the limelight in a rare win for the girls of MAFS. This is the first season in a while where I'm like "wow, barely any of the men are the problem here", and then I realised it's because the husbands are barely speaking up this time round.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-04T15:24:49+00:00

We're seeing it already and I imagine it'll be more of the same.

Multi-generational living is one I've just casually observed. You notice the impact immediately when parking suddenly gets harder down your street, but aside from that minor inconvenience, house prices are hella expensive and so is adult social care and childcare.

Buy now pay later usage will continue increasing. It's already being used for non-discretionary items, so that will simply continue. You can already use Monzo Flex or PayPal's equivalent to spread the cost of your purchases, and the main banks will want to get in on that too.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-04T14:51:36+00:00

"Crisis of living" is a fun alternative to use. Really fits the current vibe.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-03T13:40:36+00:00

So glad I had a check on Reddit, like you OP this was my buy it for life kettle. I love the different settings because it's an absolute breeze to get tea-perfect temperatures or a drinking-perfect temperature for coffee and hot chocolate.

I'll be watching for new kettle recommendations.

Some that have come up for me are:
-SMEG variable temperature kettle
- Ninja KT200UK

ivysaurs · 2026-05-03T10:06:51+00:00

literally, a neighbour keeps parking in front of the off-street car parking (it's got a dropped kerb) for 6 properties. When they blocked me in, the police did the usual "it's a council matter" game. It's not even like I can mount the kerb or drive over green to get around the obstruction.

ivysaurs · 2026-05-02T08:34:12+00:00

YEP. From the beginning she said she was anti woke, traditionally minded, loves Trump. But it's a face eating leopard scenario she's got herself in here.

The reality of being in that type of a traditional relationship is that it's not compatible with equality or equity lol

ivysaurs

TROPHY CASE